Margm

Actually our "insurance man" had been a Green Beret also. We did not follow him all the years, but he admitted to having violence as a partner. I feel for his family and all the young men who hid in the hills and mountains because of the unwelcome coming home experience. This man had been a good man (in the book), but glad the mother protected her child.

Karen, I think you recommended a book to me. I read "The Great Alone" by Kristin Hannah last month and enjoyed it very much. It was sad, then happy, sad and finally a bitter happiness. It reminded me of a man we met when we lived in Texas. He was an insurance salesman and had just returned from the Vietnam war. He admitted to us that his wife would wake him at night because he was attacking her. The man in this book had been a prisoner of war for many years and his little brain was turned to mush. I felt so sorry for the family, and just like a mad dog, the time came when he had to be put out of their misery. So sorry for our Vietnam veterans who came back to a country that had turned against them for fighting in a war they were made to go fight by the thing called "the draft." We met some of these veterans in our RV travels and we as a nation did them such an injustice. It brought to mind a quote by Edward Abbey: “The tragedy of modern war is that the young men die fighting each other - instead of their real enemies back home in the capitals.”

Well, right now, I'm not sure how much better my vision is. I have been driving w/o any trouble for years. After Billy passed, I got a new pair of glasses and because his glasses were relatively new, I wanted to use his frames. They told me I had the beginning of cataracts then. That was some over eight years ago. I am a reader. I read eight books in January alone. With my Kindle at its largest lettering, I was having no trouble. But, in my mind, I figured it "was time." I have the (can't think of the name) vision loss to blindness in my family. An aunt went blind, but was in her 90's. Night driving quit over eight years ago. If I had the lines on the roads, I was okay. Louisiana is not known for their great roads. But seeing oncoming cars lights bothered me, so I quit driving at night. Still, no trouble during the day. In my mind though, my greatest fear was being unable to read, so I went to two ophthalmologists. The first one was over 73 years old. The service was terrible, and I am a very patient (patient). I am always nice to the service people, but five hours was entirely too much time to wait for service when I was the only patient. I called Medicare, the main provider, and they said it was my right to go for a "second opinion." When I was a transcriptionist, I typed more than one Dr. Lusk. Now, the sons are ophthalmologists also, and I got one of the youngest. We also have an office here where I live for the follow-ups. The drive to their own hospital is almost like going to Texas, going through two busy interstates to south Shreveport. Kelli (who has too many health problems to mention) was determined she was going to take her Mama. She did, both times. She drives in Shreveport all the time, I can, but I sure do not like to. Long story. I love writing long stories. I actually do not know if I can see better yet. I'm still using the drops 3 times a day (two different kind). I wear the dark glasses if I go outside. I suspect there is still some swelling. The first surgery right eye was a breeze, but I am a "wuz" and kept telling them I was still nervous (wanting IV drugs). They do not give you the IV until the doctor walks in the room. I saw beautiful lights, felt nothing, never felt like I was "out" at any time, but they slosh your eyes with so many liquids, you know they are deadened. Beautiful lights. They put a sticky mask on one side of your face with eye part exposed. This may just be the method these/this doctors use. My left eye supposedly had a much denser cataract. I was aware of what he was doing and still no pain, but the lights were not as pretty. And once he told me about a stick that might hurt, it didn't. So, I didn't have as good a time with my second. But can I see better? Because of the numerous drops, I really cannot tell. My friend last night said she had just undergone laser surgery because hers had grown back after about 10-11 years. (I am late in life getting this done). I will tell you after the right eye, the next day I made a 100+ mile round trip driving by myself, with my dark glasses and thought I could see better. I think the swelling just has not gone down in the left eye. I've mentioned before, my grandmother had said if she could not read, she would just as soon die. That is why I had the surgery. They offer different lens put into your eyes for up to $2000+ per eye, understanding your insurance won't cover it. I just wanted the most basic, just to be able to read until it is time to go. Hey, I'm back, I wrote another word salad. Sorry Kevin. Simple answer is I don't know if I can see better yet. I have to use three weeks of drops. I will do it so I can keep driving and reading. I have heard high praise for the surgery. Right now, with the swelling still, I'm glad it is over with.

Oh, we are used to rain. No road closures in North Louisiana but the bayou's are overflowing, just not over the road. I think California is supposed to get a lot of rain too. Just had my 2nd cataract done, lots of bright lights, but no trouble. Don't want anymore snow. Y'all take care.

Winter temperatures changed for massive rain in Louisiana. Now, if it only does not freeze. Too much flooding already, more rain expected. Temperature is 44 right now. Glad your temperatures went up. I'm tired of winter. Warmer temperatures have brought out blooms on fruit trees and others. Not big blooms, these will freeze off.

Weather extremes cause pandemonium in the south. Sharp drops in temperature and then flood rains, very warm temps (today up to 66) can cause tornadoes. One year in the 1970's, down the street from where we lived in the neighborhood of the city, a tornado blew a cinderblock into two little girls' bedroom and took out both of them. I hate fickle weather, wish it would just stay cool. Not freezing.

