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Many of you know that I have been struggling with the lack of presence that I feel from my spouse that passed in April. It has saddened me that I have not had any dreams etc. I had a tough day on Sunday with alot of emotions, ie. lots of crying. Later in the day a thought occured to me. My husband lost his sight in his left eye due to the cancer tumor wrapping itself around the optic nerve. Randy said he had visions of a little black fluffy dog on his shoulder. The optamologist told us that this is a normal reaction of someone that has lost their sight. Similiar to a person that has lost a limb due to amputation, they will still have feelings in their limb that is not there. Fantom pain, etc. Randy continued to have this little black fluffy dog on his shoulder for some time. AFter his passing I returned to our home in Kansas. To make a long story short, I began being a foster parent for a 4 lb. BLACK toy poodle named Liza. She is a sweetheart and I would just take her home at night after helping out a dog groomer during the day. I have a 14 year old needy basset hound and did not need or want another dog. But after 2 weeks, the poodle had found a home with me and I could not let her be adopted. The basset hound even seemed to do better with her around. It just dawned on me Sunday, that Randy had sent that "little back fluffy dog" to me so I would not be so lonely. It brings me a smile and a warm feeling looking at her now knowing that he sent her to me and I just now figured it out. It was a sign right in front of me.



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I'm happy for you and your story brought me happy tears, God works in ways we don't understand and somehow finds a way to bring things in perspective when we least expect it...my two dogs have been a constant reminder of Ruth and how much she loved them, she had a mixed Cocker and Pomeranian when I met her, him and I made instant buddies and my son gave us a litte Shiatsu a few years back and the two are the best buddies, I cry often as I look at her dog as he is getting old and I know he will not be with me much longer, it gives me the feeling that he is the last reminder of her still with me, I really am going to have a hard time when God calls him, but I know he will join his master in heaven when the day comes, I have already decided to have him cremated and placed along side Ruth in my home and I will have to get a companion for my little one, but for now one day at a time....

I am happy that you have found some comfort, keep the positive energy and feelings flowing I find it much less painful if I stay positive...

Take Care and My God Bless


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My Dear Friend Becky,

I am so HAPPY that what you had seen as a negative in Randy's life really was turned into a TRUE gift from GOD. Even though it took awhile for you to realize, that this little black poodle, which by the way love them, we had a champagne color one for 15 years, we named Cassie, was a sign sent to you early in your grief that Randy is still with you and to trust in it as well. Now you can start to build on such a positive sign. You will find the great PEACE that I feel now. Let it light the flame inside you an each and every that flame, will grow stronger and stronger, until one day it is a roaring blaze inside that no one or anything will ever put out again.

God Bless, Becky may the Lord give you many more Blessings and positive emotions each day from here on forward.


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Oh Becky ~ as a fellow animal lover, you just have to know how much I love your story! You deserve all the comfort you can find. I'm so happy for you, and so pleased that you recognized this precious little Liza to be the sign you needed from your beloved.

I just happen to be reading a book right now entitled The Reason: Help and Hope for Those Who Grieve by Sally Grablick. She lost her 19-year old son Ryan to suicide, and she describes her book as "the story of how his spirit returned to save mine." She shares many incidents that demonstrate her growing ability to receive messages from her son and recognize signs of his ongoing presence in her life. Among other things, she strongly advocates getting a pet to ease the pain of loss. At one point in her book she writes,

"If anyone were to ask me for advice on how to help a family deal with grief, I would have to say--get a dog. Maxx got us over more humps than I can even begin to count. We poured out displaced affection for Ryan into our puppy. In return, he gave us all protection, laughter and unconditional love. Maxx brought joy back into the house. Caring for him helped us focus our attention on something other than our sadness and that made him worth his weight in gold . . . his love was magic, and the best part was that we had access to him 24/7 (pp. 37-38)."

Companion animals are a warm, living, breathing and responsive source of affection, comfort, companionship, loyalty and love, and I would encourage anyone struggling with grief to consider adopting one ~ but only after you've investigated what kind of pet would suit you and your lifestyle.

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Becky, I am so happy for you. I believe this is truely a sign from Randy. It appears that we must just wait and be open to these signs.

I have not felt Rich's presence, nor have I seen a sign from him yet. I figure there must be a reason that I can not sense him. It used to concern me but it doesn't at this point. I am just waiting.

I am very happy for you and to have a little dog too!


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