My Sanity Needed Vents

[Gwenivere]

22 hours ago, KarenK said:

 Hopefully the doctor's opinion will carry some weight. Surely OT can see that you're not able to be alone yet and will speak for you.

That is what I am hoping too.  Right now I want to know what the X-rays say about what healing has happened up to 3 weeks ago.  I thought OT discharging me didn’t  look good.  PT says that’s not the case.  That if I build more core strength it’s not something that will be factored in.  Unless I find something I will have trouble with.
 

I called the surgeon's office.  X-rays are probably days away.  Hopefully by the 4th when I have an appointment.  Asked if he would write a letter to my insurance I’m not ready to be discharged to both here and them.
 

Got woken up early today by the wound team for the bed sores.  Lost about 45 minutes sleep.  I was wondering yesterday what it would be today.  They really want me to sleep on the opposite side, which makes sense, but I have such a hard time doing that.  Creates a different pain.  I’m so sensitive to pain that anything is magnified.  Got my B12 shot and it hurt when it never has.  Something is going on with my feet.  I’m guessing more nerve stuff.
 

The insurance guy here told me we do the appeal today.  I’m confused as he said he knows they will turn it down and I will have to make a phone call.  He said I won’t get discharged so I’m very confused.  It was hard for me to understand being so tired and on these meds.  He seemed frustrated.  My attitude is try doing what I am and let’s see how you react.  
 

Guess I don’t have to wonder one way my day will get complicated.  I’m sure there will be something else.  I walked more today on top of the being jostled around by that wound team, so I expect a tough physical day.  If I do try sleeping on the opposite side, that will take a lot of prep. Getting up and back in will be a challenge.

Off to it.  Love to all.  💕

[kayc]

6 hours ago, Gwenivere said:

My attitude is try doing what I am and let’s see how you react.  

I wish they had more empathy.  It seems these people do not.
I just saw this and thought how much I've aged in 12 1/2 years!  I was still young and beautiful then.  In my 50s.  How did this happen?  I feel so alone and on my own, that's because I very much am.

I look at your situation, Gwen, you're younger than I am!  So unfair.  I don't ask for trips to Hawaii and fun, just "normal."  I know you do the same.  Survival, that's the mode we've been in for so long.

Marg, I'm glad you have contact with your kids, it's been a long time since I've felt mine cared.  My last discussion with my son did not go well.  He has no clue what this is like, none.  My daughter either or she'd call.

 

[nashreed]

Annette was never able to have children. We used to joke about all the mental and physical issues that poor child would have had. 

There was a discussion on The View about anxiety and mental health and how it's more out in the open and accepted as a real medical condition. Not in my house! With the mental issues I inherited from my Mom, she is so dismissive of what I go through- how I still can't face getting a job. There is pretty much nothing but face to face customer service jobs here, for the unskilled and undereducated. I had a massive nervous breakdown and walked out of the last retail job I had- at Christmastime (2010). She still thinks "Oh, it's all in your head, you can get over it", when she hardly ever leaves the house due to agoraphobia, which I have to a lesser degree. Combined with the grief of two losses, that we never talk about, she just does not understand me anymore. She just wants me to be like I was when I was 10. And I never ever can talk about anything remotely personal with my brother. He could care less about me as a person- he just wants a sounding board to talk about what he's interested in. He's really a sad, selfish person, and I see way too much of myself in him. 

I wish I didn't have to survive. It's just diminishing returns at this point. 

[Gwenivere]

5 hours ago, kayc said:

I look at your situation, Gwen, you're younger than I am!  So unfair.  I don't ask for trips to Hawaii and fun, just "normal."  I know you do the same.  Survival, that's the mode we've been in for so long.

I’m not that far behind you.  Facing 67 this year.  Absolutely astounded at how my body has changed in the last 5-10 years.  Especially the last 4.  I’m stuck in it.  It’s certainly not one I would seek out.  I spent my life being as active as I could.  I did smoke, the worst habit ever.  But that didn’t do my back in nor my thyroid.  It certainly didn’t cause the panic disorder.  My lung condition was genetic that kicked in late and smoking didn’t help.  Still looks good to me, but I can’t imagine doing it.  
 

