Marie Lee

Hi Cookie - Allergies are no joke! Be careful! Anxiety and depression are battles for me as well. Hang in there ! Kev's birthday was yesterday and the 12 th is the date I lost him. Been an emotional roller coaster. Aggravated by AC problems and a stinky fridge that I had to clean ... rotten meat. My crazy life sometimes! Still trying to be social .. still doing ballroom dancing... planning a trip to see daughter and grand daughter soon. I miss Kev... I thought he might have chuckled at me with the stinky fridge situation and tease me saying .. I know you miss me now...all I could think of is his silliness while taking care of it and the song " Love Stinks" played in my mind over and over - lol- searching for the humor in my fields of tears these days. Hugs!

Beautiful babies Butch :-)

Thank you so very much!

Hi Polly! I am happy to hear you have Bill :-)... I am sorry your daughter is not happy for you.. she is young.. maybe in time...she'll get it. The limo wedding at Vegas sounds like it was fun! Hugs for the upcoming anniversary...Aug 16 was my Kev's birthday and then this September would have been our 30th. All we can do is all we can do - sending love your way .. Marie

Good one Tom pb.. you hit it right on ... definitely feeling it.. Kay... Makes sense...a couple of months ago during a drought season we had here.. we had a fire started due to someone burning books... how crazy is that person to burn books in the heat and when banned due to drought? SMH...

Hi all.. Yes- the walk of the wounded... Yes -my heart is screaming in pain Yes -I have aged ... I am now seasoned with grief... Ohsosad, Vicky , Cookie.. you are among friends. Only those that grieve can understand the journey.. Gwen, a special hug to you..,You are a beautiful person- Steve loved you.. we love you.. Cyber hug.. Kay- loved that poem - that was me in the summer as a child for sure... perhaps it's me now looking back at the summer of my life... My son and grandson spent the evening with me recently... oh how that made my heart happy for a little while... Everyone: Thinking of you all and sending thoughts of love, peace and a measure of happiness.. your way.. even if it's just a beautiful memory that brings happiness... I pray it comforts you with the hug of friendship and with the gifts of love ... ...Marie

Yes - Mary Beth.. Your poetic words put it so beautifully... Yes- Part of me died too... Thanks for sharing. Hugs/ Marie

Hi Kay..Yea dancing is fun... Glad you're healing... Never heard of not being able to mow due to regs.. I guess Florida is always hot ... so maybe that's why.. I hope you get rain .. maybe we should all do a rain dance ;-) Take care!

Thanks Kay, How are feeling? I hope the healing from your fall is progressing and maybe you're getting around a little better. I am still trying to carve out some form of an existence alone these days. Kind of feel like a boat adrift on the open sea unmanned and not anchored .... Still doing ballroom dancing .. it's therapeutic...and going to a few local meetups. Joined a group at a trivia the other evening. It was fun. There are still days I sleep too much. Nights I lie awake.. and of course Kev fills my heart and mind always... I keep thinking how unfair this all is. Me without him.. The kids and grandkids miss him ... such a huge void in all of our lives... I am making small headway.. ordered air conditioner filters .. I finally noticed the size listed on the outside of the unit. Kev used to make them out of a frame he rigged to save $...I thought I was going to have to figure out how to do that but then I found the size and ordered them online. Small victories... Figured out the ink cartridges on our printer ... Will have to get a new riding lawn mower soon .. the one we have is old and Kev fixed all the little nuances so it would last. I don't mind mowing but I can't fix this old thing... my brother in law is mowing currently .. I pay him to mow. After the summer heat..I will address the issue and start back mowing.There is a bit of therapy to yard work for me. It's about time to get back into that groove.. It's the one hundred million little things isn't it?? Missing Kev every single day in every single way and I always will. Sending out hugs my friends...

Gwen - So true .. " when we were happy and content, there just seems to be no time "... So true ... I miss that life .... Powerful poem Marty - thank you Dr L ... I am positive Jo loved the pink :-). Its the smallest of details sand kindnesses that matter isn't it? Hugs...

I can't imagine being that far away from loved ones during this tragic loss you've experienced.. Again, words fail me... pls take care... Prayers for Peace...

Maryann - Hang in there ! So glad you felt your love watching over you. Hugs to you!

