Marj37 Posted June 7, 2015 Author Report Share Posted June 7, 2015 It has to be hard, remembering, and also seeing his brother suffer from his absence. I've watched pets grieve, Autumn when Midnight died, Lucky...when my husband died, Tigger when my husband died, Miss Mocha when Lucky died, etc. All I know to do is give them plenty of attention to help them through their grief & adjustment. It helps to go through it together. Thank Kay....glad you are here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kayc Posted June 8, 2015 Report Share Posted June 8, 2015 I'm glad I'm here too...here is where I belong. Funny it took grief to find it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marj37 Posted June 8, 2015 Author Report Share Posted June 8, 2015 It feels like an understanding family I've adopted. My sons don't understand. Here I don't feel like a crazy old lady. Marj May tomorrow be softer May my soulmate stay close. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kayc Posted June 8, 2015 Report Share Posted June 8, 2015 Because you aren't a crazy old lady! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kacy Posted June 8, 2015 Report Share Posted June 8, 2015 Marj, I have sons also, and they don't understand either. I think they try though. In my case, one never even met our last two dogs that we lost because he lives out of state. The other son was living here part of the time, but the dogs were kind of shy, and he wasn't really close to them. I think it's harder for them to understand when the dog or cat is not part of THEIR daily life. Plus, being males they don't really like to talk about loss. At least IMO. The one who lived with these dogs says he will never have dogs because it's too hard to lose them. He talks about 2 that we lost that he was closer to. I hate to say I'm starting to agree with him. Can't go thru this again, although I know I will have to. Again, not many understand, but we do here. Hope today is a bit better, although I find that even the better days can quickly change to sad days if I don't fight it. Hard not to go back over things and wish they could have been prevented or that we could have done something differently. It's a terrible feeling that I'm not sure how we will live with. Just have to keep hoping that they are in a better place. Mary Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marj37 Posted June 8, 2015 Author Report Share Posted June 8, 2015 Hi Mary---and anyone else reading this. I am so hoping they are happy. I sure miss my rascal Gb. My younger son apologized for taking my grief time so lightly. I was glad of that. He had made a remark about Hamish being king of the castle and didn't ask how we were doing at all. Just said he hurt his back. So I wrote back and said Hamish kitty and I wer having a hard time. He doesn't live nearby so he had no idea of the daily routine and life I had with the kitties. He never asked and looked bored if i started telling him. So there we are. I need to order some of my digi pics made into photos. Especially the ones of the two of them. Above is another precious one from a cold evening in the winter. Marj & Hamish missing our Gb May tomorrow be softer May our soulmates stay close Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MartyT Posted June 8, 2015 Report Share Posted June 8, 2015 I'm glad your son apologized, Marj. When others underestimate or make light of the pain of losing our precious animal companions ~ especially when those "others" are family members who should know us well enough to know how much this loss hurts ~ it can be especially hard to bear. You are in our hearts ~ and the pictures of your kitties together are priceless! ♥ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kayc Posted June 9, 2015 Report Share Posted June 9, 2015 I am glad he apologized, I guess he just didn't realize how close you are to your cats...or they to each other. So many people just miss the boat when it comes to comforting grievers because they don't understand how it feels or they don't know what to/not to say. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LadyCarrie Posted June 9, 2015 Report Share Posted June 9, 2015 Hello to all, Until our wee Ashely Rose Doxie died, I did not believe animals go to Heaven, for I had been taught since childhood that Jesus died for people only. I do not believe it was an accident that I found the following excerpt in an article just after Ashely died. I believe God led me to it, because I had/have a great need. It was originally written in "Illustrated History of Methodism," 1887. For the entire article, see www.imarc.cc/reghist/reghist5.html. A Survey of the Life and Times of Adam Clarke as recorded in the Illustrated History of Methodism" 1887. "Dr. Clarke, with his generous nature, never could have been any thing but an Arminian. Free grace was a doctrinal necessity to him: no predestination could stand in the way of any poor sinner who wanted to be good and go to glory. According to his hospitable ideas, the front door of heaven stood wide open day and night, and he was almost ready to