LoriS.

I agree with everyone...your BIL is a jerk. A big hug to you and I hope you find your way through this!!! Lori

Dear Bertha, I like how you refered to your mom as "the most awesome little momma a person could hope to have". I know exactly what you mean! I loved my mom so much and she truly was awsome...and she was also little! That made me smile! Thank you for that! Lori S.

Dear Shubom, What an incredibly hard situation to have to deal with right now. I hope all goes well with your sisters boyfriend. Please keep us posted and take care of yourself. I'm so sorry! Lori

I am so sorry about your loss. I just found these boards last week and feel a lot better since I have found them. Just knowing that there are others that can truly know what you are going through. I ditto everything Annette said. Be kind to yourself. Read through some of the well written articles that Marty has written about grief. Keep coming here and post all you want. Everyone understands. Ask a friend or neighbor for help with watching your kids, groceries, etc. Take a warm bath. It feels so good, even if you're sad. Take care...Lori

Annette, I am so sorry that you are going through this. Have you talked to a counselor or even your doctor? I think all of here can relate to these feelings that you are having. I agree with Shell when she says that if you cry that you will feel like you have to face it head on and that would make it more real; more final. When you are ready, you'll figure out what to do. There was a period of time when I was crying so much and so hard that my facial muscles actually started to hurt for days! It's certainly not fun and it can feel scary, but I think it's totally normal...especially reading these boards. I'm so glad I found these boards. I really do feel supported. And we are all here to support you, Annette. Take care...Lori

Lauren...How are you doing? I hope you're ok. A big hug to you...Lori

Bertha, I posted a reply to you on the board that I originally started. AnnieO...a big hug for you! Lori

Hi Princesskiki, Last week at my therapists office, as I was crying, she started crying! It felt wierd because I need HER to be strong for me! She is such a wonderful person, but to be honest, I was a little bothered by it. I didn't know what to do...except cry along with her! Lori

Trudy, I just sent you my email address. Lori

Shelley I have been reading your posts and am so sorry for your loss. I'm sure your sister is anticipating your anxiety and will help you through...and you will help her as well. Good luck on the plane ride...I know you'll do fine. Go, enjoy and have fun...your mom would want that for you. Take care...Lori

Trudy, Where was the candle, the flowers and the picture placed at the wedding? In the dinner room area? Please let me know...I'd love to bring this idea up to my daughter who truly loved both of my parents, but had a particular connection with my mom. Thanks and take care...Lori

I wish I could give you a big bear hug and you could let out your feelings all you want! I am a mom of 2 girls ages 24 and 20, so you being 15 isn't too far off for me to know how much it hurts for a young girl like yourself. I really feel for you. I hope you have good friends that are there for you. I'm sure your Mom loves you...don't give up on her yet. I pray that someday she can be there for you. Love, Lori

Trudy, I cried also while reading your post. My daughter is getting married on October 5 this year and my mom passed away Oct. 22 06'. I know it's going to be hard, but how your family handled it was very inspiring. I hope that we can figure out something special to represent my mom (and dad who passed away 3 years ago). Thanks so much for sharing that with us! Lori

Annette, I am so sorry for both of your losses. When we are grieving we feel like a part of us is lost as well because our lives have changed so dramatically since the loss of our loved ones. Like Shell said, you're not crazy and everything you are feeling is normal. I just found these boards yesterday and it's amazing how I don't feel so alone in all this insanity. You sound like you have held in your tears because they come at the wrong times. Have you had a chance to cry when it's been a better time? I have been crying a lot lately and I hate it, but I guess it's natures way of healing the pain (I hope that's what it's for!). Maybe a councelor one on one would be good for you. Also writing in a journal seems to help me. I keep a small spiral notebook in my purse and it comes in handy when I want to clear my head. Take care...Lori

I am truly sorry for your loss. It's hard enough being a teenager anyways and to deal with the loss of a parent must be so hard for you at this time in your life. I would give you a big if I could see you! Have you thought about counceling? It may really help you to let it out with a "live" person as well as to post here. My thoughts are with you. Lori

I am so sorry. This day is sure to be a challenge for you, but try your best to hang in there. If you need to cry, just let it out. I hope you have positive people around you to help you when you need it. Good luck...Lori

Pebbles, I am new here, too and feel for you. My mom passed away this passed October, and I also live far away. It's very hard not being there to see everything that's going on. Circumstances would have it that I broke my arm in August and wasn't able to work (I was a manicurist for 22 years) and I was weaning out of the job anyways. My kids are grown, so I was able to go back east and be there for as long as was needed. The hospice people...from the financial issues all the way to the caregivers and nurses are angels from heaven here on earth. They were amazing. Best of luck to you and I hope you can get out to Arizona soon! Take care...Lori

Janine, I am so sorry for your loss. I am new to these boards, too. My mom passed away October 06'. I feel your pain. I too have all the anxiety issues that you have and have so much physical pain as well. Hang in there. Again, so sorry...Lori

Hi everyone. My dear mother died on October 22 06' from old age and a cancerous tumor. She was 85. It was quick and fast and the saddest thing I ever went through. I was with her everyday for 1 week in the hospital and 4 days in a hospice unit of a very nice nursing home where they made things so comfortable for the whole family. I had some very small, yet profound conversations with her about how she was feeling, how I was feeling, etc. She was the most positive force in my life...she was my biggest fan! I'm an adult 48 year old woman, happily married for 25 years, have 2 wonderful daughters...one is getting married in October...but nothing has prepared me for how devastating this loss has been. I have some ok days but most of my days lately have been filled with tears and such extreme sadness and a sense of longing and yearning for her. I hope that I can find some "friends" here that will completely understand what I am going through. Thanks in advance...Lori S.