sunstreet Posted April 21, 2011 Report Share Posted April 21, 2011 I have been feeling some overwhelmed with how to catch up with you all and respond to each and every post since my need to be away and not an active participant while I did some very deep intensive work in my healing journey. I then decided to make one post and speak to you all rather than try to respond to each and every post. If anyone feels left out or forgotten please do let me know as is not my intent at all. To all the new, I am so sorry for your loss, and want to welcome you here. You have found a wonderful caring, supportive and safe place with which to bare your soul and be heard, be welcomed, be understood, and feel you truly belong and have a right to your grief and healing on your own terms in ways that you need. To let you all know that don't know my wife chose suicide on December 25, 2003 and was the most devistating loss of my life. It took me a very long time to reach the healed place I am at now in regards to my wife's choice. I understand your pain because I have been there and I want to offer you all encouragement that healing is possible but it does not come on it's own, it requires hard work and a fearless look at all the scary places are mind does not want to go to to process those things, move through those things and as we do the pain becomes less and less this all consuming monster that feels unsurvivable to a type of pain we can carry and feel joy again and engage in life again. I hold you all in gentle thought and prayer as you learn to weather your own storms. To the old, thank you for your patience as I took the time I needed to attain even greater healing. I want to thank you all for helping me to have the courage to see me and then truly find the courage to heal. I hold all of you in gentle thought and prayer as well as you continue on this healing journey that in my experience can also bring us joy. Today is my Birthday and I was planning to head to the island today for a day of fun but I awoke with a fever and a sore throat so will just spend the day here at home taking care; so will postpone my trip to the island for another day. Thinking, caring and supporting you all. Blessings and Courage, Carol Ann Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kayc Posted April 21, 2011 Report Share Posted April 21, 2011 Carol Ann, Happy Birthday! I'm sorry you are celebrating it by being sick. It's good to hear from you again and I hope you are well soon! Kay Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MartyT Posted April 21, 2011 Report Share Posted April 21, 2011 I'm so sorry to learn that you're not feeling well on what is supposed to be your special day, Carol Ann ~ but I agree with Kay: Take good care of yourself, get well, and save your birthday celebration for another day. Meanwhile, we all send sunshine and healing thoughts ~ and happy birthday wishes ~ to you today. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
melina Posted April 21, 2011 Report Share Posted April 21, 2011 Wishing you a happy birthday, Carol Ann! Enjoy your day as best you can, and take good care of yourself. Melina Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beakerj Posted April 21, 2011 Report Share Posted April 21, 2011 Happy Birthday lovely Carol Ann. Good to see your typeface around here again. You're an inspiration, that's for sure. It's great to hear you've made another step forward. Wishing you all your favourite things for your birthday, & sticking my tongue out at your sore throat. Becka XXX Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MartyT Posted April 21, 2011 Report Share Posted April 21, 2011 Oh Becka! "Typeface" ~ What a perfect way to refer to our invisible, only-in-writing (but still very present) selves on this site! I've not heard this expression before, but I love it! ♥ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lainey Posted April 22, 2011 Report Share Posted April 22, 2011 Happy Birthday Carol Ann, hope your sore throat isn't spoiling your day too much. It's good to have you back. Lainey Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LostmyHoney Posted April 22, 2011 Report Share Posted April 22, 2011 Happy Birthday Carol Ann ! Wishing you quick healing. Rachel Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
STARKISS Posted April 22, 2011 Report Share Posted April 22, 2011 Happy Birthday Carol Ann, I am so sorry that you are sick but I hope your day is going as well as it can.. I hope you celebrate your birthday when you can make that trip to the island... You are a true friend to me and I appreciate all that you have done... So here are some healing hugs and special wishes on your special day... Your friend Shelley Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Nicholas Posted April 22, 2011 Report Share Posted April 22, 2011 Happy Birthday, Carol Ann and a big thank you for all the advice you have given, especially to me personally. Nicholas Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sunstreet Posted April 22, 2011 Author Report Share Posted April 22, 2011 Thank you Kay, and it is good to be back, and I woke today with no fever and the sore throat is barely there now; so choosing self-care