believe there was a side door, or a back door, also, by which the animal creation might enter. And in this latter view he held with John Wesley, who regarded it as highly probable." Adam Clarke (b. 1760-1762, d. August 28, 1832[1]) was a British Methodist theologian and biblical scholar (Wikipedia). I use the Adam Clarke Commentary along with my Bible as part of my morning worship. I cannot remember what "prompted" me to read this article, but I believe I know Who. I showed this to Jerry, as soon as I found it. This new information brought us great joy at a time when our grief was raw and recent. I hope and pray it will be a comfort to others here as well. If these great theologians believed this probable, I believe it's probable also. Now we know our darling little fur baby will be running to meet us with all her little being when we go to Heaven. How grand is that! Someone (I can't ember who at the moment; I'm sorry) shared Celtic Thunder's "A Place in the Choir." I just found it, and listened to it with unbidden tears streaming down my face. I hadn't broken down to that degree in a while, but the tears were a mixture of pain and joy as I imagined our wee hound singing her little heart out in God's Choir. I'm still in need of a hanky, so please pardon mistakes. The screen is a bit blurred. We have Celtic Thunder's CD with this song on it (they are a favorite group of ours also). I just hadn't heard the song since Ashely died, so had not made the connection. What a visual to think of her and our other Doxie babies, Catey Elizabeth and Heidi Hilda, singing together! Our three little hounds in a Heavenly choir ~ what a picture in my mind! When Beauregard Doxie gets there, he can sing the bass part (he's 15). I'm sure God will forgive him for cussin' squirrels in our back yard. A big Thank You to whoever shared the music with us. Blessings, Carrie Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LadyCarrie Posted June 9, 2015 Report Share Posted June 9, 2015 I believe my Thank You goes to Marj. ❤️ Carrie Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kayc Posted June 9, 2015 Report Share Posted June 9, 2015 Carrie, My mom always said animals didn't go to heaven. She was wrong, and I hope she is glorious in that thought as she's now joined her dogs Huck, Rosie, and Billie. I don't need theologians to teach me what I already know inside my heart...that God is not stupid enough to waste the best creatures he ever made! It's common sense to me. The Bible says the lion will lay down with the lamb, so we know there's creatures in heaven. Why would God let a lion and a lamb in but not a dog or a cat? Nope, that doesn't make sense to me, he's smarter than that! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LadyCarrie Posted June 9, 2015 Report Share Posted June 9, 2015 My belief regarding the lamb and lion has been a future event. ❤️ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marj37 Posted June 9, 2015 Author Report Share Posted June 9, 2015 I believe my Thank You goes to Marj. ❤️ Carrie Carrie -- you are so welcome. i walk around the house singing that song..with tears flowing...along with you I picture them singing their hearts out. So glad you listened to it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marj37 Posted June 9, 2015 Author Report Share Posted June 9, 2015 My belief regarding the lamb and lion has been a future event. ❤️ Amen to that LadyCarrie! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marj37 Posted June 9, 2015 Author Report Share Posted June 9, 2015 I am glad he apologized, I guess he just didn't realize how close you are to your cats...or they to each other. So many people just miss the boat when it comes to comforting grievers because they don't understand how it feels or they don't know what to/not to say. Thanks, Kay! Sadly he has no clue--- even tho he has a publishing house on the side - LovingHealingPress - and publishes all manner of healing type books. It's such a paradox. I am doing my sad journey with the support of your all here - and an e-pal that is very like minded and she and her two kitties are like me and mine. Bonded from head to toe. Thanks for letting my tears drip here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marj37 Posted June 9, 2015 Author Report Share Posted June 9, 2015 I'm glad your son apologized, Marj. When others underestimate or make light of the pain of losing our precious animal companions ~ especially when those "others" are family members who should know us well enough to know how much this loss hurts ~ it can be especially hard to bear. You are in our hearts ~ and the pictures of your kitties together are priceless! ♥ Thanks, Marty-------you are an angel to host this whole website and especially to include our fur companions as a separate "room". I almost didn't say a thing to my son about that as I am so worn down but what he said was not unexpected - I decided to speak up so that any other people he encounters will perhaps benefit in the future. