karenb

I don't know how long it's been for you, but that old expression, "one day at a time" may fit for you for a while. Try and hang in there, you're here so far, right? This day will go by - don't think too much - find a little something you can kind of enjoy and go with it. You'll be fine....just try to think some good thoughts for a little while. Your friend, Karen

Happy Thanksgiving....I'm here for a minute....I do hope you find some peace today. Take care.. Your friend, Karen

Kim is so right.....good to hear from you, Kim, and Kay....I'm always here but don't respond too often....I love you all so much for all your support. Kay, please be determined as you are. We feel so much you're on the right track....we love you. Karen

Well, my friend, Kay - I, for one, am so pleased that you've come to this decision. When you first told us about him, I hoped you'd get out of that situation. Good for you. It will be hard, I know. I divorced my 1st husband after 24 years. The situation was awful, I know what you mean. Then I found my Jack and he showed me there are really good men in this world. When the time is right, it'll happen for you. I'm glad you're determined. Will you be safe? Please take care of yourself physically as well - the emotional is going to be hard enough. Let us know how you're doing. I'll look for your posts. Please take care. Your friend, Karen

It's touch and go, Marsha....we sure know that. There doesn't seem to be anything but time that helps. It's 3 years, 4 months and I've filled my time with paperwork, my small home business, my family, my dog, my yard, canning, mowing, gardening, volunteering, going to church, going to exercise - just tried to keep busy so the time would go by. As you know the evenings are hard, it would be so nice to have those husband's arms around you, the conversation and caring - it's not going to happen. But we do get through it - I'm here to testify to that as are many others here. You just have to take the blows, breath deep, and come out the other side one step closer to being somewhat the same person you were before....never the same, but somewhat closer. Take care of yourself - think of you first so you'll be able to think of others soon. Hang in there, my friend. Karen

Kay - I'm sorry about Lucky. I've had to put down two of my labs who were quite old, and their quality of life just wasn't there any more. They all are just like family. My heart goes out to you. She's a happy, healthy young dog again, and happy to be with George. Take care. Your friend, Karen

Hi....I'm so terribly sorry that this has happend for you and your children. I hope you find a little comfort here with these wonderful people. You are so young to have this happen. You have children that are such a blessing, please remember that all the time. Plase believe me, you will get through this - maybe with some scars - maybe with some hope, but you will. Just always remember that wonderful love you both had together and your lovely children. Sometimes, when you're the quiet one, things tend to come harder because you don't speak up. But here, no matter what time it is there's someone around who may be in a different time zone or awake, too, and needs to talk as well. It's difficult for any of us to give advice, except for what we've gone through. Mine is to try and go with the flow of emotions, cry when you need to (that happens way lot), try to surround yourself with loving, caring people, give those kids lots of hugs (so hard on them), take good care of yourself so you can take care of them - do whatever it is your intuition, emotions, and know that there's a lot of people who will help you, if you ask for it. Please, take care of yourself - it's so hard! Your friend, Karen

Oh, Kathy....I read this all the time but haven't responded too much lately just 'cause I'm busy or maybe I don't have too much to say. Regarding your flashbacks, my husband died suddenly and I didn't even have time to say goodbye. Well, when I was mowing the lawn my daughter suddenly came and said something's happened to Jack. We drove to the hospital, the doctor met us at the door, and I knew. They put me into emergency. Almost every time, when I'm moving the lawn, even after these 3 years I just vision my daugher walking down the yard to me and I see myself screaming, No, No, No. The blur after that kind of comes back, but I try to overcome that with the only thing I know, and that's prayer. The good Lord has been very good to me in letting a lot of it go away. I do know, Kathy, and the only thing I know is prayer and putting one darn foot in front of the other and doing everything you can to try to help yourself. I really feel for you...it's tough. At my church group's meeting today they hoped we would give testimony about the passing of our loved ones. A lady did that about her mother who died 8 years ago, and she just sobbed. It just breaks your heart. Hang in there, girl. You can do everything you want to do, if you just try really, really, hard, give your wonderful time to others to help them and we love you. Your friend, Karen

