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Grief Healing Discussion Groups

Kieron

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    628
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About Kieron

  • Rank
    Advanced Member

Previous Fields

  • Your relationship to the individual who died
    Partner, best friend
  • Date of Death
    3/22/2017
  • Name/Location of Hospice if they were involved:
    NA

Profile Information

  • Your gender
    Male
  • Location (city, state)
    Mn

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  1. it's a heavy feeling, James. I remember it well. 💖
  2. You could run a search engine for the term "solar plexus" and "metaphysical" or "meaning" or something similar, and see what you find. Take what resonates, leave the rest. 🙂 As for stuck emotions, there is a system called Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) out there that you can learn about. There are some studies and findings with empirical evidence that it can work, including on combat veterans with PTSD, but it depends on your outlook. I never really got into it but I know someone who swears by it.
  3. Welcome, and sorry you have experienced this unexpected and unwanted turn of life. it's okay to not know what you're doing. This is definitely the time of feeling overwhelmed, scared, unsure, etc. It sounds like you are taking sensible steps of finding support, which will help in some ways, but as others have said, there are some steps that no one else can take for us. But we're here for you. ❤️
  4. It's likely connected. We feel grief in our physical body, because emotions have to go somewhere. If they have no outlet, it's possible they lodge in the body until we are able to process them and release them. I remember both my arms aching endlessly for months afterward. A deep-tissue massage therapist told me that we hold grief in our arms, which makes a lot of sense.
  5. Moona, you've gotten great feedback so far, but one thing that jumped out at me: you might want to be sure you are hydrating yourself, i.e. drink plenty of water. When we're grieving, it's easy to lose touch with body signals, and if you're crying a lot, you'd need to replenish those fluids, anyway. So please try to do that as often as possible. 😊
  6. Kay, no doubt you have tried it all in your battle with hypertension. But just in case, a physician mentioned to me that dried red hibiscus flowers, made into tea, lower blood pressure and studies have borne this out. For whatever this info is worth to you. 🌺 And I was curious if George/I Praise Him has researched it, too. Looks like it could mess with blood sugar levels if consumed too much. So I guess it's a mixed bag, like so much in life.
  7. What a sweet boy. Just wanted to say I sympathize but find it difficult to read this particular forum, as I have an older cat and she's been with me since 2007 so I am trying not to think too closely about this topic, but I definitely understand and am sorry you have lost your little guy. 💖
  8. this is exactly right. I hadn't thought of it in this way but it's essentially what happened for us. James, I read the words you use to describe her, and yourself, and understand where you are coming from and have said similar things to myself or others. With time, I came to see more nuance in the situations that seemed so clear-cut, but it's a path each of us has to take on our own, I suppose.
  9. There's just no end to the whittling away of things that used to be. There had been some trouble with the trash collection not happening, so I had to call the city and see what the issue is. We got that sorted out and then the representative asked if we still needed the designation for disabled/handicapped trash collection (which means the sanitation worker would collect the bin even if it wasn't set out properly, because the designation signals the disabled person can't manage the bin. It was something he set up long ago, in case I was not around to handle it.) I had to say, of course
  10. I think it's pretty understandable. I remember feeling like the night was closing in on me, knowing that a restless night was ahead and dreading having to try to go to bed. It's really an unpleasant sensation. You are not alone in this, not a bit.
  11. It's okay to not know. This loss and the ensuing life change you describe are a lot like sitting, stunned, in the silence that falls in the wake of a natural disaster. And I'm sorry, too, because that kind of loss so swiftly and for someone as young as he was, those are the losses that make no sense on any level. 🙁
  12. As an antidote to "bleak world," the following link is from someone's Tumblr blog. I can't post the short clip here probably because the system doesn't allow it, but it does work and it seems to be a safe blog. And it's positive, not spam and not garbage. If all dogs go to heaven, then this could be it! Look at them frolic! https://liriusworlfaws.tumblr.com/post/648937181014081536
  13. Well, they're kind of jumbled together, in my experience, and telling them apart, when they hit you at a later time, really doesn't matter in the moment. You will feel whatever you feel, when you feel it, and that's entirely valid. I just think that in societies where we're grief-avoidant, or illiterate in grieving, the tendency is to put off grief as long as possible. So if you let yourself feel, from the beginning, as much as you are able, then you will fare much better than will someone who runs from their grief. Does that make sense?
  14. Kay, I'm so sorry this is another thing weighing you down. 😞
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