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Another Sad Day


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To add to my grieving and pain, I had to put my 16 year old cat (Sweetpea) down yesterday.

She meant so much to me and with the loss of my husband was always there.

She had become very sick and after the vet examined her and did xrays we found out she had Ca of the colon and had fluid in her abdomen and in her lungs.

I wonder if I was just so wrapped up in my grief that I didn't notice her going downhill...it just seemed to come to light over the last week.

I know she is not in pain now but feel very bad for the suffering she went through.

They say you are only given as much as you can handle but why now? It has only been 3 1/2 months since Cecil passed.

I feel defeated today!

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Oh, I am so so sorry. Oh my heart just aches for you. Melissa died December 25, 2003 and I had to let my 19 year old cat go on February 9, 2004. Oh my gosh I know the pain you are now in. If I could I would give you the biggest hug in person. I know I can not take away any of your pain, but I know how so very hard this can be. When Sunsine died I thought I would not make it through that day, let alone thinking about the next day. My life became minute by minute.

I know you don't feel that you will survive, or that you want to even try, but I hope it helps in some wee way to know that I made it through. You may want to check out the forum here for pet loss as it saved my life after I lost my Sunshine.

Cats are very good at hiding illness and I understand your guilt feelings but it does not mean that you are guilty. Oh my heart just aches for you.

I encourage you to keep talking.

Blessings and Courage, Carol Ann

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I know actually how you feel. My heart goes out to you. I lost my husband June'09 and just this past August I lost my little 18 year old poodle Cocoa. I felt lost. The silence was deafening. I didn't think I wanted any more pets but I think it was Kayc that suggested getting another one. I was reluctant at first but I have to say it has made all the difference in the world. I adopted a little 1-1/2 year old poodle a couple of months ago and it was the best thing I ever did. She is so much company and being so young she is much more demanding. She brings alot of joy into my life. She is exactly what I needed. Maybe in a couple of months you will feel the same and get another furry friend.

Take care, Kat

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I am so sorry you had this additional loss. We had to have our old crippled sheppard dog put down the day after my husband died last January. She could barely walk, and Mike was the only one that could carry her out to do her business. It was rather fitting, however, that she went about the same time as Mike, they adored each other, and she would have been miserable without him. I had just had total knee replacement, and there was no way I could take care of her, even before the surgery on my knee. Praying for comfort for you.

Mary (Queeniemary) in Arkansas

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I am so sorry for another loss with you having to put your cat down. I feel sad for you, and know how painful this can be. I lost Lacey, beautiful cat, over three years ago without warning. Just disappeared one day. She was 13, and could have been hiding some illness, although the last time I saw her alive, she was playing in the backyard.

However, a few years later I adopted a new young cat. And, less than a month before my mother passed on in October, I adopted a three month old kitten. I have to say that sometimes wild, sometimes very affectionate kitten has really helped me through the loss. The timing of this adoption was perfect. Even though she ate half of a plant I really liked today, I have to say kitten brings a lot of joy at this time in my life, and has also been good for my older shy calico cat. Maybe considering another pet is the last thing on your mind, but this may be something to consider in the near future. Take care, Grace

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Dear Abergsma,

You are so very welcome. Take good gentle care of yourself. It is a loving kind thing that you have done and I am just so sorry that by doing the best for your Sweetpea throws you into yet more grief to experience and move through.....I pray you are feeling a little less defeated now....I hold you in gentle prayer.

Dear Kat2005,

I am so sorry that you too know this pain. The silence is deafening for a time, that is for sure! I am so happy for you that your new poodle has made a world of difference for you. I too was reluctant to get another, but quite honestly, I knew I needed to get another, as I needed something in my life that depended on me, and gave me reason to get up every day, as at that time I still thought I was no better than the dirt on the ground. My self-worth was sorely lacking at that time. In other words, I could do my life for someone else but not for myself at that time. Getting my boy I have now, was the best thing I could have done. But at first, I did not even want to think on another. I am so sorry that you too had this additional loss to navigate through.

Dear Queeniemary,

I am so sorry that you too had this additional loss, and your own health issue on top of all of that. Oh my gosh what a load. You know I have no idea why, but I just had this thought if all us got together and ran the country, boy what a country that would be! Such courage, such strength, such compassion we all have, what a wonderful blessing we all are to one another. Again, I am just so sorry for what you have had to navigate through.

Dear Grace10,

I am so sorry for the loss of your Lacey. I am happy that your new kitties have helped you move through your grief. Oh my gosh, it is amazing to me what we humans can endure if we are put to the test. I would love to get another kittie, but I can not afford for one thing, and this boy of mine needs to be the only King of His castle, if you know what I mean.

Blessings and Courage, Carol Ann

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I'm so sorry you lost your cat too! I also experienced this...about two months after George died, his cat Tigger decided to leave. I got another cat, Chappy, and a couple of years later he died. And my cat George died. And my dog Lucky died. I was starting to feel a little angry as I felt like George's death was enough to contend with, did I have to lose all my pets too?! But we manage to survive it all, even though it hurts and we miss them terribly. :( When my cat, George died, I felt relieved that he was out of his suffering, but sorry he'd been through so much at the end...the same with my dog, Lucky. But I felt losing Chappy was senseless as he was eaten by a cougar...and I loved that cat, I'd felt he was God's special gift to me, and couldn't understand why he'd be taken so soon. It's just hard at best. (((hugs)))

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