What Do You Miss ?

[niamh]

I just thought I'd write this here to share with you some of the things I miss about my Dad. These are just some of the things I miss so much and I just can't tell anyone in person how much I miss them,it's too painful. I'd love to here from any of you dear friends if you can do it.

Anyways, gives you a little insight into me and my Daddy so thanks for reading

I miss hearing him in the mornings, getting his heart tablets together outside my bedroom door.

I miss hearing the front door opening every morning when he’d go out to work, now I’m first up to unlock it all

I miss the happiness I would have in the evenings as he came in the door from work,looking forward to our chats, knowing I could vent about my day, he would always say the right thing. I looked forward to seeing him every single day.

I miss him taking my side when work p’s me off, telling me how proud he is of me, stopping me from doubting myself.

I miss the phonecalls to me at work, looking for tech support for his computer. I used to get impatient and frustarted, now I would give anything for one of those calls.

I miss the phonecall or email on a Thursday afternoon asking what I would like from the chipper for dinner. If it was a phone call we would have little codes because neither wanted to say chicken, chips, curry etc out loud in our offices .

I miss the little notes he would leave me when they were going away for a weekend. Notes to let me know there was some of my favourite cakes in the fridge, fresh bread and fresh meat there for my lunch, always ending in “love Dad”

I miss our trips to McDonalds, he would so often come into me look at me smirking saying “would you”, that was all he had to say becaue we both knew what it meant and we would laugh and scoot off to McDs for a burger and always have amazing chats in the car.

I miss our chats at the dinner table every evening, discussing work, discussing funny jokes we had sent on email, explaining them to Mom.....trying to explain them *L*

I miss him asking me to buy more books for him. I miss him telling me about a really good book.

I miss planning holidays with him, making plans for every day , where to go, what to see, how long to spend somewhere, planning

I will forever miss his excitement when going on holidays, ESPECIALLY New York. Last time we went in October 2009, he could hardly sleep and was up and ready to drive to airport just as I came home from a night out around 3am . He was like a kid at Christmas when going on holidays, so happy, so excited.

I will miss walking the streets of New York for hours on end on vacation,just taking it all in, grabbing a starbucks here and there (me only!!) I will miss our long drives around USA, the little “arguments” we would have because I took a wrong turn or he told me too late to turn and I would panic about getting lost not knowing my way (sat nav came years later !!) . But he always calmed me and we would laugh so much. How will I ever get on a plane again let alone a plane to USA.

I miss his scent around the house, seeing his coats, ties around the place.

I miss planning with him what to get Mom for birthdays,Christmas etc.

I miss hearing football, snooker or tennis on tv. I miss him asking me if he can use “my tv room” to watch some special sports event. He could have it for keeps if he could come home to us.

I miss saying good night to him every night, more over I miss him saying good night back to me.

I JUST PLAIN MISS HIM

[STARKISS]

What I miss about my mom,

I miss her smiling face every day when I wake up in the morning,

I miss her good night hugs at bedtime,

I miss our little talks about what happen in our day,

I miss her stories and tales,

I miss that she was the only one who really understood me,

I miss her so very much

I love you mom

shelley

[loulou]

WHAT I MISS ABOUT DAD.... his nicknames for everyone,and everything . his outlook.When it would rain and be crappy out he would always say"good day for the ducks"

.... I miss his loyalty.He would always take my side.... I miss his voice,his smell.... I miss his phone calls,even if I didn't answer,I miss seeing"dad"on my phone 12 times a day... I miss him watching sports,hearing him yell and scream at the tv.... I miss his stories,he had a endless supply of funny stories.... I miss his big brown eye's,even though I can see them in the mirror.... I miss his noises he would make at animals(sounds weird I know)... I miss his young spirit,wearing air-jordans and listening to rap:wacko:..... I miss his love for the buckeyes....I miss his love for me....I miss the things we shared a love for,white choclate mochas,reality shows(survivor,big brother),classic rock.....I cant go on,because I'm crying too hard....I miss you,dad.

[2sweetgirls]

Well, here is what I miss about mom....

I miss her loving arms wrapped around me.

I miss the huge smile on her face when she opened the door when my family and I came to visit.

