kayc Posted February 15, 2016 Report Share Posted February 15, 2016 Two years? She did well then. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hollowheart Posted February 15, 2016 Report Share Posted February 15, 2016 6 hours ago, Cookie said: Iheartm: I think it's healthy that you can access the feelings that are so deep. I have trouble crying out in public and sometimes even at home. Think I am trying to resist the pain, although, i know that is impossible. I know what you are saying, though, about the depth of the pain and the feeling of having lost your arm. It is excruciating. I too have had people tell me it will lessen. One widow told me it took her 2 years to get her life back. Seems like a long time to endure this....hug to you, Cookie Cookie, I do that too about crying out sometimes. I have thoughts of wanting to just kick or punch something or toss something around, I think it would make me feel better but I don't do it. I know I resist crying now, I didn't in the past. When I feel like crying I know I sorta stamp it back. It's excruciating, just like you said. About taking 2 years for your friend to get her life back, I think that is why we have to feel what we feel when we do. We all so want this pain to stop, and people we know all expect us to have fully grieved and moved on by now. "years" is not something others want to comprehend, let alone us--the people going through it! I really hate to hear "STILL sad" "STILL grieving" "STILL crying" in reference to us, like we should have been done with all that already. Even when my sis was still here I never once felt like someone shouldn't still be sad over someones death, no matter how long ago it was. It was always very sad to me to know someone was still sad 15 or 30 years later. That's heartbreaking. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gwenivere Posted February 16, 2016 Report Share Posted February 16, 2016 17 hours ago, Cookie said: I too have had people tell me it will lessen. One widow told me it took her 2 years to get her life back. Seems like a long time to endure this.... It is a long time. I have heard the same even longer. I try to keep in mind this is the biggest, most life changing experience I will emotionally have. At almost 16 long months, weighed against 37 years, it just seems long. Also it is do hard to endure day after day. Before life had ups and downs, a balance. We don't have that now. That is the ultimate challenge. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cookie Posted February 17, 2016 Report Share Posted February 17, 2016 Gwenivere: You are so right about the lack of balance, and it takes it out of the ups and downs category to downright excruciatingly painful.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Janka Posted February 18, 2016 Report Share Posted February 18, 2016 On 16.2.2016 at 8:43 AM, Gwenivere said: It is a long time. I have heard the same even longer. I try to keep in mind this is the biggest, most life changing experience I will emotionally have. At almost 16 long months, weighed against 37 years, it just seems long. Also it is do hard to endure day after day. Before life had ups and downs, a balance. We don't have that now. That is the ultimate challenge. This is not the ultimate challenge,Gwen... Hugs from Janka Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gwenivere Posted February 19, 2016 Report Share Posted February 19, 2016 21 hours ago, Janka said: This is not the ultimate challenge,Gwen I'm afraid to ask what is. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Margm Posted February 19, 2016 Report Share Posted February 19, 2016 I don't think of it like most people, I look on it as losing my heart, losing an appendage such as both legs or both arms. Myself, I lost my heart and my backbone. I have to learn to adapt to a life that I will have to learn to walk, breath, and adjust just to make what time I have left livable. I also have to fight lions, tigers and bears, alone, oh my. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gin Posted February 19, 2016 Report Share Posted February 19, 2016 Yes, Gwen, I am afraid to ask, also. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Janka Posted February 20, 2016 Report Share Posted February 20, 2016 22 hours ago, Gin said: Yes, Gwen, I am afraid to ask, also. I´m not afraid.I believe in God. Janka Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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