This is definitely survival mode.  It’s not normal in any way.  Survival mode is exhausting.  I don’t know if it’s even possible for me to ever go back to ‘normal'.  I don’t see how.  Can’t turn back time.  We are compelled to go forward.  In my head I can get up and do what I want.  As soon as I try to get up, I find it’s not possible.  The reality.  My normal contained Steve, so how could it?  I don’t know how to make another.  I’ve been living a different life, but empty and cold.  I’m breathing and heart is beating so that’s as close to living as I get.

[nashreed]

At least you do have a friend who is there for you Gwen. I don't have that. I would do anything to take your pain away. I wish only the best for you Gwen. You have a goal- to go home. Don't give up on that goal! You inspire me, even though you don't feel that you are. It's important to me that there's at least life out there that I have a little participation in. I'm there with you in my thoughts Gwen. I know it's the worst possible time to be in a rehab facility.

 

[Gwenivere]

Well, I had written a long post.  I managed to cut it while trying to copy it so I wouldn’t lose it.  Really fit my day and so many frustrations that piled up.  Normally I’d try and recreate most of it, but it was rehashing and a lot of stuff you’ve all read before, just different whines.  
 

Had to appeal insurance trying to send me home too soon.  An hour on the phone with gmail that messed up my account to get fixed that they screwed up.  The doc here cutting my pain meds wen I’m in more pain than I was last time and fight every day here not knowing if I’m hurting myself or not.  Can’t find out from my doc as the X-rays are in the snail mail and don’t know when he will get them.  Things could be getting worse until I know if things look structurally sound.  Meds got messed up as the pain ones are being cut back.  Usual sticky web of opiates and addiction.  Tho I’ve never asked for extra when I could have.  Bedsores have to be changed everyday and I can’t do it. There’s more, but I babbled about it once already and it went poof!  
 

James, I am grateful for my friend, but she can’t fix any of this.  But I understand what you mean.  There’s never a good time to be in rehab.  Covid stuff is 2nd nature now.  No human touch or knowing what people I see daily look like.  My goal may not be obtainable.  A fear I try to hope is not true.  If it helps you, then I feel good I am giving something to someone who needs it.  I know you struggle so much. 💕

Going to try sleeping again on my odd side.  Was tough getting comfortable but did relieve some pressure.  Next will be is if I can get up without the help of an adjustable bed.  Almost fell out this morning being so small and half asleep.  
 

Best to all. ❤️
 

 

 

[kayc]

19 hours ago, nashreed said:

Annette was never able to have children.

PCOS?  I had it, it's related to Diabetes, I wasn't diagnosed diabetic yet but I was PCOS so I guess my body was programmed for diabetes long before diagnosis...I had an eye doctor tell me in my early 20s I would be, long before any signs of it, he must have seen something in my eyes that told him that.  I didn't think I could have kids, only ovulated once or twice/year, makes it hard to know, also no regularity compounds it.  I had to see fertility specialists for five years before getting a child, took Rx to help it along, lost three before getting one.  

19 hours ago, nashreed said:

With the mental issues I inherited from my Mom, she is so dismissive of what I go through- how I still can't face getting a job.

It seems you should qualify for disability but you'd have to have a doctor on board willing to back you up.  So many don't want to bother with it, but if you find the right one!

I'm sorry your mom and brother don't understand and aren't more supportive, what a difference that'd make!

Gwen, I definitely feel I'm in survival mode, I can't begin to imagine how it feels to YOU, you have everything so much harder.  At least I'm able to live with my pain, it prohibits my using my hands much of the time or for certain activities but yours...yours is unbearable.  I didn't realize you'll be turning 67, I must have lost a year somewhere, I'm turning 70 in a few months and very aware of it.  Time is passing by...

I'm supposed to do set up for a community luncheon Friday and prepare salad for ten and wait on and clean up from it Saturday and go to my grandson's fifth bdy party Sunday...now they're saying it'll snow again.  NO!!!  This is why I don't like to have plans in the winter!  Those who live in the valley or even down in Oakridge do not understand my life up here.  I just have to get through the winter and then hope this summer is not a repeat of last summer.

Masking is not going to be required here after Mar. 19.  I will continue to wear one in public places (Winco, etc.) and it's up to business owners whether they're required in their business.  Willing to bet the post office and banks continue to require them.

 

[nashreed]

I'm not sure I ever mentioned it, Kay, but I am on disability. I have been since 2016. It took a lawyer and going to court and two years. I can pay my bills and contribute what I can to the household, but my family makes me feel like a useless sack of crap for not being employed. My Mom not as much, but she is a master of the passive aggressive implied insult. She thinks I should be over my grief, and has no true understanding of what I went through to get disability and how much counseling and trying every antidepressant/anxiety medication it took. I was in another state, and of course, she never really wanted to talk about it.  

