Lonely and Confused

[Gwenivere]

You are so right, Kay.  That normal was so great now that we know what it feels like when it is gone.  I'd give anything to have one of those normal, if sometimes mundane days again.  Even if it means cleaning up after him which was never ending.  

[mittam99]

Gwen and Kay you're both so right, what we wouldn't give for one of those mundane "normal' days of old. The days when just watching TV or eating a meal was special simply because we were together. The problem is we now have a new reality, a "new normal" if you will. In my world, I'm learning to adapt to being alone. The trick for me is that I do talk with Tammy, sometimes verbally and sometimes in my mind. Sure I have many moments I cry when I think about all that Tammy went through and how unfair so many things were, but, I have to try to focus a good portion of my attention to the present. If I focus too much on the past, I have a hard time functioning. I have to sort of "compartmentalize" my grief thoughts so I'm not feeling constantly overwhelmed. Does that make sense?

[brat#2]

Kay, Gwen and Mitch - yes I would absolutely adore to have one of those mundane days again, just being together.  I haven't had any dreams of Dale yet either, at least not that I can remember.  I'm not sure I would want to, because when I wake up, the harsh reality that he is not here I think would be too hard to handle. It's hard enough waking up every morning realizing he's not here, but to have spent time with him in a dream and then to not have him would be so very hard, maybe my mind knows that and that's why I haven't dreamed of him.  I talk to him daily, like has been said, sometimes out loud and sometimes in my mind and sometimes I feel he hears me and gives me a sign that he has.  I think, Mitch, that I compartmentalize my grief thoughts too, like you said it keeps me from becoming to overwhelmed, so it makes sense to me.

Joyce

 

[Gin]

Add me to the list of everyone who yearns for a good old mundane day.  Just being together.

[Widowedbysuicide]

I would like to be on the list too.

For me I'm finding that thinking too much in the past or more than a few days in the future is overwhelming.  I'm really trying to live in the moments and in the day when it comes to the tuff stuff.

Marita