Mom's angel Posted April 8, 2016 Report Share Posted April 8, 2016 In the beginning I used to watch sad songs or songs that directly hit me And I used to cry with that, I don't know if it sounds weird but it kind of let my emotions flow But Now I don't listen to songs that can directly relate to my situation or songs that are about separation.. Now I just listen to songs that does not relate to me.. I loved to watch horror films but now I don't even like the concept of ghost, I only believe in angels. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scba Posted April 8, 2016 Report Share Posted April 8, 2016 I join this club. Me and my BF have totally different taste on music/films/tv. these were not things we shared. I'm not a fan of films, and he loved them. The same with music, I like pop songs, but random songs. He instead had 3-4 singers he followed. Tv series, example I watched Gilmore girls and he disliked Lorelai and Rory!! These three items were not a source of union and it was fine. Well, to me was fine, maybe he wanted more than me to like his films and music, but he always let me win when it was time to choose what to watch. You know, girls can behave like spoiled brats. I was not mature in that. I needed more years, I was learning to be in a couple. My training was declared concluded. I will never learn more, it is what it is. In my bad days I regret not having put more effort on liking his music or watching more films. However, since he died, I cannot watch nor listen to my music, his music, my shows, his shows, anything related with that time. Perhaps I can listen to some pop songs, but some. Tv shows were cut, I didn't finish the Gilmore series, now it hurts to watch it. I rewrote my tv guide. I watch news channels mostly. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted April 8, 2016 Report Share Posted April 8, 2016 2 hours ago, scba said: example I watched Gilmore girls and he disliked Lorelai and Rory!! This was us - Deedo loved Gilmore Girls and Parenthood and Lauren Grahams characters have always made me nuts: so needy! Music was more of a distractor for Deedo and myself as we were constantly talking and music simply was background sound. Movies, we both loved, especially romantic comedies and feel good movies; not so much adventure/horror/scci-fi genres. There were a few TV shows we could get into but I found that list shrinking over the years; soon I'll drop my cable since there is so little I watch anymore, nothing is of interest. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Margm Posted April 8, 2016 Report Share Posted April 8, 2016 There was one show Billy loved (lots of westerns, mountain men, and early America shows of the west.) When this show on AMC went on a long time between the dynamic conclusion and months later was to begin again, he wondered why they made us wait so long. He was not sick (that we were aware of) when it took its time off. He was not alive, if and when it begins again. Cannot remember the name. Conveniently forgot. Do not care to remember. Something about the Union Pacific Railroad making it to the coast. Rather brutal show. Never care to watch it again. Funny I can remember the lead character was Anson Mount, I think that was his name. Don't even care to watch anything he is in. Know it was not his fault, know the show did not hurt Billy on purpose. Know also that Billy probably forgot about the show. I did not though. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hollowheart Posted April 8, 2016 Report Share Posted April 8, 2016 3 hours ago, scba said: example I watched Gilmore girls and he disliked Lorelai and Rory!! Ahaha! I loved Gilmore Girls too. They just recently started running the re-runs because I think they might have a reunion or something. I've been watching the re-runs when I catch them. I almost bought the box-set but changed my mind. But I also agree about TV shows because my sister and I loved a lot of the same ones and there are about 10 that I have yet to finish the seasons and that does sadden me because that's just one more fun thing I liked that has to be cut out of my life continuing to make my life even more miserable than it already is. My thing with TV was that it was broken up with hanging out with her, so now without her it's like all I can do now is watch show after show and I'm not that kind of TV Zombie. I like interacting with people after a while. We loved horror movies, and the fun thing was watching together, being worried for the characters, hoping they survive, being scared. We especially loved graphic deaths/horror like Saw type of movies. Now I can't go "Oh my god! Did you see that?!" to anyone but myself. *sigh* 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gwenivere Posted April 9, 2016 Author Report Share Posted April 9, 2016 There is not one moment Steve is not on my mind. It's so hard being in love all by yourself. 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brat#2 Posted April 9, 2016 Report Share Posted April 9, 2016 Oh Gwen, you got that so right. Being in love all by yourself is heart wrenching. I just keep trying to tell myself that he is still in love with me, but without that actual confirmation it is difficult, but I will always be in love and love him. Joyce 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gwenivere Posted April 9, 2016 Author Report Share Posted April 9, 2016 The kicker in this was when I was young and thought was, and maybe I was at the time, in love, the person had not totally 'infiltrated' my life. I didn't see them everywhere I turned and in every thing I am surrounded with like in my home. You could yearn for them, show up places they were to see them be it to get together or from afar. You may have even said the words I love you to each other. But this is so totally different. We really found IT and now it is gone. Can't even get mad they left, maybe found someone else or took solace you broke it off for a good reason or another 'love' caught your eye. Basically, I didn't know what love was til I found him. Then I was in for the long haul, even at times I wished I could be that person that moved in when it got tough. But that proved love too. Easy outs were not an option because losing him would have killed me. And nowit has happened for real. And kill me inside it has done. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brat#2 Posted April 9, 2016 Report Share Posted April 9, 2016 I know Gwen, I didn't know what love was either until I found Dale. When we were young, everything didn't surround us where ever we went the reminders of that love. We had our hard times too, but worked them out and stuck together making our love and support and friendship that much stronger, which makes it that much harder now that we don't have it anymore. I hope for some peace for both of us and all of us. Joyce 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scba Posted April 9, 2016 Report Share Posted April 9, 2016 I know Gwen, you wrote what I could have wrote. I understand. Have you rdceived the book? What do you think so far? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gwenivere Posted April 10, 2016 Author Report Share Posted April 10, 2016 I just got the book, Ana. I read the forward and think this is going to be a heck of a book! I'm so impressed that little bit of it. It's so true what they say.......you think the dying is the worst, but then they stay dead. THAT is so much worse. One horrible experience that starts a journey of intense and never ending pain, even when time creates larger and larger distances. The book Ana recommended is.... About Grief by Ron Marasco and Brian Shuff For you, Ana............? 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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