I miss the "sparkle" in her eye when she looked at me and my girls.

I miss the words of encouragement when I was having a bad day or just felt that I couldn't do it (especially motherhood).

I miss her voice saying "Hi Sweety" when she answered the phone and knew it was me.

I miss her bubbly, infectious laugh especially at her grandchildren.

I miss her strong spirit and spunkiness.

I miss hearing the ice cubes hitting the glass before she filled it with water.

Plainly said..........

I miss YOU, mommy!!!!!

[jodo]

Hi Niam, What a wonderful topic you've started, I love it ! I enjoyed reading everyones posts ( Hi Everyone !) , Unfortunately I'm having a REALLY hard time tonight, and now after reading everyones beautiful entries, tears are streaming down my face and I can barely write at all , so perhaps tomorrow I can add my post ! There's SO much I miss about my Dad and everyday I find more and more things. (which has been making things even more difficult lately ) I've missed talking to you all lately, but you all are always in my thoughts. Love you guys ! Jodi

[Chai]

Hello beautiful people,

I shall contribute, even though...this is tough. All of your posts are so loving and beautiful, it is wonderful to read them, even if tears are streaming down all our faces...

I miss my dad's crazy laugh when he found something very funny

I miss warning him or getting scared when he would drive terribly

I miss talking about books and movies and friends and problems with my mom and everything, just everything!

I miss seeing him in his plaid shirts, and seeing him dressed up in his best for festivals

I miss hearing his horse-puffing sound when he was dancing around packing things in the car for our hike and picnic

I miss his pointing out beautiful things on our hikes together - and I miss our hikes together!

I miss his advice on things when I got sick; I didn't pay attention much then, but I'd give anything for some dandelion root or something now

I miss his "Let's m-m-m-mosey on!"

I miss his making sure I had socks and good shoes before we left for a hike

I miss, even, waiting hours for him to show up!

I miss hugs, so much

I miss him talking about his "longjohns" in the winter and laughing with me when I'd laugh

I miss visiting him and getting our bedrolls out for bed, and knowing when I went to bed that he was an arm's length away

I miss his singing and dancing around the kitchen, and his smile while he prepared fruit plates for me, grandma and him

Ahh, there's too much! I could go on and on...gosh I miss him...it's so strange still, sometimes, that he's not here. So much lightness and serenity and happiness is gone now that he's not here anymore.

Glad to have contributed....

take care all,

Chai

[Daughter2010]

This is a great topic, there is so much I miss about my dad...here it goes:

- I miss him always asking me about my car, and wanting to take care of it. He was always giving me guidelines on what to do about tires and stuff.

- I miss his warnings about crossing the street without holding his hand (I was 6yrs old at the time)

- I miss him wanting to take the family on mini-vacations right after the holidays.

- I miss his kiss on my forehead before going to bed (even as a grown up...yes I know :-))

- I miss his mischievous laugh ( it was a really funny, contagious laugh).

- I miss him giving me advise, he was sooo wise. Always a calm person, and very smart about how to deal with difficult people.

- I miss he would take my and my brother to get milkshakes and french fries to this particular place when we were kids.

- I miss his generosity not with money but with people in general.

- I miss talking to him on the phone and asking him about his day.

- I miss him giving me stuffed animals so I could take care of them (what can I say, I felt like a kid even as a grown up).

- I miss him picking me up at the airport when I come home.

- I miss his beautiful hazel eyes, they said so much without him say a single word.

- I miss him teaching me to ride my first bike.

- I miss him walking home with me from work.

- I miss him referring to his family during sporting events or when he would give speeches.

- I miss him calling me by my nickname

- I miss him taking my brothers and I to the flower shop to get my mom beautiful flowers.

- I miss him taking us on road trips to small towns and teach us about their history.

- I miss him telling me about his night school and what he learned there.

- I miss seeing him wear cool, modern Dad clothes :-)

- I miss talking to him on the car when he was driving.

- I miss seeing him listen to sport races on his mini-radio.

There is soooo much I miss about my father. He was so precious and so dear to me. There is more I miss from him, but now I have tears rolling down my face. Thanks for coming up with this topic, it brought up so many great memories, Daddy I love you!

