Jump to content
Grief Healing Discussion Groups

Recommended Posts

I've finally got round to scanning and uploading the Eulogy that I wrote for Cliff on my blog. Unfortunately one of the pages (page 10) won't work ...

so, if you'd like to read it ...

please click here (you need to click on each thumbnail to enlarge so that you can read them!):

http://boomayhew.blogspot.com/2009/09/cliffs-eulogy.html

and when you get to page 10, click here:

http://boomayhew.blogspot.com/2009/09/if-y...here-it-is.html

and then go back to the original link.

Hope that made sense!

I honestly believe that writing this, at the time, preserved my sanity. Today, it gives me comfort to know that I did my best for him.

Wishing you all peace and strength

xx

Link to comment
Share on other sites

You are so gifted, you really should write a book...you did a beautiful job!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Boo,

Thank you for sharing this. I feel like I know Cliff (and you) a little better. He sounds absolutely wonderful and how fortunate that you were able to have someone so special take you for his wife. I can see how you were a match made in heaven. Hold onto your mantra. (I thought that was pretty fantastic, too.)

Kath

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Korina, how are you? Don't think I've seen your name on the boards for a while. xxx

Boo:

I am hangin' in there. Kailyn and I just returned from Montreal, where we were visiting Scott's family for about 3 weeks. We stayed with his mom, and I had very limited internet access (when I went to my sister-in-law's for dinner) . This is so hard for her, as she lost her husband early, 18 years ago. Scott was such a total shock, as we lived on different ends of the country (big distance in Canada), and I had really kept Scott's addiction a secret from our families - fairly typical for a 'codependent', as I now understand. Not so much in the last while, but I had really only involved Scott's uncle, and he preferred not to tell the rest of the family as he didn't think they could really help. And while they probably couldn't have helped, it was a mistake to keep them in the dark, as much for their sakes as for Scott's. For anyone who is listening and may be in a similar situation, keeping secrets, while it may seem best at the time, it is not.

Scott's sister came back with us for a few days to help out with Kailyn (plus, no doubt because she finds it hard to let go of Kailyn - the last part of Scott living, and because we have become quite close, though the cirumstances suck). It is amazing how many people adore our little girl - going to have to make sure she doesn't get spoiled....but as our Bubbie says (another grandmother by choice, not blood - she has a quite a few relatives by choice!), you cannot spoil a child with love.

It has been over 3 months, now. Today was a really tough day. Maybe because we are back at home. But it all seemed so real, so very suddenly. Another kick in the guts. I had known intellectually while he was drinking that things could end badly, and while I had imagined scenarios, I don't think I ever really believed in my heart they could happen. This really was just a hurdle we needed to clear (who doesn't have hurdles?). I could have gone another 50 years without finding out what it means to feel this in my heart. And all the woulda shoulda couldas.

Anyhow, I could go on and on, but I would like to read over other entries I have missed. Thanks for asking.

Korina

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
×
×
  • Create New...