KarenK

Gwen, I'm so sorry things did not go your way. It must be very difficult to fight an insurance company even when you are in the right. Fingers crossed that you can get the home health. Take care

I guess it just isn't feasible, but I'm a bit surprised that your surgeon has not come to evaluate you or at least sent an associate knowing how difficult it is for you to come to him and how badly things are progressing. I wonder at what point today's doctors forget "First do no harm".

Dee, so good to hear from you. I confess I would have no trouble at all moving to the country. It sounds wonderful. So glad your eyes are doing really well. I have lost confidence in driving as I still have double vision in my left eye when turning my head left. Doesn't bother me watching tv unless my eyes are really tired. Fortunately I don't really need to go anywhere except medical stuff and haircuts, so I schedule around my son's days off. I'm sure my life is more boring than yours. lol Being numb describes it well. Take care

I'm still around, just haven't had much of importance to add to the conversations. Just feeling a bit burnt out on life, I guess. A few days ago was what would have been my daughter's 58th birthday. Hard to believe that I had a child so long ago and now she is gone and I am still here. It's frightening that most of my life is over. I'm nowhere near ready to exit yet. Gwen, hope you find a way to be comfortable at home if fate sends you there. You won't be completely alone with home health coming in and Dee will be nearby, if not living there. Life is full of adapting as you well know. Not much we can do about it. Sad to see more new folks here, but glad they found their way to us. For me, time has been the greatest healer, I guess. Looking at around 113 here. It's a blast furnace out there. No AC would mean death. Saw a news article about UPS drivers here passing out on porches from heat. No AC in their delivery trucks. Have also been wondering about Dee, Gin, and Marg. Hope they check in.

Well gee Gwen, did you have a good time on your secret run to the casino? lol Seriously, yours is the stuff of nightmares! Hope you have fun at bingo.

Gwen, do you have an attorney to help you with any of this stuff? You can bet the insurance company does! Hoping for positive results for you on the court call.

Gwen, what reason does your surgeon give for the fact that you're getting worse? What about the continued pain? I thought the surgery was supposed to alleviate that. What was the point of all the suffering just to end up worse off. Someone has to have the answers.

I think medical/insurance procedures are changing everywhere and we patients are none the wiser. For the first time ever, last month when I went to the doctor for a refill visit, I had to give my insurance cards to the phlebotomist and sign forms for the bloodwork. He also told me that one of the tests wasn't covered by insurance. I refused the test, just as I refuse mammograms, colonoscopies, bone tests, flu shots, shingles shots and whatever else they come up with. If it ain't broke, don't fix it. All I care about is my BP, so I don't have a stroke. I have a feeling that doctors get a kickback or a gold star for every little procedure they schedule.

I just assumed(dangerous to do, I know) that PT did visits like home health. Maybe they don't and you'd have to travel. As for distance walking, you may have to wear a path in the floor walking back and forth. Not funny, I know. I can see how all this is driving you nuts. There's just so many parts to all of it. Glad you got some bingo time in. I've been watching a few episodes of "Little House" each night. Brings a small sense of normalcy to these chaotic times.

Gwen, I'm beginning to think you'd be no worse off at home. Sure, you might have to rearrange things a bit to accommodate your needs, but that may be only temporary. Rehab is doing nothing for you except causing more stress, no therapy, missed medicines, screwed up meals, hygiene when they get around to it, all at a huge price, I'm sure. At least at home, you could control your own life, set up your own home health, therapy, and better food. Unless of course, rehab wakes up and starts doing a much better job paid for by insurance. All of this is just my opinion, so take it with a grain of salt.

Kay, thinking of you today. What a nice picture of George😊

I definitely understand the "running". The problem is that you can't outrun yourself. When my dad died, my mother and I were devastated. I didn't recognize it for what it was at the time, but she started " running". She visited every relative nationwide that she could find. She took a trip to Europe with a cousin of mine. She'd stay till all hours at her office just to avoid going home. We never talked about his death or how she felt. I really don't know why and I feel bad about that. I guess I couldn't understand until Ron died. I know your "running" took you on a lot of shopping trips for things you didn't need.😄 Unfortunately, mine took me to too many casinos to lose money that I couldn't afford. Hope you get some better meals. I wonder if they could bring you milkshakes for weight gain(if you like them).