I'm so sorry, Barb, you must still be in shock. There's so much to have to try and deal with, it's impossible. All the emotions you'll feel will come, go, come, and go again. Everything you feel is all normal. It's the hardest thing we go through when we lose a loved one whether it's unexpected or an illness - it's all the same. Just try to go with your feelings, cry, stare into space, whatever, just go with it. We're all here for you, each at a different stage, but we all understand and hope you come back again. Just try to take care of yourself, and surround yourself with loving and caring people. Your friend, Karen

Hey Kim, Yeah! Yeah! Whatta butt-head, doesn't deserve you, and not much of a man! Your friend, Karen I know it's silly, but print this whole thing out and send it to him with a thank you card....Butt-head!

Kim... I'm shocked! That is the coldest, rudest, bad-hearted thing anyone could do. Whatta creep! I don't even understand people like that. You have to get yourself back on both feet, be proud of yourself and all that you've done and are doing. Don't let those kind of awful people hurt you. Wow! You are our friend, and we care for you, and we want you to feel good about yourself, and we love you, and all the rest. There should be a few of us around to take care of that person....just kidding, but maybe not! It makes my angry that you were hurt like that. You please start putting good thoughts in your mind and get rid of those thare aren't good for you. Please, please take care of yourself. Your friend, Karen

Thank you so much you guys I know of a Christian Singles site here and I'll try that one. It's so very strange to even think of this, but my very close friends think it might be okay to give this a try. My daughter has given me little things to be cautious of and I will....like an email address just for this type of thing, and my lady friends at Curves have all kinds of "things" to be careful of...like meeting the person at Curves where they will take stock of him. I am very lucky to have such good friends. Thanks, you guys. Wish me luck...at 69 I need it. Your friend, Karen

Now,you know I'm 69, my Jack has been gone for over 3 years, I still love him, I'm a member of a good churh with great women companions, volunteer with the food bank and try to do everything I can to better myself. Now, I'm wondering if I might like to talk to a male person now and then...only talk. What do you think about going on "safe" places to be? I sure would like your opinions because I've never been in this position before. Your friend...Karen

Hi Tampa, I am so very, very sorry for all you've gone through and your current circumstances. Sometimes this life is so tough it takes all we have to deal with it. My husband had diabetes, also, so I know how that goes - but he got treatment for it. You really need to watch your health carefully, especially with all the stress you've been going through. I'm glad you're seeing someone to help you along. Many people in this group have found that "talking" with each other, without any judgment on anyone's part, has helped. There are so many stories here and we all are now struggling through or have struggled through our loved one's death - many of us are so much better now having met and conquered a multitude of emotions and feelings. You keep trying to hang in there even though it may look grim here and there. I will pray for your well being. Please take care and let us know how you're doing. Your friend, Karen

I don't know how to IM you. Danny started getting this when he was 15 or so, but this last "stuff" has been going on (3 apartments, 3 evictions, for the last 10 years) for that amount of time. I so know how tough it is and I know how it can be for you, too. I know you must get so tired of all of this and I pray your new lady understands, too. She must be a special person! Thank you for remembering us...your fiend...Karen

Well...Hi William...remember me? I don't reply here too much, but I felt you were a person I needed to talk with. You are special to me. I know the things you have gone through and maybe still are some of them. I am good. I am feeling better with my son because he was evicted because of the drug people being there but he is back at the treatment center, and feeling good about it (from his voice.) It's been a long, hard time but he's safe from them for now. I'm so glad you're doing well. I think about you, care about you and pray for your continued well being. Always your friend, Karen

Our Dear Kim, You are an amazing, accomplished, loving and dedicated person to all of us. You, rightfully, should be so proud of your accomplishments in spite of all that faced you. There are few of people like you around, many of them are here on this site, who have faced such bad odds and are coming out on the better side of all of it. YOU DID IT!!! YOU DID IT!! It's wonderful what you've accomplished....you truly are amazing and I'm so proud to have known you. Bless your heart!!! Love you, Kim.....your frind, Karen