I don't know the exact particulars of what Diabetes did to Annette's body when she was a teenager other than she already had been through menopause when we met. She was diagnosed at around 12 and only had a year of periods. 

I really don't understand the lifting of mask mandates all of a sudden. It's supposed to be ok for vaccinated people to not wear them but unvaccinated people still have to. Sure- the unvaccinated are going to be good and wear them. They're the ones that never have. I still wear mine in stores and who knows when I'll not wear it. After losing my father in law to COVID, who was only 80, I am not giving it to my Mom, who is 85. That's one of the reasons I still haven't gotten a part time job. I'm in no hurry. I have a very bad addiction to buying CD's online, and it really doesn't matter now that I do- I can't undo the guilt I feel for spending money on stuff when I should have spent it on Annette. I come from a selfish, self-centered family. I always was always collecting stuff. One of my worst addictions was to the first laserdiscs (remember those?) released- dating back to 1978. It was fun, but it took money away from Annette's care I'm sure. I guess it was a distraction from the stress of caring for her. All the pain she was in. I was working then, and spending stupid money on "the hunt". Some of these laserdiscs (Discovision's) only had 3 known copies to exist- crazy stuff. There are a handful of hardcore collectors of them that I was in communication with. Friends, I guess, but it ended when I had to sell the best of the collection. Some movies I had 10 copies of, because they would be sold in big lots, and you had to buy them all to get one you really needed. Idiot. A lot of regrets. I guess I could have been a gambling addict. That's worse. 

[Gwenivere]

8 hours ago, nashreed said:

I guess it was a distraction from the stress of caring for her. All the pain she was in. I was working then, and spending stupid money on "the hunt".

I don’t know what to say to help on that.  Everyone we know can forgive us, but it take’s forgiving ourselves that matters.  Maybe you can 'talk' to Annette and knowing her, feel what she would say about it.  I bought things more as a caregiver cause I needed some comfort for myself under the strain.
 

5 hours ago, kayc said:

yours is unbearable.  I didn't realize you'll be turning 67, I must have lost a year somewhere, I'm turning 70 in a few months and very aware of it.  Time is passing by...

knew a couple that had to do some very intense treatments to have kids too.  After I lost 2 and had to have a D&C twice for one, we were offered a surgical solution.  We decided to go with nature.  There are times I wish we had kids, but found it wasn’t a make or break deal for us. I’m not very comfortable around kids never having any.  Maybe I would have adapted, but I saw how it changed my friend dynamics.  We filled our years with adventures that we couldn’t have had.  Both sides have pros and cons.  I really am missing my own parents.  I was very close to them.  Not all parent/children ones are.  I’ve heard many parents say how they never see theirs even if distance isn’t a factor.   

Kay, time is definitely passing by.  I’m starting to feel it mentally now.  Being surrounded by medical stuff to function makes it impossible to ignore.  I’m not having the thoughts of stuff I’d like to do.  I feel I’ve given up as the fight has too many extra innings.  I don’t know who to even talk to anymore.  I think that’s why counseling has stalled.  So pulled inward.  Don’t feel anyone would want to hear how I truly feel.  If I could avoid me, I would.  
 

I totally spaced out writing Dee last night.  That is part of my getting ready for bed routines.  That is so unlike me.  All the stuff that happened Friday took a toll.  I don’t know how I was protecting myself from all the fears and 'lost in my head' speculations.  All I know is it doesn’t work anymore.  
 

PT was the usual walk.  I was so discouraged.  I wound up crying.  My therapist wasn’t gifted in consolation, didn’t know what to do.  Not long after getting back, I got the call from my insurance that they declined my appeal to stay longer.  I seem to recall the guy here say he expected that.  It’s harder to walk without assistance, wounds that require skilled nursing and the surgeon hasn’t seen the X-rays which are getting outdated with these extra weeks.  I don’t even think the walker is helping.  I can’t get enough stance to put more weight on it.  What was really hard was the woman that called sounded like she was reading a script and very cold.  It would have been better delivered if she could have at least said I’m sorry to tell you…..but…..  Never was good at starkly telling people bad news, but since my joining the grief club, even more so.  
 

