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Like the proverbial bad penny, I'm back.  Or Jack Nicholson in the Shining.  My financial ordeal isn't over. It won't be until I win the powerball, or something else as miraculous. But it's better. For now. Until the next hiccup. I have some wonderful people in my life that are willing to perform miracles for this ole lost soul. They humble me in so many ways.  And so, life goes on for this old coot.

In just 7 short days I will have been without my beautiful wife for a year and a half. A year and a half ago on this day it was Christmas day, 2015. She died on New Year's Day, 2016. On her last Christmas the c dif was just beginning to ravage her poor, frail body. By the day after Christmas it had caused a bad bout of diarrhea. As I got to her bedside for the 10am one hour visit, her dayshift nurse was finishing up the cleanup after coming on duty and finding my wife laying in all that filth. As nasty and aromatic as it was, I can't help but wonder why the niteshift nurse hadn't noticed it, but I try not to dwell on those sorts of things. 

My Cookie and I were together for 41+ years. 2/3 of my life. She was my first and only. God broke the mold after creating her.  I still consider myself the most fortunate person that ever walked this earth that she was willing to share herself with me for those 41 years. She was a front desk manager at a motel I had gone to to apply for a job. The general manager of the motel interviewed me, and then once he was willing to hire me he told me that we needed to walk across the property from his office to where the lobby and front desk was at. As soon as we walked inside the lobby and I looked across the lobby and saw her standing there behind the counter, she owned me. Those gorgeous eyes of hers sucked me in and I was hers. It truly was love at first sight.  I got 2 jobs that day. She gave the okay to hire me for the motel job. And even better, she hired me to be her hubby.  And oh, what a gift she was. It didn't take her long to figure me out. She understood me. She was always so wonderfully supportive.  She could be so wonderfully affectionate---and not just with the bedroom sort of stuff.  To say that we were soulmates would be such an understatement. We were everything for each other. We completed each other, in so many ways. 

Cookie was the one born with a flawed body. Her health was never really strong, even back when I first met her. And it only got worse as time went by. When our time together was just beginning she was already experiencing dangerously high blood pressure.  Then, in the late 1980's she was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes. And slowly but surely it began its slow process of destroying her body. And what it didn't outright destroy, it weakened. But it NEVER affected her love of life. She was always such a happy person.  I was always awestruck by the happy sparkle that was always---always---there in her beautiful eyes. Until the last year or so when her bad health finally even destroyed that.  I was the one born with good health. I used to beg God to transfer all those health problems over onto me, but He wouldn't hear of it. 

My last 20+ working years were spent as an over-the-road truckdriver. It was a life of being gone from home the biggest part of the time, just to earn a buck.  The normal routine was to stay out for 28 or so days, then park the truck for 3-4 quick days off. Then hit the repeat button, and start the same process all over again.  By the fall of 2010 the time had finally arrived for us to talk about what we were going to do to provide her with a caregiver. And to me there was only one person qualified for that job. I had no kind of caregiver training.  Absolutely no kind of medical background. But I knew I had an immense amount of love for the patient I would have, and I knew that somehow that love would give me the patience and willingness to do every part of the caregiver "job".  It really never was a job. It was a blessing to be able to be there for my bride. That lady that I still had a crush on, even after all those years. Heck, even today as I sit here typing this I still have a crush on her. I just got goosebumps on my arms just typing that and thinking about all those years together. 

So, somehow life goes on. I of course have absolutely no idea how much longer I will continue living. But I do know I will continue loving her every day until God finally allows me to be with her again. I will continue to miss her physical presence every day. She is with me in so many ways even now, but oh how I miss being able to wrap my arms around her and look into her eyes and tell her I love her. 

Sorry for getting so long winded here folks. I never was able to say anything in one word or less.  I hope and pray that all my friends here are well---as well as can be expected at least considering what this group is all about. 

And I still continue to put one foot in front of the other...


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Darrel, I always enjoy reading each and everyone's love stories.  Billy was a blind date, sort of, his best friend was the boyfriend of my good friend at the school we were attending.  He came to the Christmas party and right away he told Judy "She is for Billy."  So, he called Billy and I could not go that night, I had another date.  He told me "you don't know what your missing."  No, it was not love at first talking to.  I had asked Judy if he was any better looking than her boyfriend and she said, "no, not really."  Well, I did not want to go cause I did not care for the looks of her boyfriend.  But, we finally got together.  I had a boy-friend, not a boyfriend, take me to the dance I was to meet Billy at so I could make a quick exit if things did not go okay.  Instead, I met a taller Steve McQueen look-a-like, and I told the other boy that I was okay, so he went home.  Then he was mine for 55 more years, 54 of them married.  And that's all.........

Glad your back Darrel, I love to hear each of you tell about your mates.

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I'm glad things are going well for you.  Thank you for sharing your love story with us, I love hearing how people met and their early days of falling in love.

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