My Wish For All Of You Today

[LarrysGirl]

I wish for this family of friends I have on this site, a day of wonderful memories, the strength to make it thru this day without the one we love, and some peace and comfort to continue on this journey. Deborah

[Corinne]

Deborah,

I wish the same for you and all of my family here!

Hugs & prayers,

Corinne

[lorikelly]

I wish the same for you and all of my friends here. Lori

[Stallyn]

Bless you Deborah, it helped top come here and read this, many hugs!

[Corinne]

Hi William,

How are you doing today? I did really good, the girls and I had chicken and meatloaf, they will not eat turkey. The problem is I promised them they could put up the Christmas tree this afternoon. I am trying to make it a good day for them. I was fine until they pulled out ornaments they had bought for their Daddy and I just lost it. It is soooo hard to keep my spirits up for them. Please pray for God to give me the strength I need to make this holiday season a good one for them.

Hus & prayers,

Corinne

P.S. Did you take your meds today?

[Stallyn]

Corinne,

I am doing ok as long I don't think about my plight, has been difficult, peace has encompassed me somehow, I only imagine the tree and ornaments are a sad reminder, but you are handling it fine today, it would be nice if we could sleep until the holidays are over LOL, I will pray for you, that peace will abound right now, there will be comfort in the life around you, I pray for a sign for you. Thanks for posting to me, I felt so lonely today, I did take my meds

(((((((((HUGS)))))))))

Your friend,

William

[Corinne]

Thanks William! You know it is so strange I was with my two girls all day and my sister and her family stopped by for about 1 hr. but I still felt so alone.

Hugs & prayers,

Corinne

[Corinne]

William,

I forgot to ask. Are you feeling any better today? You said your Chrones was acting up yesterday.

Hugs & prayers,

Corinne

[Stallyn]

Corinne,

I know, we can be in a room of people and feel so alone, we are a different part of society where no one understands our loss.

I am feeling better today, the chrohns has slowed down a bit, every anniversary day of the month and now holidays I get sick. Does it happen to you?

[Art]

Deborah,

Thanks to you and all for the wishes. It was my first Thanksgiving without my Charlene and it was really tough. We were always used to having a big get together with family and friends and of course the big dinner. This year just the two daughters and son-in-law at daughter's house. I tried to enjoy it mostly for their sake, but it just wasn't right. I am really feeling worse tonight than today. I guess its just that it forces me to realize how truly lonely I am. I have to say though coming here helps to know I'm not alone and for that I am truly thankful.

[WendyJ]

Hey everyone, sounds like most of us made it through today. I was not as concerned about today as Christmas but it did seem sad sitting there looking around the table and not seeing Steve with the rest of us. Actually as I am writing this I think it is just starting to hit me. You know what bothered me today? Not one person asked how I was doing today with it being the first Holiday without Steve. Part of me was dreading if someone asked because I knew I would start crying and another part of me felt hurt that nobody thought to ask? Sounds weird I know ! Do they think I am over it by now? Are they afraid to ask?

Love,

Wendy

[DesertBob]

Wendy,

I'm sure it's very hard for them to know whether they should bring it up or not and people I think tend to default to assuming that it's better for you to get your mind off it. I had dinner with friends today and I know they invited me over because of me being alone, but no one brought up the issue and I did not make them uncomfortable by discussing it. It was, after all, supposed to be a pleasant family occasion for them. I took no offense and was just grateful for being included.

--Bob

[WendyJ]

I know your right Bob and I know how much my family just adored Steve and how much they missed him there yesterday too, I just feel like in a way he was forgotten. I know he wasn't it is just my sadness thinking that way. Thanks for your input, sometimes it just helps to hear it from someone else.

Love,

Wendy

[DesertBob]

Oh, I understand. A world with Linda subtracted from it is so wrong, so obscene, that I can't get my brain around it. I know that better than anyone else. I'm sure it's the same with your Steve. Part of you demands that the rest of the world be mourning in sackcloth and ashes. How dare they so much as smile?!

But even though it seems like it, the world doesn't go on exactly as if nothing happened. People just keep their own pain private, and often, "deal" with it by not looking at it.

To better days than this,

--Bob

[Gail_R]

Wendy well you made the first big holiday without Steve give yourself a big hug. Because God knows how hard that was for you. In Canada we had our thanksgiving in Oct. and that was hard for me also but like you I made it through it. Like you I feel bad or upset I guess is a better word when people don't say anything about Bruce and like you if they do it makes me cry so guess sometimes people are not sure what to say so they nothing . Just know that you are not alone we will be here to help each other through the next big holiday and many more that will be coming. Gail

[WendyJ]

Hey Gail thanks for your so kind words, you are such a good friend. Yes I got through it, but I was not dreading it as much as I am Christmas. I just wish the media would have at least waited till the calendar said December before they started bombarding us. Even the newspapers are so thick with fliers it is nuts ! How are you doing Gail, okay?

Love,

Wendy

Derek my friend I don't know where you have been but I have not heard from you since you took Carson to Six Flags. Is everything okay?

