Feeling Sorry For Myself....

[karenb]

It's a few days that Jack has been gone for two years and I am improving but not tonight. I'm just staring into space with not even crying but tears are running off my face. I just miss my husband. I went with a group of women for a wonderful lunch but I just kind of kept quiet because they all have husbands with that kind of conversation and then there's me! They are good people, caring people but then there's just me! Wow, am I feeling sorry for myself or what? Thanks for listening my friends....I would be very sad if I didn't have you all.

[ustwo]

I understand Karen. Hold on and the wave will pass. I always feel like the square peg that doesn't fit into the round hole when I'm with other people. Once and a while those friends are able to make me laugh for a moment. Two years......I don't know how time has gone on. I am grateful that the friends I have developed here make a point of including me in activities. Yes, I cover my sorrow.......no one can fill the emptiness. Karen, I hope today is a little better day.

Always Gene!

Always!

[teny]

Karen I understand the feeling only Ithought it was me that had this terrible emtiness because it has not been so long that I lost YIANI. Im so sorry you feel that way.You were asupport for me when Istartet this site and I hope with all my heart that you be strong again .Unfortunatly we are so far away WE could be more of support to each other.Take care . your friend from far away TENY

[kayc]

Oh Karen, I'm sorry! It is okay to feel sorry for yourself sometimes! I think I will always feel like a square peg in a round hole from here on out. I really don't fit in anywhere, not with marrieds and not with singles, and in a way, not even with the widowed. I will always miss my George, until the day I die. I am learning to live on my own and try to be happy with that, I am trying to look on the bright side (I can fix dinner or not, I can make my cards, I can buy stamps without anyone complaining, I can go for a walk without worrying about it taking time away from someone) but the truth is, I'd rather have my husband there, and besides, George loved watching me stamp, he never deprived me of anything, and wasn't the least bit controlling. We had such an easy way with each other. How can we not miss what we had? I am learning to live with the loss, but we never "like" it, it's just something we must do. I am learning to be grateful for what we had together, grateful that I had it at all, and as I found myself telling a friend yesterday, I derive a comfort, a security, a smile inside of myself, knowing that George and I loved each other with all of our hearts...that makes me more secure for the rest of my life...no one can ever take that away from me or deprive me of that, it is mine, whether he is here or not. I hope you have a better day and can smile because you have a special love, even though you miss him so much.

[Stallyn]

Karen,

I am so sorry you are down, I remember you told me some time ago its OK to worry for yourself, its hard to fit in with others with our experience. I hope you feel better, I have faith in you being a strong woman..I will say a prayer for you;

Your friend,

William