mlg Posted August 26, 2009 Report Share Posted August 26, 2009 Has anyone heard from Jo? I have been worrying about what decisions she made and if she is by herself Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Mayhew Posted August 26, 2009 Report Share Posted August 26, 2009 Hi Mary LindaI sent her a message a while back and she replied to say that she was on chemotherapy and feeling extremely nauseous.Sorry, I can't remember exactly when that was though.xx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
valley Posted September 7, 2009 Report Share Posted September 7, 2009 Mary Linda and Boo,I too have been wondering about Jo. Glad that you reached out to her Boo. I hope she is managing ok. My heart went out to her when she shared her story.Valley Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
green2010 Posted September 19, 2009 Report Share Posted September 19, 2009 I have been posting in another forum about losing my Mom and then today decided to check out this forum because I am taking care of my elderly stepdad and I noticed I have anxiety about his health a lot. I read Jo's thread and was so impressed with her honesty and clarity. She mentioned a couple times that her posts might not make sense but they were actually very insightful and clear. I was wondering how she is doing as well. Jo, if you're reading this, I hope all is well with you and that the treatment is going okay. Your posts hit home with me on a few things. You were able to articulate things in a way that gave me some insight into my own life. I hope you can stop by and post sometime soon. Take care(((hugs))) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jo got the keys? Posted September 21, 2009 Report Share Posted September 21, 2009 A bright, shiny special hello to all of you who queried about me here, as well as a shame-faced "Please forgive me!" to everyone who picked me up, brushed me off, set me off tottering on my path and to whom I never looked back at months ago. My only excuse: I was crazy with grief and fear. But I do remember that when I wanted to get back on and check in with all of you after a time (especially to thank you from the bottom of my heart), I then saw that the thread was closed, and it was debiltating, nay, crushing! I was overwhelmed, and absolutely unable to imagine how to continue that one or start a new on. How stupid of me.Since then, my treatments, hospitalizations, illness and attempts at coping have kept me very, very busy. To those who wondered, I am being treated here in Spain, although not at the same hospital where my husband was. Instead, his friend (the anaesthesilogist) got me past the waiting lists at the hospital where he works. Have I regretted my decision? Probably daily, and especially during the times I was hospitalized. It ain`t pretty, but with all the current global attention on "socialized" vs private health care, the debate has come at a time in my life when I have absolutely no palate for discussing pros and cons. It is what it is. My only consolation is that I have stayed near my son and daughter, and allowed them to be a part of this, albeit minimally, as they are still dodging most of it. My only way to describe them is still that they remind me of deer in the headlights. Unfortunately, not much has changed there. My oncologist (a nice lady but not someone that inspires great confidence) tells me that there are no guarantees, but that the tumor is limited and hopefully will respond well to the simultaneous chemo and radiotherapy. I just finished the latter, so expect to begin feeling better some time soon. However, there have been many interruptions, complications and setbacks, including two lengthy hospital stays, one of which taught me a great deal about being alone in the world.And that brings me to THAT ... the other looming issue in my life. I have somehow managed to push it to the back of my mind, although I know that it is all artificial. The only real emotions with which I seem to struggle constantly are anger and loneliness-when-in-need. Well, and trying to re-establish the family constellation, if you will. We no longer know who we are without Jose, and without his buffering through the rough times, we are much more exposed and raw. I only hope that, once the disease is conquered, we will be able to take out all those pent up emotions and deal with them somehow. Hopefully, the experience will give us the maturity and stability needed to handle all of the hurt and frustration, rage and sense of permanent loss.But enough of all that. I hope you are well, coping and learning to live life as best you can. I am reminded often of the blessing that some see in cancer, as a true giver of life. In my case, I hope that is true, but I am certainly convinced that there are many ways to learn the lesson of the true meaning of our time here. One of those is what we all have in common here in our bereavement. May that we learn that lesson well, both for us left behind as well as those who have preceded us. We all know that they would want it thus.Deep and meaningful healing to all ... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Mayhew Posted September 21, 2009 Report Share Posted September 21, 2009 Hello Jo!! It was SO good to see your name on the board again :-)Yes, as you can see, we have all been thinking of you and wondering how your treatment was going. Your post was inspriring, absolutely, to me. I can only sit here in awe and amazement at how pragmatic an approach you have taken to beating this awful disease, not to mention the fact that you are, as you say, raw and exposed without Jose and grieving for him. It is very apparent that you have had a lot of time to think and worked through those thoughts applying your intellect and rationale/logic and that in itself is part of healing in your grief work.I can imagine that you do miss him terribly, beyond words ... personally if I just get a tiny teeny health problem such as an ear infection (which pales in comparison and puts my worries into perspective rapidly when I think of what you are living through) it makes me miss Cliff even more. I am not in your shoes, but I tried to think about what I would be like ... and can't really. It's unspeakably cruel that you have been given this to conyend with too. I read what you said about your grief being stuck in a state of missing him to help you through this and that made perfect sense to me. As I said, any minor pathetic health problem and I get stuck there too ... no wonder you feel like this. It's still grieving though, you don't have to go through the whole loss cycle in text-book fashion. Hell, none of us does in any event!Yes, Jo ... I agree whole-heartedly, cancer I'm sure can teach you to appreciate life, but there are other ways to learn the lesson, especially in the aftermath of losing the love of your life.Please don't feel bad about not writing here for a while. We all knew that you were sick - plus the treatments add to how ill you feel .(gross understatement I know) .. I'd have wondered what was wrong if you had been posting here (and worrying that you weren't going for treatment to be honest). I'm so glad Mary Linda started this topic so that you could see with your own eyes that we were still thinking of you and care.When you are recovering between the therapies/treatments, please drop us a line to let us know how you are responding to your treatment.LoveBooxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MartyT Posted September 21, 2009 Report Share Posted September 21, 2009 Dear Ones, Just so you know ~ I have no idea how Jo's original topic, Too Many Issues to Cope With, became "closed" ~ but I'm glad she told us about it, and it's back "open" now. And Jo, welcome back Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mlg Posted September 21, 2009 Author Report Share Posted September 21, 2009 I'm so glad you were finally able to post again. I hope you grow stronger every day and then you can continue on this journey. Right now put as much of your energy as you can to getting well. Believe me the grief will still be there when you're done. Still praying for you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marsha Posted September 21, 2009 Report Share Posted September 21, 2009 Jo - "Please forgive me" - Please don't even think that way! You touched my heart, and I'm glad to see you here, talking to us - whenever and however you can. Hugs, Marsha Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
valley Posted October 1, 2009 Report Share Posted October 1, 2009 Jo, Wonderful to hear from you. We all have been pulling for you and concered. Take care of yourself right now and the other things will evolve in their own time. You are what is important now and your focus needs to be on "you" and healing. May Spain's medical system work well for you. Thinking of you and sending my love, Valley Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
laurieb Posted October 1, 2009 Report Share Posted October 1, 2009 Jo God Bless and please know that you ARE in prayers and thoughts and you are NOT alone.... even if you feel it physically. you have touched many peoples lives far away and put a great deal in perspective... I admire your strength, determination and desire for recovery physically and emotionally. Laurie Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SHeiss Posted April 20, 2010 Report Share Posted April 20, 2010 Jo, Everyone seems to love you here. I just wanted to say hello to you and offer an ear whenever you may need it. I hope your treatments are going well! -Sharla Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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