Starting the grief journey

[NRCnKC]

(I wrote this a couple days ago, and logged in last night and thought I had updated it, but apparently it did not stick. Callie made a major turn around on Saturday Friday evening and after discussing with out vet, we have decided to wait and see if she continues to hold. I am still anxious about it all. But she is still with us for now. Thank you everyone for your well wishes and thoughts. I will be back for certain when the time comes that we do have to put Callie to rest. I am trying to be realistic, and yet also hopeful.)

 

I am just beginning the grief process at the loss of my wonderful companion of six years, Callie. I have an appointment tomorrow at 11 AM at my veterinary clinic to have her put to rest. We had hoped to do an in-home euthanasia but due to how busy they are and the timing, it’s just not going to be possible logistically.

I’m already beside myself with grief. I think already of all the wonderful memories of her life well lived in our time together and worry terribly how empty my home is going to feel without her. She has been dealing with chronic kidney disease for five years and we knew this day would come. However, two weeks ago we had an appointment for her and all of her lab results were actually excellent. Two days later she started a urinary tract infection and we have been fighting it ever since with antibiotics. This time was different as there were two different types of bacteria So we had to do two different anabiotic’s, one which was in pill form. She has always loved the idea of being killed. So that was a rough week for the anabiotic. The antibiotics killed all the good bacteria in her gut and she has not eaten in about nine days. She has been off the anabiotic for three days and her appetite has not returned.

She is not in physical discomfort that we can tell, but she is very very anxious and constantly wanting food even though no matter what I give her whether it was her prescription food or human food she won’t eat very much of it. She is getting slower and slower and more anxious. We believe that since she has not had any real nutrition for about 10 days that her liver is now giving up.

I know that is probably more detail than anyone really ever wanted, but I felt like I needed to get it out. With other situations in my life and the craziness of the pandemic, the timing of this just really sucks so horribly. Not that there would ever be a good time.

My mother went home to be with Christ a year ago unexpectedly and I am just now starting to feel like I’m climbing out of the hole from that grief. I’m just worried what this all looks like. The thought of coming home to an empty house full of memories of Callie is really hard to get my mind around  

thanks for listening.

 

[MartyT]

I'm so sorry to learn of your precious Callie's serious illness, and my heart reaches out to you as you face what will happen tomorrow. Please know that we are thinking of you, and will be here to offer comfort, support and understanding as you find your way through it all. ♥️

[GMS]

NRCnKC I'm so very sorry to hear about Callie. She is a beatiful girl. I'm sure you will do what you know is best for her and you can always come here to share your feelings with others who can understand what you are going through.

Gregg

[Gracie4ever]

I'm so sorry to hear about Callie. It was a month ago today that I had to let my girl rest. I feel your pain. Please know that we understand and that you can come here and express your feelings anytime you want. We are here for you and this is a safe place. 

Susan

[kayc]

I am so sorry about the loss of your Callie.  I hope you will update us on how you are doing...I know when I lost my Arlie to cancer it was one of the hardest things I've ever been through, that and the loss of my husband George.  Kitty went 4 1/2 months later at the age of 25, her kidneys and liver had both shut down but the euthanasia went peacefully and I hope Callie's did as well.  My heart goes out to you, it may be a while before you feel up to talking about it but we're here when you're ready.  Sending you comforting thoughts and prayers.

[amboehlen]

I'm so sorry to hear this. My baby boy struggled with kidney disease for a few years as well. I'm so happy to hear that Callie has been feeling a little better!

I'm starting the grieving process as well so please reach out if you ever need to talk. We had to put my baby down unexpectedly yesterday so my husband and I are also beginning this journey.

[kayc]

Hi, I'm sorry yet another person is going through this, I lost my Miss Mocha in 2016, my Arlie in 2019 and my Kitty this year, I put my response on your thread.