Hey Kathy.....Cheers to You! My daugher is a bit of a rescurer, too. She loves her animals and has one ferral cat that has gotten within a foot of her....she feeds her every night, and she has two others inside the house that are amazing in their habits. I've had dogs my whole life....and what a better unconditional love of life can you have. Good for you, Kathy. Maybe your pain is lessening and you are really letting a little more into your heart. Bless your heart. Your friend, Karen

Well, my gosh....isn't this world a wonderful world! Bless all our hearts and we are so privileged to hear this great story to two great people. It's such a life, isn't it? Bless your beautiful and caring hearts. Jack and I had such a caring and wonderful life in much the same manner. Love you both. I'm amazed and love this so much. Love, Karen

Oh, my God....I just know, know, know, where your mind is. I'm so sorry. I did another post titled something like I've got Fred and your bed. That tells you our current circumstances. These people that we love so much go through sooooo much! My Jack was so comforting to me through these times and he wasn't even Danny's father, but he loved him. You know, Kathy, it just seems like sometimes we need the Good Lord to just be with us because we're not with ourselves at all. I can just look out my garden window and just stare, not even thinking at all. I just get so tired, as I'm sure you do. Keep in touch on all this. I know it's never ending, but we have to stick together. Your friend, Karen

Hi my friends, It's been months and, actually, all his years that I have just so loved my son and dealt with his illness and, again today, after three times that he's had troubles with the drug people I cleaned another apartment and I'm so sorry that these awful people keep getting away with it. This time I only found 2 needles!! These people are so awful. My daughter gave Danny a fish who's name is Fred that I brought home, and she also gave him a better bed than he's ever had, and I brought that home. I now have his Fred and his bed!....and his clothes, books, dishes, etc. Danny now is back at the treatment center, and sounds just..okay. That's good enough for now. It just makes me so sad....kind of like I lost someone else, again! Karen

You know, Kay, things just happen to us, again and again, that we have no control over....you're nowhere near any edge! You're just a good human being that has unfortunate and sad things happen. I was just telling my grandson last night that same thing when he was feeling frustrated over things in his live - at age 25. I feel sometimes we just have to roll with the punches. It seems that I've "rolled with the punches" most of my life. Nothing surprises me any more. But you'll find your faith again one day and things will settle down for you. You're such a good person. Try not to think too much, that gets bothersome. Take care. You're such a good person. Your friend, Karen

My friends, I guess an update for those of you who prayed for my son, Danny. He was evicted from his apartment because those drug people would not stop coming around. For those of you who haven't been around this type of thing, those predators always zero in on the mentally ill. My son was very vulnerable, and it was advised that he shouldn't live with me. He likes Whatcom County anyway, and I prayed that his housing subsidy would be saved. The caseworker did just that for his future housing, and moved him back into the Lake Whatcom Treatment Center. He's very lucky, and I hope he knows it. He'll get his meals, keep his job, and be safe from those people. Thanks for your prayers and support. I'll go up this week-end and clean his apartment, try to get rid of what I can, store some stuff here, etc. I'll bring my pepper spray in case they try to come around. Thanks, again, my friends. Your friend, Karen

Small towns can be difficult....everyone thinks they know everything it seems. Maybe something might come down the road. But you are so right, God's in your heart and you have a big one. Please take care and keep on plugging along. Your friend, Karen

Hi Kay, It's a real shame that the people who should comfort and help you out just are not there as they should be. It really is their loss in many ways. Those so-called church people don't even know the meaning of giving to someone in need. It does take all kinds in this world. We are here to care for and comfort others. Jack and I were going to find a church home, he was a caring and giving Christian man, and I have my Christian faith, too. But we wanted a "home" together - we certainly got interrupted. About two years after he passed away I decided I needed to finish some things I needed to do, and through my friends at Curves started attending their church. It was the best decision I've made. I have very caring, giving, and supportive friends there that have helped me through some tough times, and I do the same for them. My family is wonderful, too. I am very lucky. I hope that the time may come for you to try another church home, you never know. This church has a motto - reaching up to God, and out to people - and they really do. You can see by the many posts that this is of real interest to us, and it should be. You hang in there, Kay. Good things will happen for you because you have such a big heart. Your friend, Karen