So, don’t know how to handle the next couple of days.  Sunday should be calmer, but Monday things are going to really kick in on this insurance thing.  I wish I could not care, but don’t have that luxury.  I was hoping I’d just have to figure how to tolerate a shower since things feel worse.  Off to TV.  Hope all have a good Sunday.

💕

[Widow2015]

1 hour ago, Gwenivere said:

don’t know how to handle the next couple of days.  Sunday should be calmer, but Monday things are going to really kick in on this insurance thing.  I wish I could not care, but don’t have that luxury.  I was hoping I’d just have to figure how to tolerate a shower since things feel worse.

Oh Gwen:  Was so hoping the call from insurance representative would be in your favor.  Keeping you in my thoughts as you battle with your options.  I would not know where to start if I were in your situation.  Life can be so unfair.  Hugs, Dee

[KarenK]

Dee,

Was hoping you would be checking in. I'm thinking your first cataract surgery is on the 28th. My second surgery is that day. On my pre op visit, the doctor said I have 20/20 distance vision in my right eye now. He expects the left eye will end up the same and I won't need distance glasses, just my cheap ones for reading. We shall see. Good luck whenever your surgery is.

Gwen,

I was also thinking those X-Rays are outdated now, fault of the rehab for not sending them weeks ago. You need more recent ones for accuracy. Sure hope you can hold off the insurance denial until this is done.

Thinking of you

[kayc]

18 hours ago, nashreed said:

I really don't understand the lifting of mask mandates all of a sudden

I don't see that it will change that much as many don't wear theirs around their family/friends anyway and people will still continue to wear them in the stores, etc. that require them.  What I do expect are outbreaks from sporting events and other large crowds since they're outside, they won't likely wear them voluntarily.  But if you're squeezed in  with thousands of other people, it stands to reason someone's going to have it unknowingly or otherwise and pass it on.  I'd avoid crowds.  Not sure we'll ever be "back to normal."  Normal seems to be gone anymore.

8 hours ago, Gwenivere said:

it take’s forgiving ourselves

And that's the challenge.  I've found these links to be helpful:
Guilt and Regret in Grief
Grief and the Burden of Guilt
Guilt In the Wake of a Parent's Death
Address Guilt When Grieving
and this video is helpful as well:

 

[kayc]

8 hours ago, Gwenivere said:

I got the call from my insurance that they declined my appeal to stay longer.

Wow.  I wonder what they expect you to do.  How can some people be so cold...I guess they turn off compassion to carry out their duties.  Reminds me of the ER Vet that misdiagnosed my King George (cat) as having a cold when he really had cancer...he went through his last month with intense suffering needlessly.  I can't forgive them, esp. since I called them later and told them and they did NOT care!  I'd never take an animal there again, never!  Main St. in Springfield, still there.  Not only that, they charged three times as much a my regular vet for the antibiotic, which did no good.  I couldn't NOT have compassion on people OR animals!

 

[kayc]

5 hours ago, KarenK said:

I'm thinking your first cataract surgery is on the 28th. My second surgery is that day.

Thinking of both of you as you head into your cataract surgeries.  20/20, I cannot imagine!  Haven't had that since I was a little girl.  Good luck to both of you!

Gwen, keep us posted, still hoping for a miracle...

[Widow2015]

10 hours ago, KarenK said:

Dee,

Was hoping you would be checking in. I'm thinking your first cataract surgery is on the 28th. My second surgery is that day. On my pre op visit, the doctor said I have 20/20 distance vision in my right eye now. He expects the left eye will end up the same and I won't need distance glasses, just my cheap ones for reading. We shall see. Good luck whenever your surgery is.

Karen: Good to read your surgery was so successful.  Hoping the second eye does as well for you.  My surgery is scheduled March 7 on my left eye which is the eye with macular degeneration.  I know this surgery won't change my central vision on that eye but peripheral vision may improve.  My pre opt appointment was this past Friday.  Since I didn't know what to expect at the appointment I was anxious but of course I worried needlessly.  I was happy to learn I will be given a relaxant drug prior surgery.  The complete month of March is medical appointments; even a dental and dermatologist appointment thrown in.  Looking forward to Spring. lol

I have to share ..... a couple of weeks ago as I was closing my blinds, I thought I saw something move outside ... now remember, I can't see very clearly.... as I stood and focused and didn't move I could see there were 6 young deer feasting on my potted plants right next to my window.   Such a beautiful sight.  Would be wonderful to be able to see well enough again to see more of them and be able to drive again. 

