MartyT

Blessings to you as well, dear one, and thank you for your kind words. You've touched my heart 🧡

Your Bucky and my Muffin could have been twins. Seeing this picture is like seeing my own dear cutie pie again! Thank you so much for sharing this with us! 🧡

My heart reaches out to you in your pain, my friend. If you have a picture of your darling Bucky, we'd love to see it. I had a cockapoo named Muffin many years ago. It was his sudden, unexpected and accidental death that set me on the path to becoming a grief counselor with a special interest in pet loss. Losing Muffin was one of the most painful experiences of my life, so believe me when I say that I know how much this hurts. I welcome you to this warm and caring site, where you are surrounded by like-minded folks. We are animal lovers all, and we've all been where you are now. You are not alone . . . 🧡

So sorry this is turning into such a hassle for you, Scott . . .

Taking A Look at The Stages of Grief

Sending healing thoughts and prayers to you, Scott, and hoping for the best. 🧡

What “CHARACTERISTIC” Do You Or Others Remember Most About Your Loved One Who Died? A special edition of the Wings ELetter will be published soon. My husband recently died and I found out a beautiful memory so many people mentioned about him. I always knew it was there, but never realized he shared it with so many. What do you or others remember MOST about your loved one? What is that special “personality trait” that made him/her special? We would love to hear from you. Please share. Include your name, city/state. Only your first name will be printed with your statement. -- Nan & Gary Zastrow nanwings1@gmail.com the Founders of: wingsgrief.org Wings--a Grief Education Ministry (1993) P.O. Box 1051, Wausau, WI 54401 Visit Wings on FACEBOOK website: wingsgrief.org

My dear, I am so sorry to learn of the sudden loss of your fiance, especially given the manner in which he died. It's good to know that you've found your way to this warm and caring place, and we welcome you with open arms and caring hearts ~ but in addition to the comfort and support you will find here, you need and deserve more. It's important to know that the circumstances surrounding the death of your beloved and the horrific images involved can have significant after-effects (nightmares, intrusive thoughts, haunting visual memories) ~ all of which can complicate your grief. Your experience calls for professional intervention with a therapist whose practice focuses on traumatic loss ~ and I hope for your sake you will seek such support. This is far too much for you to tackle all by yourself. I invite you to read this piece by Dr. Robert Neimeyer, describing the specialized procedures involved in trauma-focused grief therapy: Traumatic Images of Their Loved One's Dying See also: Finding Grief Support That Is Right For You Coping with Traumatic Loss: Suggested Resources What Is Complicated Grief?

Earlier I invited another member to read this, but you may find it helpful too: How Can The World Go On When My Loved One Has Died? ❤️

The International Day Of Hope & Healing After Loss Conference 2023 Register Today It's Free Watch 2022 Conference Here The International Day of Hope and Healing after Loss is a free online experience brought to you by The Open to Hope Foundation with the mission of helping people find hope after loss. Our expert presenters have generously donated their time, talents, and advice to share with you. Learn More Here Topics Include Long-term Complications for Children and Teens Afterlife How We Go On: Self-Compassion and The Path Forward Parent Loss Child Loss Connection Partner Loss Listen, World!” Empowering Lessons in Grief From a Woman Writer Born 100 Years Ago Sibling Loss We look forward to spending this special day with you; if you’ve lost hope, lean on ours until you find your own. Dr. Gloria and Dr. Heidi Horsley; Founders, Open to Hope Don't miss out on the happenings at opentohope.com Are You Open to Hope?

How Can The World Go On When My Loved One Has Died? ❤️

Dear one, the advice Boho-Soul has given you is spot-on, and I hope you will heed what she has said about finishing unfinished business. I also want to point you to some articles that I hope will speak to you in a helpful way. Some of the stories may differ from your own, but the information still applies. Note, too, the addirional resources listed at the base of each: Grief and The Burden of Guilt Guilt and Regret in Grief How Can The World Go On When My Loved One Has Died? Parent Loss: Continuing Their Song In Grief: Am I Making Too Much of My Grandpa's Death?

