It Was Actually An Okay Day!

[Jennalee]

I feel I must share the victory of an okay Friday to help encourage those having such a rough time right now.

This morning I woke up and wasn't sure why I should even bother getting up. Then I decided to get up anyway and called my friend Brandi. She was completely game for some coffee so we went and got some. Then I went shopping alone cause I desperately needed clothes. It was okay being by myself. I'm trying to come to peace with being alone as much as I can. Then I went to the bookstore I used to work many years ago back in college and spoke with my old manger. He said he'd love to see me back part time and I'm tempted to take him up on it just to kill some time.

Then I went home, checked a few forums and called an old friend who took me to the mall for a couple hours then we both went back to my house to reminisce. It was nice. She just left at 10:30 and I'm okay now. A tad lonely and yes, I did have a few moments after she left where I sobbed and screamed to God to bring Ajay back to me, but I'm okay now. Truly okay. It was... not a great day, not even a good day, but an okay day, and I'll take them where I can get them. I'm wishing all of you an okay day soon!

[Marion Claire]

It felt good to read this. Glad your day was ok. Wishing you more and more ok days to come. My day was ok too. Bad parts yes, but more good parts to the day. Throughout the day and evening had 2 daughters, 1 son-in-law, 3 grand daughters, 2 grandson-in-laws and 3 great grandchild come over. 3 babies all under 9 months has to make the rest of us smile.

[Korina]

So glad you had a better day!

Korina

[kayc]

That's great to hear, both of you! Yep, that's what I was talking about earlier this week, you'll have a whole bunch of indifferent days, some ggod days, some bad days. I hope it gets progressively better for you.

That's be great if you'd work part time in the book store, it'd get you out around people and kill some time.

I'd love to be doing something I loved and around people I liked.

[MZM]

Glad you had an ok day! My counselor said to me "The moment you start doing normal things again, like going out for coffee, reading a book, going shopping..its all a start to your healing"

For me, I knew that if i shopped again, I was back to being me and that would be the start of my healing... I finally went shopping last weekend. Didnt do my usual damage, but it was a start...i do believe a start is all we can ask for right now....

We will have ok days and not ok days and we just have to try...but also, be patient with ourselves....and good on you for starting something new like a job at your old book store....

Im planning on a gap year - leaving my current job and going to be a waitress in the states with my sister...

[Jennalee]

I'm so glad I posted this when I did, cause re-reading it gave me a reason to go on for at least one more day. The last two days have NOT been good, to say the least. I suspect part of it is because I may be PMSing (sorry guys) or it could be because, well, I am grieving, and recovery from grieving is not always linear. I hope this horrible dark cloud eases up for even a few moments today or maybe tomorrow. Right now I'm just not feeling very positive at all.