Jump to content
R.Everit55

loss of premature granddaughter

Recommended Posts

I belong in Loss of spouse.  I lost my wife seven months ago.  But I just lost our six day old granddaughter Lila Beth Sunday. Her twin Lilian is fighting.  They still belong in my DIL's belly. They were born at 24 weeks August 3rd.  My wife and I lost our own twin girls 26 years ago.  Stillborn. Our hearts broke.  Now our own son lost one of his little girls.  The other fighting.  I can't protect him.  I can't protect my granddaughter that remains.  I can't do anything.  Especially without my beloved wife.   Hearts are broken.  Children should never have to be taken from this world before their parents.  :(

Butch

 

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Dear Butch,

This is too much.  Unthinkable.  I don't know what to say, except my heart hurts SO much for you.   I will tell my family here, and we will pray for you and your precious family together in the morning, and I will pray for you right now.  We all know your story, and care that you are enduring so many hurts, and so much grief.  I think of you often, and wonder how you are doing.  You have suffered so much.  I wish I knew something wise and comforting to say to you.  I'm struggling to find words, but there aren't any for such as this.  Just know that we care.  I'm sending you warm hugs.

Carrie

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest

I too am so sorry Butch. You are helping your son by being there, by grieiving with him, and by holding onto hope with him. I'll pray for you all.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thank you all.  While hearts are broken for many things, hope remains in the fight of little Lily.  She had bowel surgery this morning.  But she is cautiously stable.  She's such a fighter.  I know twins have a bond.  And she would be thriving better with her sister beside her.  But Lila was meant to be in Heaven with her Grammy.  

My Grampy heart is broken.  But I see how Lily is fighting.  If she can fight at 2lbs then I can be strong for my grandsons and my son and DIL.  

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Butch,

My heart breaks for you and your family.  This must bring up all of the feelings you felt at the loss of your own twin girls, plus your heart is breaking for your kids having to go through this.  How are the boys doing?  Little Lily is an inspiration to us all.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

The boys are with me. They understand one of their little sisters is with Grammy in Heaven.  They talk to Allen and Katie daily.  But they are staying at the hospital.  They have a place like a Ronald McDonald House for parents of kids in the NICU who live far away.  The boys miss them.  I'm bringing them up there this weekend.  Of course they can't see Lily though.  Only photos.  The boys start school in a couple weeks.  Actually less.  So we are concentrating on getting set for that.  And enjoying the last summer days.  Tough with my knee recovery but I'm managing.  

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

How IS your knee doing, Butch?  Maybe having the boys with you is a lifesaver at the moment.  Are they excited about school?  My kids always loved the school shopping, finding out what teacher they'd get, etc. 

Thinking of you...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Kay, yes it's keeping me grounded to be in charge of the boys.  Noah is nervous as he is going into middle school... 6th grade.  Caleb is in 3rd.  Caleb is excited about everything in life.  Noah is much more sensitive in life.  

My knee is doing ok.  Still have PT at home daily.  The weather seems to effect the pain level. 

Here are Lila's tiny feet with my hands holding them.  Allen didn't get a clear pic.  But the hospital is going to make it clearer and frame it.  She's in Heaven but those feet melt my heart.  :(

image.jpg

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Update on Lily... She has IVH (hemmoraging) in her brain.  It's moderate at this point.  Her Oxygen stats are down and she's struggling too much so she's back on the breathing machine.  If later this evening the IVH looks any worse she will go into surgery which her sissy Lila had right before her passing Sunday.  

Please please keep Lily in your fervent thoughts prayers or whatever you believe in.  Thank you.  

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Butch, do keep us posted of any changes.  I have prayer meeting tonight and we'll pray for Lily.

 

Lila's little feet are so precious.

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Yes Lila's tiny footprints have been monumentally imprinted on this Grampy's heart as well as many other people.  

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Butch,

Our family here, as well as your Forum Family, are praying fervently for you and your family ~ and especially for precious little  Lily.  I'm partial to the name Lily, for it was my mother's name.

Carrie

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

It is sweet. both the name and the tiny feet.  You're in our hearts.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Lily is currently in surgery for IVH.  Hemorrhage in the brain. The same procedure Lila had Sunday before she passed.  I'm home with the boys.  Lily is a fighter. She has to pull through this.  She has spunk and spirit already.  She's going to be our family's rainbow baby girl.  I have faith.  (I think).  

Thank you you all for your thoughts prayers etc...   

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Carrie,

katie started calling her Lily from the start even though her name is Lilian. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Dear Butch,

You and your family are in my prayers this morning.  You are special to us, and Lily has grabbed all of our hearts.  She is little, yet has touched many hearts.  May our Lord hold each of you, and give you courage, strength, and stamina.

Blessings and warm hugs,

Carrie

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Sadly my second granddaughter Lilian Mary followed her twin sister Lila Beth to Heaven to be with their Grammy. Lila fought for six days and Lily fought almost seventeen days.  They weren't supposed to be born yet at 24weeks yet they have lived on this earth and passed to Heaven in a whirlwind.  My heart breaks for my son and DIL.  There is no comfort I can possibly offer them other than the knowledge that Mary and I lost two babies stillborn when our son was young.  I know my son needs his Mother now, and it crushes me that she isn't here to comfort him.   The only comfort in all this is the girls are with Mary and our own two babies.  

I thank you for all the prayers for both girls.  They were not forsaken.  My boy thanks everyone who has prayed.  My grandsons know both of their sisters are in Heaven but they don't understand why.  We adults don't even understand why.  
I'm lost for any more words right now... 
Butch

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My dear Butch, you're at a loss for words because at a time like this there are no words. I am so very, very sorry. Please know that you and your family are in our hearts, in our thoughts, and certainly in our prayers. I hope you can feel our collective arms around you, embracing you with our love . . .

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thinking of you, dear friend, wishing there were some way I could ease your sorrow and that of your family.  (((hugs)))

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

We are here with you, Butch. We have learned that it is easier to get through these very sad times when we are surrounded by others.

Words do not comfort at this time but know that you are not alone. We are here for you. 

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Dear Butch,

You are in our hearts and prayers.  Our love and compassion, caring and concern all go with you each moment.  

Namaste,

fae

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Dear Butch,

Our hearts go out to you and to your precious family.   All of us here care deeply.  Our thoughts and prayers are with you.  Nothing I try to say seems right.  Just know we will be praying for all of you.  As Marty said, feel our collective arms around you.

Carrie

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I miss my tiny granddaughters more than words.   I thank God for my two grandsons.  

The other day Allen and Katie took a HPT and it came up positive.  She sees the OBGYN on the 9th for confirmation.  I didn't expect they would be trying so soon.  Not that I wouldn't be overjoyed at a new grand child.  I just hope they aren't trying to replace the girl... Who obviously are irreplaceable.  

I wish my wife were here to be apart of all of these ups and downs.  Though I know she's holding Lila and Lily in her arms in heaven.  

Butch

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Butch,

My heart goes out to you as you make this announcement.  I know it was hard for you.  I'm sure you're feeling cautiously optimistic but it will be hard to allow yourself to feel too much because of the previous losses, out of fear of yet another loss.  As time goes by and things go well, you will begin to relax with it.

I'm also sure that Katie and Allen realize this new life she is carrying will not be a replacement for the ones they've lost.  They want another child and my prayers are with you all that this one is healthy and strong.  Yes, your Mary is taking care of the little ones, it's reassuring to know that.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.


×
×
  • Create New...