I'm doing weather like I do politics, trying to ignore. Enough rain to cause flooding in all "streams, creeks, bayous, and rivers". If it freezes, we can ice skate to New Orleans.

One reason I love Louisiana: We had our frigid few days. It has been cold enough that the ice is not gone in some shadowed places. This week we will have rain, temps up to 66 degrees. I might take a shower.

My daughter will take me for the cataract surgeries. Scott is bipolar and would take me, but he hates to get out of his house. Knows he has to make a trip back to his doctor but puts it off. They insist someone go with me on trips, so I usually just don't mention it and then slip off. Around this area, I go by myself or have to carry my sister to all her appointments. I still see fine to drive, except at night. Heck, I read a 400+ page book starting in morning of one day this week and finished at 3:30 a.m. It was one Karen had recommended and was a good one. I've read a seven series group of books; each one was between 300-400 pages and the other book since starting of January. Would rather read than watch TV. Reminds me of my grandmother (not knowing she had cataracts), lived way in the country and the Bookmobile came by her country store. Her vision was bothering her, and she said if she could not read, she'd just as soon be dead. The "city aunt" knew it was cataracts and many years ago they got that taken care of, so she did read up until her death. I always thought it strange, my grandmother, my mom, and me too would start a book and if it was good and had to put it down, we'd read the last chapter (suspense). If the book was good, and they usually are, we'd pick back up where we left off and finish the book. My family do not like to know the ending ahead of time, so we don't do "spoilers" for them. Most do not read though. (Can, but not interested in books.) I'm glad I was born before TV's.

I copied what Kevin said. Sometimes my computer skills are a big zero. Sometimes minus zero. I went to Walmart and have never seen so many people in any season. All the surrounding areas had cabin fever too. Thank goodness my bodily functions behaved themselves for hours. I'm so proud. But I will bring a change of clothes for the cataract removal.

"Woke up to Minus 18 this morning(wind chill minus 26) Good news both vehicles started without an issue...My weathermans credibility has come under question but he is adamant warming big time next four days....supposed to shuffelboard tonight, plan on attending." Well Kevin, if you're brave enough to get out in that kind of weather, then I think I will force myself to take the trash out in 33+ degrees weather (later in the day, will be warmer.) Have to, us two women make more trash than a family of 10.

Oh I have garbage. Bags stacked in entrance hall. Have not been to my car since Sunday. This is not Eugene, Oregon, this is Louisiana. I'm a flatlander. If I make it to summer, I will buy rock salt for the sidewalks. It is overcast, no sun. My daughter and sister are both sick and I need to get outside like I need a broken hip. If this stuff melts, I have to go to store. Just 175 miles up the road is my little Canada, called Arkansas. Glad to get out of those winters. Cannot go to a doctor, urgent care or wait in a waiting room full of sick people in the ER. One connotation of the term (catch 22) is that the creators of the "catch-22" situation have created arbitrary rules in order to justify and conceal their own abuse of power. Sister and daughter both need one of their many doctors. Can't get in. My daughter is on polypharmacy and one is causing a yeast infection in her mouth. I used to think I could move mountains, now I cannot get to my car, and dangerous to drive if I do. Black ice is prevalent.

I shouldn't fuss with all your weather problems. We were warned. It was slow coming, but everything covered with snow, and it is a gray dawn with white probably an inch or more, know how little that is compared to the North's problems. According to news, it is everywhere in the ArkLaTex. Hope we can reschedule my sister's doc appointment tomorrow. Her apartment is in a hollow and you have to climb up and slide down. Going to try to reschedule. The way it is, the staff might not even come in. My sister is a stickler but called me at 11:00 p.m. to give me three appointments I did not have on my calendar. This chemo is tough on her beautiful mind. I am not being sarcastic, it hurts to see this, and what hurts the most is she is aware of it. I am 10 years older than her.

It is 30 here right now. Supposed to get colder and probably ice and snow. We can't have one without the other. Got groceries this morning, gonna just stay in. Maintenance man left note on all the doors to leave water dripping. I did.

If it is dead end, head toward the beginning and take him up main road unless it is a busy highway. A dead end is just that. Walk him around your house 2-3 times. It's tough when you do not have access to walking space in a country lane.