- L

[niamh]

WOW, thank you all so much for sharing. Each of our Dads and Moms are just so amazing, IT'S JUST NOT FAIR trying to live without so much, it's just so hard and so unreal!

I just hope there's a little get together going on somewhere with our Dads and Moms laughing and joking and chatting about us all and I just can't wait to be part of it someday.

lots of love and hugs to you all

niamh

xox

[ChristineK]

I miss the phone calls in the middle of the night – “it’s me are you awake” no “okay go back to sleep”

I miss her accent on over-enunciating words in French.

I miss her witty sense of humour. (and giggling together on jokes that went over everyone else’s head)

I miss her puns.

I miss red delicious apples.

I miss clam chowder.

I miss her little sticky note reminders.

I miss holding hands.

I miss speaking freely to her about my day, my life.

I miss combing her hair.

I miss trying to decipher her grocery lists – “put your elbows on the table. Put your thumbs and fingers together to form a ball. Got it? Now, this is the size of the cabbage I want you to buy”

I miss her showing up at my door.

I miss taking the afternoon off so we could sit on my patio and have a beer – “ah now I can finally relax” when of course she was retired.

I miss our secret shorthand no one could understand but us.

I miss sneaking away to Moskovitz and Moskowitz.

I miss girl breakfasts.

I miss her so much.

Thanks,

Christine

[loulou]

Christine,that was beautiful.I'm sorry for your pain.For all of our pain.I'm having a hard time posting right now.I read and feel for every single post.My thoughts are with you,and all the people here.

[niamh]

thanks for sharing Christine, your Mom sounds so amazing and I'm sorry for all our pain like loulou said

wednesday hugs to everyone!

niamh

xo

[niamh]

I just wanted to bump this thread if anyone would like to share something about their Mom, Dad, Grandma, Grandpa or whoever.

Here's some more from me and my dearest Dad

I miss laughing with him so much

I miss him coming home from work joking around with my Mom

I miss seeing him in the room sitting across from Mom just watching tv together.

I miss family dinners out at our fav restaurants.

I miss him telling me off for something !

I miss his ability to FIX everything

I miss our ritual saturday lunches

I miss him taking my leftovers from certain food.

I miss seeing him sitting at the kitchen table reading the sunday newspaper

I miss seeing him get excited about things and just being like a kid in a toy store.

I miss his kindness and genorosity towards others

I miss his never ending encouragement

and the list goes on.

Would love to hear about other's Moms, Dads and so on if you can write about it.

Niamh

[Babypod]

What a great topic! The things I miss about my Grandma. .

-The sound of her quick feet shuffling across the floor as she walked.

-The little songs she would sing as she worked

-the feel of her hands

-The smell of her hair

-The sound of her eating

-Her excitement over little things - first robin of the season, the way the snow looked on the trees, when she would hear her canned goods pop after canning them

-Her cooking - she really could cook

-The way she would "spank" her groceries when she put them away.

-How she made everything special

-Her daily phone calls - sometimes several times a day sometimes. I regret all the times I didn't pick up the phone.

-Her morning wake up calls at 5:30 - even on those days I didn't have to work. "It is 5:30, do you want me to call you back in 10 minutes?" I can still hear her - she would even whisper it - afraid that somehow if her voice was higher she would wake up others around the house.

-The sound of her clicking her teeth as she worked.

-The way her face would light up when she saw me

-The sound of her laughter

-The way she made everything fun and special - vacuuming the floor would be fun with her chasing me with the vacuum around the living room, the way we would count cars while waiting for my mom to come and get me, eating corn on the cob became a race to see who finished their corn first

-The knowledge that she would do anything for me - no matter how embarrassing. She would happily order me a slush at the ice cream store - even though she couldn't say the word slush.

-The way she made me feel when I would do things for her. I loved buying her groceries, talking her out to eat, the one time we could purchase her that refrigerator. I wish we could have done more for she was such a joy to do things for.

-The "Just a minute" when I would knock on her door that would come from the inside of her home before she could open it.

-The way she would talk to herself as she worked. She always said, "Grandpa said as long as I don't answer myself back that I am fine."

-The way she would listen with when people talked to her - on the phone or in person. She was always 100% present - never distracted. Dinner could burn on the stove when she was talking to you but she was still 100% listening.