Good luck on your second surgery.  Hugs, Dee   

[KarenK]

Dee, don't know where my brain came up with the 28th for your surgery? Yes, you get an IV during surgery with a relaxer. He also put lidocaine in mine because of my chronic cough(a bad idea to cough during surgery). Plus the nurse constantly puts drops in your eye during surgery, partly for numbing, I guess. Sure hope your vision improves to where you can see your beautiful surroundings more clearly.

I made my dermatologist appt. for April. My broken teeth are on hold for a while unless they start to hurt. Hard to keep up with all the failing parts on these old bodies.  lol

[Widow2015]

1 minute ago, KarenK said:

Dee, don't know where my brain came up with the 28th for your surgery? Yes, you get an IV during surgery with a relaxer. He also put lidocaine in mine because of my chronic cough(a bad idea to cough during surgery). Plus the nurse constantly puts drops in your eye during surgery, partly for numbing, I guess. Sure hope your vision improves to where you can see your beautiful surroundings more clearly.

I made my dermatologist appt. for April. My broken teeth are on hold for a while unless they start to hurt. Hard to keep up with all the failing parts on these old bodies.  lol

Karen:  Not to worry about remembering my surgery date.  Goodness, I can't remember if I brushed my teeth some days. lol  Yes, keeping the old body running is exhausting.  Keep us posted on your surgery and I will do the same if I can.  Don't know what I'll be able to see the next day ??  My son will take the day off for the surgery, and I will have a non-emergency driver take me to the post op the next day.  I have been using the same service for all of my appointments so trust the company.  The young man that picked me up Friday for my pre opt was so nice, he apologized every time he hit a hole/bump in the road.  So nice and caring.  Best thoughts going out to you.  Hugs, Dee

[KarenK]

Dee, my eye was blurry for about 10 days, a little less each day. Never any pain. I accidentally started to rub it one morning when I was half asleep. It let me know real quick that was a no no. My son has been switching days off for all my appts. It's hard for him as he works nights and normally sleeps days, but he has made do in addition to doing our shopping and errands which he has been doing since Covid began.

[Widow2015]

20 minutes ago, KarenK said:

Dee, my eye was blurry for about 10 days, a little less each day. Never any pain. I accidentally started to rub it one morning when I was half asleep. It let me know real quick that was a no no. My son has been switching days off for all my appts. It's hard for him as he works nights and normally sleeps days, but he has made do in addition to doing our shopping and errands which he has been doing since Covid began.

 I hope I will be able to remember not to rub my eye(s), as well as get myself dressed decently for post op appointments.    My son's fiancé, Heidi,  will take me to second surgery.  With their kids and their doctor appointments, I told them I could manage without them on the post op appointments.  I didn't want them to give up vacation days for my follow up appointments.  Thanks for the timeline on what to expect with healing.  Heidi has been doing my grocery shopping since I stopped driving.  I am so hopeful I can relieve her of this chore, although she says she doesn't mind.  Just hate being dependent.  You are blessed your son is with you.  Will just have to keep on trying to do the best we can.  Dee

[Gwenivere]

Wishing the best for both you, Dee and Karen, on the eye surgeries.  I would have loved to see the deer.  To only need reading gasses would be great.  I miss more peripheral vision now that I can’t turn my head as far.  I started noticing it driving.  I’m so glad you have such caring children.  I know it’s hard to be dependent, but it isn’t something you expected from them.  They clearly deeply love you and that is a wonderful gift. 💕

12 hours ago, KarenK said:

I was also thinking those X-Rays are outdated now, fault of the rehab for not sending them weeks ago. You need more recent ones for accuracy. Sure hope you can hold off the insurance denial until this is done.

I know the X-rays are outdated.  Supposedly the denial will be held off by the bedsores at least.  I’m still worried about the walking pain.  That’s why I’m so leery on these walks.  No feedback from the surgeon since this was done.  I’m getting very impatient for him to get them.  He’ll at least get an idea of how things looked in February after a month of doing PT.  A woman whose title I’m not sure of came by and started talking about the denial and got me all upset again.  I couldn’t really convey what I was told last week as it’s a blur now.  She finally said we leave this in Scott’s hands and didn’t know the ins and outs of these situations.  Last year I got an extra week.  But at this very moment I have no idea where I stand.  
 

It’s a paralyzing state to be in.  I don’t want to panic pack.  I did tell Dee to keep Tuesday open.  This stress is manifesting in many ways.  I can barely write and signing my name often a scrawl.   It’s another way to be reminded of it.  
 