I like that idea. Also new can of wasp spray will hit them directly in the face. We had a pump in the country. I was not a good housekeeper; Billy was not a good home keeper. We matched perfectly. Did w/o electricity for 6-7 days. We had a pond Billy and Scott would slide down the hill to, to get water for the commodes. We had followed a snowplow home (Louisiana girl had never seen a snowplow), this was in small mountains of Arkansas. Billy and Scott both hurt their backs sliding down the hill, and getting back up was hard. It was an ice storm and then a snow storm over that. I did not like playing Jeremiah Johnson. Left as soon as we could. I'm sorry about all the cold. It is 38 here, supposed to get in the 40's. That is cold for us. Kay, I cannot imagine the pain you have to go through picking all the limbs up with your hands all broken up. We had a bad dog once; he was a hunting dog. We used hair spray to ward him off us until he took the can away from me. He was gone soon after. We put him in the house to get the meter's read. Kelli had a new pair of shoes, and he headed right for them and took a poop right in them. She threw them away. He was a Chesapeake Bay retriever and too big for us girls. Billy had shopped and paid a lot for him. He gave him away. They are not supposed to be of that temperament. I think I'd pick another route to walk. Or take a spray with you.

Our apartments were built in the 1970's, I think. Lots of repairs needed, but it got best apartment house in yearly voting in local newspaper. I do know if it breaks, they fix it. It is plenty warm for me, but cold to my granddaughter whose thyroid system is out of whack even with medication. Electric bill was over $80 from the last month's bill. We do what we can, but like I told our maintenance man, if my light goes out, I'm not climbing one of my "Rubbermaid" ladders. He says, "that is why I am here." I think they closed our beautiful, assisted living apartments (I'm sure very expensive,) and the people had to find somewhere else to live. Something about needing many repairs, I think. I feel very lucky I'm not leaving a country that was my home for another country that does not have room or the demands it takes for 10,000 people crossing in a day's time. How terrible their country must have been to walk so far to a place that obviously maybe is a place of more danger. We learn to be thankful for what we have and what we want is out somewhere we cannot go. (I have what I want). Except minus Billy. Puts what we want into a different perspective. I'm warm.

You live in one place all your life, you know how to prepare for it, even tornadoes. Our weather is so iffy it is sweater morning, sleeves afternoon, sweater evening. Y'all try to stay warm. You sure know it better than southern flatlanders.

You and I like pretty much the same kind of books, if I remember correctly. I love reading about "north country" homesteading." (I just ordered it for my Kindle). Thanks. It really gets good reviews. I've had many, many years to get used to my dentures. The bottoms get aggravating sometimes, but I'm not going to break in any others, unless these breaks. Good reading to you. At least we can travel with our imagination.

I tried to leave a picture, I did leave a picture, it was too small to read. I just wanted to WISH YOU ALL A HAPPY NEW YEAR, better than the last.

Well Kevin, I will think of you going through the same thing then. I'm the chauffeur so I have to have good eyes. I've said this so many times. My grandmother loved to read. It kept her alive after my grandfather passed away. I read probably at least seven books a month. At least. My grandmother did not know about such things as cataracts. My "city" aunt took her to the eye doc and got her fixed up for at least another 20 years. She had said "If I can't read, I would just as well be dead." I know how she felt. Y'all keep warm up in that north country. Thanks for the company. Good luck with yours. Your much younger than me, but I've needed it done for a long time. I am totally a coward.

I don't really feel that way. I've just told everyone January (or most of it) is mine. Got to get the eyes fixed or I cannot do anything. I've mentioned this many times before, probably, but an author said something we all know not to be true, his being terminal, he knew it, but it hits home. “Everybody has got to die, but I have always believed an exception would be made in my case.” William Saroyan. And in my case, we are our "brothers" keeper. Especially when she has no one else. Her little apartment has to be cleaned. It has to pass inspection and I realize people who smoke cannot smell cigarette smoke anymore. She is not supposed to be smoking in her apartment. I bought her cigarettes last two weeks and she goes through more than a pack a day. I have someone to clean her apartment, she has done it before and is very meticulous. My sister "fired" her the last time because she "talked too much." A very sweet woman, in her 50's who lost her husband at a younger age. My sister didn't tell her she talked too much but does not want her again. I finally just told her to find someone. A place advertises for $19 and I'm sure that is per hour, but my sister won't be paying for it. The manager likes her, and if she throws her out, I have no idea what I am going to do. I do not have the money to rent her a place and no government homes will accept her. And, she has a cat. I just talked to her, and she took out six bags of trash, she is not worried. Billy always told me if I didn't have something to worry about, I'd hunt until I found it. I miss him. The years are nothing but a holding pattern.

Family problems can really bring down the holidays. We've fought my sister's cancer for 15-16 months now. I bought her car. Did not want to but she needed the money, after the wreck (woman ran stop sign) my car was totaled. Either the chemo or family curse has affected her mind, and she keeps wanting to use the car. I take her, nearly every day, and the social workers have advised her not to drive. I feel guilty, would not have chosen a sedan, but again, she needed the money, we have to have a car (and I am her chauffer). Her beautiful mind is affected, and she realizes it. And I feel guilty. Granddaughter has become a problem I cannot talk about, but if they allowed me to drink, I would keep Mogan David Blackberry handy. I guess it is good they won't let me. (I only used to like sweet wine.)

Have a good Christmas everyone.