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MartyT Posted June 9, 2015 Report Share Posted June 9, 2015 ♥ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kayc Posted June 10, 2015 Report Share Posted June 10, 2015 I think it was right that you speak up, not only for yourself, but for others. We are never too old to learn! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marj37 Posted June 10, 2015 Author Report Share Posted June 10, 2015 Thanks , Kay. Tuesday evening, almost 9pm I had to post right now. It is two weeks ago at this time that I let Gb go. Oh, how I miss his love and affection; his funny little body next to mine on the pillow or piled on my lap with Hamish when I watched tv in the evening. Or following me around the house - he loved to be with me. I keep saying to myself , "How can it be?". All I wanted was a simple life with my fur kids and pursue my other interests. Nothing fancy........ I know it is normal for the situation. A really hard evening. I'm glad my older son was here for dinner --- we sat at the kitchen table and watched all the birds at the feeder and a baby bunny hopping around. And i shared a few Gb anecdotes with him. And my Hamish finally ate a decent meal----I had stewed a chicken thigh for him. Bless you al for being there and having been there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kacy Posted June 10, 2015 Report Share Posted June 10, 2015 Marj, Your words have hit home with me, and I'm sure others here. It's so hard to understand why they had to leave us. When Lucy, the Cavalier we lost last year, died, I would just sit and cry and tell my husband over and over that I just did not understand why she was taken from us. I feel the same way - don't feel like we were asking for much just to be able to enjoy spending time with our babies. We are not fancy people either. Would much rather spend an evening at home with the dogs rather than be out doing just about anything else. And now, Allie, was taken too. I guess we are supposed to accept rather than question, but I'm having a hard time doing that. I'm glad that Hamish had a good meal. I'm sure it's harder for him since the kitties were so close and enjoyed each others company. From the pictures you have posted of them, they definitely were two peas in a pod. So lucky for them that you adopted them together, and they were able to spend almost 15 years together. Enjoy seeing the pictures - hope you will post more. Mary Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kayc Posted June 10, 2015 Report Share Posted June 10, 2015 I had an affection cat like that once, his name was Chappy. I only got him a couple of short years and a cougar got him. He used to sleep with me, on my chest, with his head tucked under my chin and his arms wrapped around my neck. I couldn't understand why I had to lose him so soon, esp. since I'd felt he was God's gift to me after George died. These precious beings live in our hearts always and will never be forgotten. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marj37 Posted June 10, 2015 Author Report Share Posted June 10, 2015 Thanks, Kacy. I steeled myself t his morning to return Gb's unused subq supplies . That was a challenge for sure. I ended up saying one sentence and rushed out the door. When I'm crying so hard and feel so raw I sometimes think it would be lucky to have my brain wiped clean -but I really don't want that at all. I want to know & keep the wonderful memories of Gb and all his antics and loving ways and games of chase they used to play----thumping thru the house even at almost 15. . I'm sure you want those lasting memories of Allie & Lucy. But I don't like that he is gone. Not one bit. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marj37 Posted June 10, 2015 Author Report Share Posted June 10, 2015 I had an affection cat like that once, his name was Chappy. I only got him a couple of short years and a cougar got him. He used to sleep with me, on my chest, with his head tucked under my chin and his arms wrapped around my neck. I couldn't understand why I had to lose him so soon, esp. since I'd felt he was God's gift to me after George died. These precious beings live in our hearts always and will never be forgotten. Oh Kay---- so glad you had that experience. And thanks for telling me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marj37 Posted June 10, 2015 Author Report Share Posted June 10, 2015 Wed. afternoon. I have another precious picture of the guys to share. There is a bed behind my computer chair and they were always there when I was up here - either napping , looking out the window at the back yard or, like this picture, where they are waiting for dinner. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kayc Posted June 11, 2015 Report Share Posted June 11, 2015 I agree with you, I would never want to lose my memory because my late husband and pets and parents, etc. are in them. Memories, faith, and hope are all I have left! Your picture is so sweet. I think it's neat that our pets want to be near us and have their own little rituals. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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