[Corinne]

Wendy,

I am glad you made it through Thanksgiving. I did good until I had to let the girls put up the Christmas tree, it was sssooooo hard but they are still young and I have to some how muster up the strength to make it a fun Christmas for them no matter how much I just want to hide from the holiday. Are you taking your meds?

It has been a while since we heard from Derek, I am hoping it means he and Carson are doing well.

Hugs & prayers,

Corinne

William,

Are you taking your meds? Are you feeling better now? I usually end up feeling lousy on the holidays also.

Hugs & prayers,

Corinne

[Stallyn]

Corinne,

We made it though one holiday I feel ok, been taking the meds, even though my chrohns is being a pain. Oh well...

Love,

William

[WendyJ]

Oh Corinne how did you do it? I am dreading putting up the tree with the star that my husband made on top. I don't have small children anymore so I am sure you had that push to make you get it done. I almost wish in a way I had that because I don't know what is going to give me that push. I am glad you made it through Thanksgiving too, yes I took my meds. I hear Derek everynight telling me to in a very firm voice and if I don't hear him I hear you ! Thanks !!!

Love,

Wendy

[suzanne]

Well we made it through Thanksgiving. I had a good one, went out to eat with my mother, went to see the Rockettes Christmas show, was beautiful but so lonely without my husband and my dad.

William

So worried about you. Please take your meds. I have not had my computer at home for almost 3 weeks. Like a lifeline had been broken, but have been reading each post during work time when I could. You are all so much my friends and I have missed you and thankful for this family.

Suzanne

[Corinne]

Wendy,

It was extremely hard to do. If it was not for the girls I don't know if I could have done it. The girls are still so young and I have to keep the spirit of Christmas alive for them. I am happy to hear you made it through Thanksgiving OK.

Today was another hard day. I took the girls over to my brother's house to put John's cross in his woods(I had made a cross for John when he died so the girls had a place to go talk to him and we brought it with us when we moved but had nowhere here to put it). My little one really missed the woods so I had to get her out there. In doing this I found out that my older daughter had become scared to go into the woods(John had died walking home through the woods), after a lot of talking I was able to take her by the hand and get her to walk around my brother's pond. We saw deer tracks and scrapes and big Blue Heron and I think it really helped her. Now with John's cross there I should be able to get her back out there and show her the woods is a safe place to go. I feel so bad that I did not realize she had this fear sooner , but thank God I now know and should be able to help her get over her fear.

William,

I am so glad you are taking your meds and feeling a bit better. Yes, we did make it through one holiday and we will make it through the rest together.

Hugs & prayers,

Corinne

[Stallyn]

Suzanne, I was wondering where you were, ugh the first segment of the holidays is done, I am glad everyone is doing good, I myself have been in medicated daze, but it better than the mood swings. I miss the company here, Wendy, that scary you mentioned the star, Myrna bought one from Guatemala when she first arrived and I don't plan putting up a tree this year, lest something happens.

Love,

William

[WendyJ]

William,

Back when my Grandfather was a boy in school he made this beautiful clear plexiglass star in shop class that was attached to a string of white lights, one of the lights shone in the middle. He had made it for his mom, my Greatgrandmother. Well when he was older and married my grandmother she loved the star so much he duplicated one for her. Years later the 2 stars were given to their only daughters, my mother and my aunt. Many years ago when my mom got remarried and moved from an apartment to her house her star was either lost or stollen. One year for Christmas my husband borrowed my Aunts and duplicated it and made one also for us and my sister. They are beautiful and my husband was going to market them some day. I can't imaging my tree with out that star and the sad thing is he was going to make my daughter one this year but now the tradition will end where it is. I think Myrna would love if you would put her star on the tree. As much as I am dreading the whole Holiday and putting up the tree I think it would upset my husband to know his star didn't have it's rightful place right where it belongs. It will make me cry my eyes out though. William did I tell you I have a phone appt tomorrow night with Chritine Duminiak > She is an After Death Comunicator. I am very anxious to talk to her !

Love,

Wendy

[kayc]

Wendy,

I think people try to avoid whatever feels uncomfortable...but it's not like it ever goes away for us. My mom lost my dad over 25 years ago and I remember her telling me a long time ago how she appreciated that I would talk about him, she said no one else did, as if he didn't exist or she could somehow forget, but she never did, and not a day goes by but what she doesn't think of him.

[Stallyn]

Wendy,

I fear putting up the tree this year, since likely it won't be up for long, I plan to set it up in my new home next year and devote it to her memory, I also am thinking of making a memorial in the yard to make up for the desire to visit her. It may have the starfish shape of the treetop. Somehow if I did put up the tree, wouldn't my friends think I am crazy? or "over it"? I read your other post, how were you able to contact her?

Kay,

been find that too, people get tired of hearing it and I hate filling the papers with the marital status of 2 choices, married/single? why not widowed? The memories are always there. this may be crazy but if I had it a way to have my possessions with her name jointly I still would, the pages look blank without her name in it.