New To This Group

[Dale&Sue]

Hi Everyone: I've just registered for this group. In October, my partner of 20 years died suddenly. He was 500 miles away on a job site when he died.

I just want to touch base and read what others who experience loss are feeling and how they "cope." I'm almost paralyzed with grief some days and there are already people in my life who seem to think I should be "over it" and moving on. I will never get over this. What I might learn to do is integrate the loss and sadness into my life...to turn it into something I can at least live with. In the meantime, I am having panic attacks and sometimes feel like I'm going to die. All I know is that I'm never, ever going to see him again and the thought breaks my heart. Thanks for letting me write about this. I think it's hard for anyone who's not gone through this to understand the intense pain. Sue

[LarrysGirl]

Hi Sue, I'm so sorry about the recent loss of your husband. It is utter nonsense when people say the stupid things like you should be over it, etc. In the beginning it made me angry but now I just let it go in one ear and out the other. They don't know what they are talking about. I'm glad you found this grief site. There is so much support and understanding and this will help you to heal. Deborah

[Susie Q]

Dear Sue

You have found a good place to just help you get through the darkest times. I lost my husband of 32 years suddenly in August so I know what you mean. I have found tremendous wisdom and support from this group. My thoughts are with you Susie Q

[mrspapajohn]

Sue -- Please accept my sincere sympathy for your loss of Dale. I believe that one thing you will learn if you continue on this site (and I hope you do; I believe it saved my life) is that there is no "normal" way to grieve. Anything is permissable no matter how "crazy" it may seem at the time. Another thing is that grief has no timetable. It comes and goes on its own schedule. And there are always setbacks. Just when we think we are doing better, we hear a song, or smell a familiar smell, or just a random thought pops in just to torture us a little more and off we go. I believe that you will find the people here "get it" when even many of your dearest friends and relatives don't. We have all walked in your shoes and continue to do so. It is a very long journey, maybe a lifetime. I hope that you will continue to post and to let us know how you are doing. Feel free to vent, rant, rave or even offer support to some one else. You will find nothing here but love and support.

Peace

Kathy

[moparlicious]

Sue,

I am so sorry to hear of your loss!!!!!!!!!!! It angers me so when others refer to our loss as a "IT". I have learned to accept people's ignorant remarks and hope and pray there "IT" never leaves them!!!Get over it and move on I feel are things people say when they don't know what to say. take one day at a time and keep coming back for my love of my life Dan has left this earth08/20/07, he was 41 years old.We were together 24 years and high school sweethearts.We have 3 children together. For he was my soul and my world. Not a day goes by I do not think of him or miss him and that will never change, I have come to accept things I cannot change and make the best of everyday for this is what Dan would want!!!!!!!! I have had a long hard journey and I like many others wanted to give up, but here on this site, has saved my life!!!!!!!!! I have come along way and we all are growing together on this journey. Don;t be hard on yourself, for this horrific loss we all are experiencing is so very difficult. You are loved and cared for by many. Love, Kim

[Kat2005]

Sue,

First let me say how sorry I am for your loss. I lost my husband of 25 years on June 23rd.

That is the day my whole world changed as I knew it. I am still trying to work through alot of anger. There are so many ups and downs to this journey sometimes I ask myself how much can one person take. I do know that my family here has helped me through alot of rough times. I can say anything and everyone understands. We are all here for you whenever you need us.

Take care,

Kat

[JohnG]

Hi Sue,

I'm so sorry for your loss.We are all feeling your pain. You have found a good place and can say anything you need to here.We will help you get through any way we can.

We are here for you.

Peace & Love,

John