-How she cared about people. She cared and loved everyone.

-How she always stood up for her family. People could treat her like she was "nothing" - and people who didn't know her did treat her poorly - and she never stood up for herself, but do something to hurt one of her kids or Grandkids and watch out - she was a true momma Grizzly!

-The noises she made when she was listening when you spoke. The "ahhhh" and "ohhhh"

-Man - I miss everything about her. . . .

[Guest Nicholas]

What is strange is that I miss the things I don't miss, if that makes sense! Or, rather, I miss the things I didn't enjoy doing:

No longer having to do (and re-do) his washing up

No longer having to clean the floor and carpet after his rice, noodles and chillies went everywhere

No longer having to clean the bath and toilet and to remind him to close the toilet seat

No longer having to ensure he had shut the fridge door

No longer having to make sure that when he went out he remembered his keys, money and phone

No longer having to buy his sticky rice

No longer having to wash and dry his clothes

No longer having to worry about the massive phone bills to Thailand, and so many other things besides,

but, most of all, no longer having to worry about him.

RIP Thanomsil

xxxx

[niamh]

Your Grandma sounds like such a doll Babypod,your post reminds me too of my Dads Mom who I was very close to.

Yep Nicholas it makes complete sense,as well as all the good things I miss the silly things that used to annoy me,now I'd give anything for a lifetime of them.Your son sounds like a typical lad and you were a super Dad by the looks of it!

As time goes on I find I miss the "oddest"'of things like what Dads hands looked like,how he walked etc.

Thanks for sharing

Niamh

[Babypod]

Niamh - your memories are bringing back more of my own. The kitchen table one expecially!!!! Thank you so much for doing this post!

Nicholas - totally understand. I miss wiping the drool off Grandma's chin (in the end she had a hard time with drooling). I miss helping her go to the bathroom. I miss helping her up into my van. I miss making her food. So much to miss.

Bless each and every one of you here. I am so glad I found this site.

Angel

[Guest Nicholas]

I forgot to say that I miss reminding my son to take his medication; it is too late to remind him now and, in the end, it didn't help anyway.

[niamh]

that's a beautiful photo of your son Nicholas, such gorgeous dogs too !

[Guest Nicholas]

Thank you so much, that photo was taken in Scotland in the early 1990s, my sister had a farm in the Scottish borders and those were her two labradors. My son adored animals and was always feeding them in the park right up till the end, especially the ducks, geese and squirrels. Now his partner goes to the park every day in case the animals are missing my son and feeds them.

[Guest Nicholas]

Agnetha co-wrote this early song with Bjorn:

Very poignant and appropriate.

Enjoy.

Nicholas

[niamh]

I miss...

I miss going to Wal-Mart and shopping with her and us acting like kids buying sweets and snacks and thing we didn't need...

thanks for sharing kawaiinicole, this one reminds me so much and my Dad & me too. I didn't go shopping often as an adult with them but every so often when I would go my Dad & I would sneak lots of snacks into the trolley when Mom wasn't looking, always laughing and joking.

oh how I long for those normal days with Dad,

((hugs))

N

[niamh]

Agnetha co-wrote this early song with Bjorn:

Very poignant and appropriate.

Enjoy.

Nicholas

absolutely beautfiul song Nicholas, never heard it before (& I LOVE ABBA!!), the words are so perfect. thanks for sharing

N

[MartyT]

Nicholas, it is a beautiful song indeed. Would you consider adding it to our list of listener-recommended songs on the Grief Songs Web page? Once on the site, scroll down to the end of the page until you see the Leave a Reply box, and fill in the spaces there. (It is not necessary to include a Website address; you can leave that space blank.) Then fill in the title of your song, the artist's name, and the link. You can include any comments you'd like to make as well.

[nanasbaby]

I miss everything about my mom. EVERYTHING. I miss hearing her voice. Her southern accent even though she lived in NYC for well over 50 years of her life. I miss her cooking. I miss racing through the door and smothering her in kisses. I miss her getting mad at me for missing her call. I miss her playing with the girls. I miss her compliments. I miss her being with my father every moment of every day. Her beautiful face.