nats Posted June 24, 2011 Report Share Posted June 24, 2011 Well tonight I had the biggest wave of grief to control....as I was unpacking boxes sorting items for a rummage sale this weekend I ran across many items from the our place I had forgotten about, pictures, cards, unopened puzzles (Ruth loved puzzles), and different assorted items that set off many memories of my beautiful wife....needless to say I was 100% knocked off my feet with a wave of pure emptiness and missing her, I have had these before but not like tonight, as I was sitting on the floor in tears viewing our pictures, the dogs got so excited and went into a frenzy playing, about the same time I got the most awesome contact from Ruth I have ever had almost like she was in the room, the room got very warm and I heard her voice only very faint, assuring me all was OK, and she is so pleased with how I am dealing with her being gone, I heard a quiver in her voice as if she were crying saying how much she missed me....when I heard that I just lay on the floor in total tears....after a few moments both dogs came to me and started kissing me and offered there comfort almost as if told to do so....anyway this journey we are on is the most unpredictable trip I have ever been on but I'm going to continue to move ahead as normal, and all is well now I really have a more comforting feeling now, I guess this was good having this sale and forcing me to unpack/sort these remaining boxes, one more roadblock conquered.....anyway just felt the need to share and get this off my mind..... God Bless All... NATS One of her many puzzles attached....she built several while sick I have them all framed...many we worked on together...the unopened one I plan on building very soon.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lainey Posted June 24, 2011 Report Share Posted June 24, 2011 Nats, I can totally understand why you'd be on the floor in total tears. What a special and wonderful visit you had from Ruth, and even the dogs felt her presence. I'm also going to do a garage sale with some of Lars' things(he was a pack rat)and as I was opening the boxes to mark items, the reality hit me hard.Like you said.. one more road block to get over. Lainey Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WaltC Posted June 24, 2011 Report Share Posted June 24, 2011 .....I heard her voice only very faint, assuring me all was OK, and she is so pleased with how I am dealing with her being gone, I heard a quiver in her voice as if she were crying saying how much she missed me....when I heard that I just lay on the floor in total tears...... STAN - I am happy for you and Ruth. Never forget how much she loves you, and will continue to love you forever - until you meet again. May God Bless You. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dwaynecg Posted June 24, 2011 Report Share Posted June 24, 2011 Nats, you got a blessing from God and Ruth. I am surrounded by Pauline everyday. She was an awesome decorator, and every nurse or other people could not believe the job she did in our apartment. I have not been able to even touch her clothes yet. I have to hand it to you and the job you did with her puzzles are GREAT. It gave me chills reading the experience you had. God Bless Dwayne Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kayc Posted June 25, 2011 Report Share Posted June 25, 2011 Nats, It sounds like this was a good experience, even though you missed her and cried, she comforted you and I think she told your dogs to go comfort you as well, isn't that neat! And the puzzle is beautiful! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nats Posted June 25, 2011 Author Report Share Posted June 25, 2011 Thank you all, Yes it was indeed an exceptional event, I'm thankful I have these "contacts" with her, they do change your outlook... we are having our sale today going kinda slow a little overcast but picking up some.... NATS Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pilla Posted June 26, 2011 Report Share Posted June 26, 2011 Thank you for posting your story Nats. I have been dreading going through Ed's things. It's only been 2 months since he died, but my landlord wants to sell the apartment, so I have decided to look on this as a positive thing. It will force me to sort through Ed's things sooner rather than later. I have been told that there is NO good time to go through your husband's things. This from a woman who, after 30 years, still has her husband's collection in boxes. My husband collected anything and everything, so it will be very emotional to move. I have some good friends that I can lean on here in reality, and new friends here on the HOV site, too. Pilla Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kayc Posted June 27, 2011 Report Share Posted June 27, 2011 Pilla, I'm glad you have friends to help you and hope you take them up on it. You're right, there is no good time to go through their things, but I think it's harder when the grief is fresh. Good luck. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nats Posted June 27, 2011 Author Report Share Posted June 27, 2011 Thank you for posting your story Nats. I have been dreading going through Ed's things. It's only been 2 months since he died, but my landlord wants to sell the apartment, so I have decided to look on this as a positive thing. It will force me to sort through Ed's things sooner rather than later. I have been told that there is NO good time to go through your husband's things. This from a woman who, after 30 years, still has her husband's collection in boxes. My husband collected anything and everything, so it will be very emotional to move. I have some good friends that I can lean on here in reality, and new friends here on the HOV site, too. Pilla Pilla, Your welcome....Let me elaborate some more on this process, I feel I have a first hand understanding of this from a womans point as well.....and here's why, see the new person in my life lost her husband 8/09, he was an avid car builder and mechanic, he had an entire garage full of car parts and a Corvette and 1940 Ford Coupe along with engines, parts, tools, etc., she/we are still sorting and selling items, she has sold the Vette but still has the Ford, while many items have been sorted we will always run across things that trigger us, but she has totally redone their house with her colors and decor "made it hers" she says, I also have moved from my marital home and am very blessed I have a beautiful new home, while we both have dreaded sorting, cleaning, selling and otherwise getting rid of our loved ones items we support each other but we feel a sense of loss again yet we also find a closure that is much needed and allows us to heal and continue....another thing it does is brings us closer to our spouses in the new way we are learning to love them, that's very important....anyway Brenda and myself both have our waves when we do what we must...one thing I did do was kept a few special pieces of Ruth's clothes in a garment bag unwashed and her smell is still present and at times I long to smell her sweet perfume and I open the bag for a brief moment, I cry and feel sad but only for a moment as the aroma soothes me instantly as I feel her presence totally surround my body, almost as if she is hugging me....my thoughts are with you as you take on this task but I assure you all will settle and you will find a comfort zone, just take it day by day.... NATS Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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