Hope the guy was young and handsome😄 Just kidding!!!! Seriously, they need to keep an eye on him. That must have been so scary for you. I guess you'll just have to trust(there's that word again) that all the billing people have their ducks in a row. At least your Medicare and Premera statements will tell you what's going on. Hope your weekend goes better. HUGS!!!!

I sure don't understand how your insurance works. Where does your Medicare stand in all of this? They should be your primary carrier. It seems your appeal should have been filed there first. I know they pay for 100 days in a rehab center, but have no idea how many PT visits they pay for. I thought Medicare was the same for everyone, but maybe it varies from state to state.

Gwen, it's no wonder you can barely tell if you are coming or going, what with all the med changes. Your system must be totally confused. Don't beat yourself up about the pain meds. There's not a whole lot of choice when you're in severe pain. I know there is pain management help, but it usually happens down the road after you have healed. Has PT for your back been completely stopped? Anyone with half a brain could see how necessary it is. They probably focus only on your other issues because it's an easy out for them. All they have to do is give you another pill.

Gwen, I guess I meant if you end up paying for this yourself, you might as well be somewhere that is really helping you. I know....much easier said than done. I just want so badly for someone to listen to you and help. I'm sure you must feel so abandoned.

I saw on the news that Ann Turner Cook has passed away. She was the original Gerber baby. I didn't know her except through emails, but she was my second cousin. Our grandmothers were sisters. May she rest in peace.

I know you don't like the idea of moving, but have you ever considered that a different rehab place might be better for you. Obviously the place you're in is not helping you in any way.

I've never really been alone my entire life except for about a years time after Ron died. I went from being a teen to being a wife and mother at 17. About the time Debbie was mostly raised, I had Robert. Then my grandson, David came along when Robert was 16. I was always raising kids, it seems. After Debbie died, David(now grown) moved in with me and eventually my son did. Not sure I'd know how to act if I was alone and not taking care of someone in one way or another. I think it's great that Dee is receptive to bringing Mel home. Dogs don't really require a lot, just food, water, and outside access to go potty. Vet and grooming trips should be few and far between. Think of the love Mel would give and receive. Still, I know it's a tough decision. I'd try the roommate thing for a while first though. I'm seeing more shows available on Paramount+ that I would like to see, but just hate adding more cost to my cable. Peacock is free with my cable and has started showing some of the newer movies. I'm sure one day "free" will go away. Nothing good lasts forever.

I'm not sure I could have a roommate who cared for me in a romantic way when I didn't return those feelings. It would definitely create tension. I hope the two of you have worked that part out. You certainly don't need any more stress. Nothing happening here this weekend. I sure miss those times going fishing or just driving around in the forest. Hope your insurance company's decision is in your favor and that you can finally get some help.

Gwen, I hope with all my heart that you and Dee can work out acceptable living arrangements. Maybe she could help you with Mel so she could come home. I know how much this would mean to you. How is Mel doing since her surgery?

Just rambling here...As I get older, my mind drifts back to fun times as a kid. When we lived in Colter Bay, Wy., my dad tended bar at the "Tap Room"(beer only) one summer. That in itself was funny as he was a total non drinker, but working for the Grand Teton Lodge Company, you took whatever job was available. Next door was a little restaurant that sold ice cream. I used to love a scoop of chocolate with marshmallow cream. Hadn't had any in more years than I care to count, so bought some this week. It's just not the same. Of course, I'm not quite the same either. Oh, well😂

A couple of weeks ago, you mentioned that you were going home on the 14th. You also said that financially you could stay an additional 2 weeks, if necessary. Have you decided to stay? It sure doesn't seem like you're getting much help there anymore. Hope things are working out with Dee so that she can stay with you, if even for a limited time.

I received a nice surprise today. My neighbor and her daughter brought me a box of blueberry muffins and a vase of flowers for Mother's Day. Really unexpected. They are a nice family, although we don't speak very often. She is very busy taking care of 4 kids and church activities. Got a "Happy Mother's Day" wish from my son. Will always miss those phone calls from my daughter.

V, Nine years ago on May 5, my world imploded as I watched my husband take his final breath. It seems like only yesterday. It seems a million years ago. The following year, my destruction was complete as I watched my precious daughter die. And yet, I am still here plodding along, albeit more slowly. There is light at the end of the tunnel, if only a glimmer that you can't quite see just yet. My heart is with you.