Joyce - A beautiful tribute- I can just feel your love and I know he does too. Hugs/ Marie

Hi Cookie .. Sending out much love! Marie

Dear Peanut Britt- It is hard to find the right words but I am inclined to at least tell you how very sorry I am to hear your tragic tale... of not only one loss but two... as a side thought , it also means two loves... maybe that bring some measure of comfort ? I have no idea what to say to help you cope... can't imagine the agony you must be going through...losing a spouse is devastating... I hope you are surrounded by a loving supportive group of frds/fam/ counseling to help you at this time of great sorrow. We are here for you. Much love to you- hugs/Marie

Love the people here and I hope it's ok to come back once in awhile to check in on everyone ... we all have shared so much and understand the struggle to find a way to navigate life after the loss of our partner.. And yes, Dr Lenera we are all a mess... I think that may be my new normal.. hugs, Marie

When I see commercials that depict accidents I turn the channel.. I saw one where a man hit the steering wheel after struck - all I could think of is Kev. Hugs

Good for you night winds. And you know what? I don't ever want to get over Kev's love for me. I will live and love as long as God allows but I will never get over my love for Kev.

Hugs Cookie - I think it was your post about the shared house.. not a bad idea at all.. everyone needs people in their lives ..

Hi everyone-Been out of the loop and did some reading trying to catch up mon how everyone is doing .. You all say so many things that are impactful and downright genius and I wrote them Down to remember.., mostly it's one of Marge's .. The " eff" story Marty posted hit the nail on the head.. Gwen: You're such a loving soul surely Steve is so close to you - holding you - maybe so close he's literally a part of you.. holding you up... Tried to quote this part of Gwens post but it didn't work right - Gwen said: I miss him making fun of me. To me and telling his friends some crazy thing I did. But all with love in his heart. More to the point, he noticed me. There are so many little things I don't bother with any more because no one notices like he did. I try but to no avail... Isn't that the heart of it all? He noticed me... Sending much love- Marie Lee

The heat is awful here in Florida.. Doing my best to keep on rolling ... Someone on another website mentioned visualizing our future and that's where we end up.. hmmm..thinking on that one.. Everyone:Pls remember you are not alone , we are here and you are loved ! Take care Peeps!

Hi Kevin, Yes , I enjoy it so far. Hope you are doing well.

Hi Kay- Oh my! I wish you speedy recovery! I do relate to the permanent nerve damage :-/ Our health system is so often insufficient... I pray that you will find answers to your burdens. Thanks for the well wishes for the frogs lol :-)... Hugs!

Hi all.. It's been awhile since I have been on here.. still have waves of grief that knock me down. I just keep getting back up. lol Somedays I feel glutton for punishment.. lol... I think of you all often.. I hope you are all doing well, or at least the best you can today. I miss Kev every single day. I went to the wedding in Co.. it was beautiful. It was his side of the family.. they were so very kind and gracious to me. The ceremony had a part about "these are the hands of your friend".. it got to me ...lovely ...lovely wedding. I was proud to be a part of it. Got to see my little love bug.. my little Evelyn.. my grand daughter.. she just turned one in May. My brother in laws family has a little girl too. She turned one in Jan.. they were so cute together. Had a gorgeous view of the foothills to the Rockies at the house I rented. That was very therapeutic. I spent most of my time on the deck enjoying the view. I had a crappy date recently.. I guess it's gonna happen as I try to navigate whatever life I have. I have started a ballroom dancing class.. and have done some yoga.. so I am trying to stay somewhat active. I am also doing some projects around the house. I miss Kev's wise guidance and his protection..his love and well.. just everything.. Well.. enough chatter.. let me know how ya'll are.. peace & hugs , Marie.

Happy ( happy?!) Fourth... I appreciate the info about Roku and the streaming capabilities... been thinking on that myself. Another thing Kev would have attended to. You're so right Gwen.. it never ends.... I was looking for a card for a present and it was in a pile of boxes where some pics of us were... So, my heart was heavy for most of the day after that... It truly never ends... I go out to eat a lot as I cannot get enthused about cooking .. I miss Kev's grilling... Yes, never ending indeed... Happy Fourth? Hugs, Marie