LarrysGirl Posted December 20, 2007 Report Share Posted December 20, 2007 (edited) I meant to name this topic "Survivors Guilt". I made a mistake and can't seen to be able to edit the title. I'm sorry. This has been a particularly hard time since November. Since I've reached the two yr. mark, what if any friends, have all but disappeared. NO ONE even brings up his name and I'm starting to feel some aggravation from family that I haven't moved forward or snapped out of it yet (their words, not mine). I was explaining to someone that I feel guilty that I'm here, alive, I have felt this since the day Larry died. People don't want to hear that. I know I did everything I could. I don't feel guilty about that. I know he felt I gave him everything I could when he was alive. I feel guilty because we fought his illness as a team, never giving up hope and looking forward to the life we had planned for the future. It was a long and hard battle and he held on with all his strength, hoping against hope. Now I've been left with what is left of "our" life, our dogs, etc. and I feel guilty for being here. I don't want a life without him. I'm struggling with the fact that I still have a life to live and he is gone. It is not fair. I've read that this is called "survivor's guilt". But what do you do, if this is what you feel? I can't stand it when people say to me, he wouldn't want you to feel this way. I'm sure he wouldn't but I do anyway. How do any of you cope with this feeling? Did anyone here also go thru a long illness with their spouses? Deborah Edited December 20, 2007 by LarrysGirl Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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