I Thought Of You Today

[WaltC]

Five Years ago my dear wife, for over 40 years, was unable to swallow, so we went to the Hospital to find out what was causing the problem. After a few hours in the ER and after a few tests she was admitted for observation. When I went to visit her in her room, the admitting Doctor called to give me the bad news - she had cancer of the liver and was expected to die within two weeks.... that was the beginning of the end for me. Jeannie was later admitted to Palliative care where she survived for 99 days.

I miss her a lot.

When someone wishes me a Happy New Year I must admit that I don't remember what Happy means anymore.

I haven't felt that emotion for a very long time.

But thanks to this group and its caring members I have survived - best wishes to everyone in 2010.

this one is for Jeannie -

http://www.inspiring...t/movie/you.php

Jeannie - I miss you dear - "God has you in his keeping and I have you in my heart"

[marsha]

Hugs and love to you, Walt - for your Jeannie and you - love is eternal, isn't it? Hugs, Marsha

[Lea W]

WaltC,

Hugs to you, I am so sorry for your loss. Today also holds special, but not so wonderful, meaning to myself. It was two years ago today that marked the

beginning of the end of the life of my split apart. I wish I could say it was cancer, or something more explainable, but reality is that a stupid routine

ERCP caused the death of the love of my life. I think what hurts the most is the fact that I forced him to go for the test that killed him. God knows I didn't

want him to die, I wanted him to be with me forever. The dye that was shot into the pancreas caused it to pretty much eat itself up. as well as every organ in

the abdomonal area. Three and a half months of hell in icu on life support, he finally passed from my world. I loved him for thirty years, we have 5 beautiful

children together, but I thanked God the day he finally took him from this world. I don't know if I can forgive the Lord for all the pain he made him endure for

the last 3 1/2 months of his life. Patrick was so selfless, he gave his all for his family.

Not to take away from your pain, I just wanted to let you know that your pain is shared, and God must know what he is doing. He sure has taken

those who are most special from this world. I guess they have already fulfilled thier obligations on this earth and you and I still have work to do.

Take care,

Lea

[LarrysGirl]

WaltC, It is a new year and like you said you have survived. I hope for this new year that it may bring many more happy memories and a sense of peace for you. Thank you for sharing Jeannie with us Walt. And thank you for helping me survive when I felt certain I would not. Always in our hearts we remember them. Deborah

[kath]

Dear Walt,

This is a beautiful tribute to your beloved Jeannie. My heart aches for you.

Take care,

Kath

[Maryo]

Thank you Walt.

I wish you peace and comfort for 2010.

Mary Lou

[David'sGirlStill]

Walt,

My thoughts and hugs are with you. I'm , so sorry for the pain you feel. But how wonderful to feel that much love.

Phyllis

[Dusky]

WaltC,

Thanks for the wonderful Link. It is always so nice to see you on the site. I read the posts but don't post much myself anymore. I do however think I will add the link you provided to my own web site. Thanks again - it was beautiful.

[jrm]

Walt, I know 40 years is a long time to love someone but when we feel we had a lot more love to give there is pain and longing for that person. I can tell from your post how devastated you both must have been to learn the diagnosis. For you to have her 99 days when you thought you only had 2 weeks must have brought you some happiness. I hope in the 5 years you have found some comfort in this journey. For me it's only been 6 months and the journey has been rough. I have been grateful to find this site to come to. I do have a lot of support at home but when this 9 room house gets lonely and quiet, I have someplace to go and talk. God Bless you and your Jeannie. Judy

[JeanneC]

Dear Walt:

I will pray for your wife Jeannie. What a wonderful tribute to her.

May God Bless you.

Jeanne

(as you can see we share the name)

[mlg]

Walt,

You know the thing I think about most when I think of you is the first Thanksgiving ( I think that was the holiday) when you set a place at the table for Jeannie and put her picture there. I will forever remember that post and picture.

[kayc]

Oh Walt, I feel what you are saying! I recently ran into some correspondence to/from George, and it reminded me how very much I am missing with this dear sweet man gone from my life...I try not to go there too much, it hurts too bad. I wish all of you could have known him, you'd understand what I mean...just as you miss your little Jeannie and always will. One day, Walt, one day we will at last get to join them.

[mrspapajohn]

Walt - How wonderful for your Jeannie that she had your love, and you hers for so many years. I can completely relate when you say you don't know what happy is anymore. My beloved husband of almost thirty years, Stephen, died one year ago yesterday. He also died unexpectantly of liver disease, after he had received a transplant. He had suffered three years of horrible torment before the transplant, but had three months of wonderful health before they diagnosed a new, very virulent strain of Hep C in the new liver. He lived one week after receiving the diagnosis. He died at home, in our bed, in my arms. I am very grateful for that but I am still lost when someone wishes me a "happy new year" because I still cannot picture "happy" without him. For this year I wish you and all the loving, caring people on this site peace for 2010.

Kathy