is always the way to go! Thank you Marty, that is exactly what I did---took care. I did go out and by myself some flowers and had fun arranging them. I am already planning to go to the island this coming Tuesday. Thank you Melina, hoping it is getting a little easier for you as time passes.. Thank you Becka, I agree what a wonderful way to put it "typeface" I love it too. Thank you Lainey, no didn't spoil my day at all, just mean't had to change my plans. Yes, it is good to be back. I've missed everyone. Thank you Rachel, I am already almost better! Thank you Shelley, you are dear friend to me too. I see your healing all over the place and it warms my heart and I am so PROUD of you. Thank you Nicholas, you are so very welcome and thank you for all you've given me. I had a great day yesterday and was suprised with some gifts by a far away friend. I did not get a very good sleep last night though so plan to head for a nap as soon as I post this. I celebrated yesterday and I felt so much joy it was palpable. Thank you everyone. Blessings and Courage, Carol Ann Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
STARKISS Posted April 22, 2011 Report Share Posted April 22, 2011 Thanks Carol Ann, Thanks for the nice words and by the way you made me cry today.. It was a happy cry but I am so honoured to have such a great friend and one who really understands me... Shelley Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Queeniemary Posted April 24, 2011 Report Share Posted April 24, 2011 Happy Belated Birthday Carol Ann. I have been somewhat away from the computer for a few days, and missed your birthday. My friend Dana (whose husband died 4-19-09) lost her mother in law on 4-18-11, and several of us have spent a few days in Eastern Arkansas giving support and picking up children at airports nearby. This has been very hard time for Dana, bring up, of course, so many memories of Morris. Hope you are feeling much better. Love you friend Mary (Queeniemary) in Arkansas Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nats Posted April 24, 2011 Report Share Posted April 24, 2011 Carol Ann, Not sure how I missed your first post back but catching up today, and I wish you the best, it is indeed good to see posting again, so glad you to hear you have found some answers, but not glad you have a bug take care of yourself, keep the posts comming... NATS Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sunstreet Posted May 23, 2011 Author Report Share Posted May 23, 2011 Dear Shelley, I am relieved that if I made you cry that it was a "good" cry. I am equally as honored Shelley to have you as a friend...remember all feelings eventually dissipate just as the waves upon the shore. You can do it Shelley...I once was not aware of my own strengths too...you have many strengths Shelley....I know because you have survived....I encourge you to keep on your path of healing and bit by bit you'll discover it is safe to come out from within yourself now and discover all the opportunities that await you... Blessings and Courage, Carol Ann ****************************************** Dear Mary, Thank you so much and so sorry that I have needed to be away so long and I thank you and all of you for your understanding. Hoping all is well with you Mary. ****************************************** Blessings and Courage, Carol Ann Dear Nats, Thank you so very much! I have needed to be away to do some personal work, health reasons, and complete a civil suit; that would not have been appropriate to share here in any of these forums. The civil suit should be coming to an end on May 29 and I should be more available on these forums. Blessings and Courage, Carol Ann Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
melina Posted May 23, 2011 Report Share Posted May 23, 2011 Good to hear from you again, Carol Ann - and happy birthday! Melina Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mfh Posted May 23, 2011 Report Share Posted May 23, 2011 Hi Carol Ann I am not sure how I missed your post either but I do wish you a belated happy birthday and get well message. Congratulations on doing the work, walking the path, going deeper....you are an example to all of us here. Peace, Mary (mfh) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kayc Posted May 23, 2011 Report Share Posted May 23, 2011 Carol Ann, It's good to see you back here again! We have missed you... Kay Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sunstreet Posted May 23, 2011 Author Report Share Posted May 23, 2011 Dear Melina, Thank you so much! I really enjoyed my Birthday; I went to a place where Melissa and I spent a lot of time. It involved a ferry ride and I had forgotten how glorious it is to be out there on the ocean. I felt Melissa with me and it was just grand. Blessings and Courage, Carol Ann ******************************* Dear Mary (mfh), Thank you so very much! Yes, walking the path...going deeper...healing more...that's me. Blessings and Courage, Carol Ann ******************************* Dear Kay, Thank you so very much again! Blessings and Courage, Carol Ann ******************************* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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