I haven’t had my estrogen in 3 days.  Some of this anxiety is that as far as feeling hot and chills. I asked again why this wasn’t ordered when it was getting low and got all kind of excuses.  Even a pharmacy renewal, the most common answer, only takes a day.  We aren’t in rural country here.  
 

Got woken up yesterday morning by housekeeping at 7am.  Burst in here,  turned on the lights and were moving trash cans around.  I asked them twice to leave but they didn’t understand English well.  Wound up screaming at them to get out.  The nurse wanted to know what happened when I woke up.  Said she wanted to ‘talk'. about it so I was prepared for a fight.  Turns out they were going into others rooms that slept in also.  
 

Time to head for a long night.  Triple duty. Pain, will go by too fast with the missing meds getting up and not knowing what happens to me.  If I were wealthy I could tell my insurance to screw off. How I wish I could.

[V. R.]

Gwen, my heart really goes out to you, for all the pain and discomfort for your going through. I hope you will soon be ready to be dismissed and get back to your home, I'm sure you will be able to find some home- help to get you through this difficult time. Lots of hugs. 

Karen and Dee, wishing you both all the very  best for your eye surgery. My mother has had one eye done so far (quite a few years back). She has no regrets, a real success. She should have surgery for the other eye too, but she just hasn't bothered yet, also because in these past two Covid years, our health system has become much more bureaucratic than usual, more paperwork, longer waiting times. Enough to make you change your mind and postpone everything  until later. 

Always a pleasure talking to you all. 

Enza

[Widow2015]

1 hour ago, Gwenivere said:

Got woken up yesterday morning by housekeeping at 7am.  Burst in here,  turned on the lights and were moving trash cans around.  I asked them twice to leave but they didn’t understand English well.  Wound up screaming at them to get out.  The nurse wanted to know what happened when I woke up.  Said she wanted to ‘talk'. about it so I was prepared for a fight.  Turns out they were going into others rooms that slept in also.  
 

Gwen:   How awful this place is !!!  I'm keeping you in my thoughts as you face another day.    Thank you for your good wishes for my upcoming event.  I wish your situation was as easy as mine is supposed to be.  Hugs, Dee

[kayc]

18 hours ago, Widow2015 said:

I could see there were 6 young deer feasting on my potted plants right next to my window.   Such a beautiful sight.

Oh Dee, I hope you do get more vision back!  That is indeed a special sight.  They come into my back yard all the time, but not up close to my house, my patio is up in the air with a railed 40 ft. ramp coming to the driveway.  Have only had one make it up the ramp once, years ago, when we had a case of apples on the deck...we had to guide the deer down the ramp so it didn't bolt down the stairs and break a leg!  They aren't known for their levelheadedness.  When I had my ramp rebuilt, I had him dispense with the stairs, they really were rather treacherous, esp. when icy, I could have lost my son when I was 5 months pregnant and fell, hitting my tailbone on each step on the way down...the doctor said he was pretty well seated to not lose him!

 

17 hours ago, Widow2015 said:

My son will take the day off for the surgery, and I will have a non-emergency driver take me to the post op the next day. 

Wow, I didn't know they had such services!  Not up here.  I have to drive myself or get a friend to do it.  

Wishing you well today, Karen!

Enza, I'm sorry to hear everything is bureaucratic there as well, not sure things will ever go back to how they used to be, I don't see it.  Medical has become a nightmare.  I still have my throat condition for 14 months now and have yet to have a doctor care enough to do a biopsy or even look down it!  Seems I'll live with it for life unless it kills me.

 

[KarenK]

Second cataract surgery is done. A little rougher than the first because of the contraption used to hold the eye open. Underneath eye swollen. Kind of look like I've been in a bar fight and I don't even remember ordering a drink. lol  All in all, I think it went well. Will know in about 10 days.

No laughing too hard here but.....while getting in place on the operating table, I reinjured the shoulder that I fell on a few nights ago. They put a pillow under my arm during surgery. Not exactly fun trying to pull myself up into the truck for the trip home. I really need to quit falling down!

[Gwenivere]

Just too many complications going on for everyone.   I know people go thru things all the time, but they don’t know each other.  Our little group is getting slammed pretty hard.  
 

Glad you are done, Karen.  Yes, stopping falling is an excellent goal.  Don’t want to ruin your'fun', but you have to grow up someday.  😁