I'm so sorry to learn of the loss of your beloved companion, Deej ~ and I can say without hesitation that those you will find here DO know how much this hurts, since we've all been where you are now. The bond we have with our animal companions is very special and unique ~ as you say, they take care of us just as much as we take care of them ~ and what we share is different from the relationships we have with other people. There is an intimacy, an affection, a tolerance, a dependency, a truly loving relationship that cannot compare with any other ~ and when that relationship is interrupted by death, it brings us to our knees. It feels as if we cannot possibly go on without them. You say you don't think you can cope, but you will, and you are. Finding your way here to us is evidence of that. Here you will find the comfort, information and support that will help to get you through. It's just that this pain is unlike any you've ever had before, and it truly does seem as if you cannot bear it. That's why it helps to be among others who know and share your pain, because you learn that you are not alone. You learn that, if others have found ways to survive this unbearable pain, then you will find a way to survive it, too. It gives you hope. But right now, you need to give yourself permission to feel your pain. Think of it as testimony to the bond you have with your beloved husky. The pain you're feeling now is a measure of your love. Honor it. Feel it. Lean into it. Express it in any way that feels right to you. And most of all, know that you are not alone. We are here for you, I promise. You might find this article helpful: In Grief: When Pet Loss Feels Worse Than Person Loss ♥

RICE stands for Rest, Ice, Compression, Elevation. The RICE method includes the following four steps: Step 1: Rest. Pain is your body's signal that something is wrong. ... Step 2: Ice. Ice is a tried-and-true tool for reducing pain and swelling. ... Step 3: Compression. This means wrapping the injured area to prevent swelling. ... Step 4: Elevation.

You may find these articles helpful: Goodbye to Goodbye, by Darcie Sims and We Never Said Goodbye by Tony Falzano ❤️

I'm so sorry, Mimaka. It's good to know that you are working with a grief therapist. I hope you've read through all the posts in this thread ~ and I can only repeat what I said earlier:

Oh Cathy ~ my heart reaches out to you in your pain. I'm so sorry that, in addition to the sudden, traumatic loss of your precious daughter, you're being dragged through so much drama with her husband. Your granddaughter is just beautiful ~ and the pictures you've shared with us just take my breath away. I hope that here you will find some of the comfort and support you so richly deserve, as so many of us know firsthand what it's like to bury a child. We can also refer you to some of the many resources that are available to grandparents who find themselves in situations similar to your own. See, for example, Harriet Hodgson's informative book, So, You're Raising Your Grandkids! See also When An Adult Child Dies: Resources for Bereaved Parents You might find some of these resources mentioned in these articles helpful as well: Children and Teens in Grief: Suggested Resources Tips for Helping Children and Teens in Grief ❤️

My dear, from what you've described, it doesn't seem to me that you've let your mom down ~ not at all. So much of what has happened here is way beyond your control. As for feeling horribly guilty in the aftermath, you would do well to remember that feelings are not facts. Just because you feel guilty, it doesn't follow that you ARE guilty as charged. Surely your mom knows how much you love her, and she would be the first one to understand how little control you have in all of this. You'll find links to a number of helpful articles on this matter of fulfilling the last wishes of the dying at the base of this post: Deathbed Promises: Honoring A Mother's Dying Wish 🧡

I am so sorry to learn of your mother's serious illness, dear one, but gratified that you've found your way to this warm and caring place, where you are not alone. Here you are surrounded by kindred spirits all. You are experiencing Anticipatory Grief, which began when you recognized that your mother's illness cannot be cured and her death is coming soon. You don't say whether hospice is involved in your mother's care, but I certainly hope so ~ both for her sake and your own. I also encourage you to do some reading that I hope will speak to you in a helpful way. See Anticipatory Grief and Mourning and In Grief: After Caregiving Ends, Who Am I? You'll find links to additional resources at the base of each article. At the very least, know that we are thinking of you and here to offer whatever comfort, support and information that we can. 🧡

Thank you for the update and for the lovely wishes, Jeff. Your Christmas card design is beautiful! Clearly you are a talented artist! Sending our best wishes back to you! 🧡

I'm so sorry this happened to you and your kitten, and I hope that one day you will find a way to forgive yourself. Clearly this was an accident, not intentional on your part, and a tragic one at that. Unfortunately you are not alone ~ this happens far more often than you might think. See, for example, Curious Cats Get Killed in Clothes Dryers and Curious Cats Still Getting Killed in Clothes Dryers

Right you are, dear Kay. See Pet Loss: Is It A Different Kind of Grief? 🧡

My dear, I'm so sorry to read of the loss of your beloved Gucci. You are among kindred spirits here, as we are animal lovers all, and we know how much it hurts when we must send our precious fur babies across the Rainbow Bridge without us. See my blog post, Saying Goodbye to Beringer, along with the video posted there, and read more of my own story here: