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So Unreal


Guest moparlicious

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Guest moparlicious

Another tragedy has happened in my life and I wonder how could this be true. As you all know, my beloved Dan died of cancer on Aug. 20,2007 and I miss him more than life itself!!!!!! 3 days ago I was at work and received a phone call from one of my best friend's sister, telling me I had to get to the hospital in Chandler by 6 pm to say good-bye. My friend Kristen was on life support, and the family made the choice to remove her off of life support. I went there and said my good byes,a pending autopsy is awaiting.Today is the memorial and I wonder how I am going to do this. My life feels so unmanageable and I feel like I am spiraling downward. I am falling into a deep depression and want to give up on life.I cry all the time and feel stuck at this point, I have so much to do today and I need all of you!!!!!!!!!!!!! We just saw each other before Christmas and she too was 41 years old, like my beloved Dan.This has caused me great despair, and heartache.She was very close to me and my husband.They believe it was a accidental overdose. I just don't know what to do, I feel like running and never stopping!!!!!!!!!!! Where would I go? Why? Why? Why? I miss them so much !!!!!!!

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Kim I am so so sorry for what you are going through and I have been there before and am there again. In Sept of 2001 in 2 weeks time I lost my boss to pancreatic cancer, my father in law to prostate cancer and my cousin John who worked in the World Trade Center for Cantor Fitzgerald who died in the 9-11 attacks. October of 2006 I got the news that a friend whom I had known since kindergarten had died of a heart attack then 5 months later I lost my darling husband to a blood clot to the heart and now I am going thru my Mom with Lung Cancer. I understand your pain, I know it is hard and you will get through it somehow. We are all here for you whenever you need us, please remember that. Again I am so very sorry. Please take care of yourself and keep in touch.

Love,

Wendy

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Kim,

I am so sorry to hear that you are going through another loss. I don't understand or even try to understand why we have to go through multiple losses but please know that I am keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.

Hugs & prayers, :wub:

Corinne

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Guest moparlicious

Thank you to everyone who helped me get through yesterday, it was so hard. I was asked to speak and it was so hard I could not do it, I wrote something and had someone read it for me!!!! Everyone on here are very special to me and all of you are wonderful,caring,and compassionate people!!!!!!! I am having a very hard day and know life must go on,but why? I have children,who are older, but never the less, they think they need me. My heart is so broken and my soul is torn, I am trying to make it through another day,one hour at a time.Thank you again.God Bless. With Love, Kim

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Kim...I'm so sorry for your losses.It will one year next Sunday Jan20th that I lost my beloved husband. Just know that we are all here for each other..some like you are just starting this jounrey and there are other who have been on this jounrey for quit sometime..but if I have learned anything is this is one of the best places to come to...here people listen they let us feel want we need to feel and they help us through it and for that I thank GOD that I found this site. So just know that we are here for you and we will help the best we know how. Take care of yourself and come back anytime to talk. Gail :wub:

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Kim, I am so very sorry about the loss of your husband and your best friend. My heart goes out to you...I can't even imagine. It is unreal how these losses were so close together.

I agree with Lori and Annie...your kids really do need you no matter how old you get or how old they are. My mom would often talk about her mom with tears in her (my moms) eyes...and my mom was in her mid 80's when she died and talked about her mom all the time. I at almost 50 need her still and wish she were here.

Take care of yourself and know that one day, you will have some peace.

Lori

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Guest moparlicious

Thank you to all who responded and for all your support. I know my children need me, but some days seem so hopeless. I drag myself out of bed and force myself to continue on, I do not know why sometimes. I am trying to look at all the positive,this is such a nightmare!!! I appreciate all of you and so grateful I found this site!!!! I would not be where I am today if it weren't for all of you generous, loving,caring people. THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Kim

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Kim

I do not know why life goes like it does, why some are called home in half the time of others, why life has such inbalance and injustice, I only know we are left behind to deal with it the best we know how and sometimes this is a huge challenge. Please know that everyone here on this site is thinking of you and saying prayers for you each in their own way, and we are so sorry for what you are feeling and going through. It must be terribly hard to lose your husband and then your friend, especially so young when you least expect it. We are here to support you in your grief. I could tell you it will get better, and I believe it will, but at this point in time I am afraid that would just sound like hollow platitudes. Just please hang in there until it does, you have people who care about you.

Love,

Kay

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I don't know what to say, Kim. You didn't need this, especially right now.

I will say that if your children "think" they need you then you have a leg up on some of us. That gives you an opening to go to them and tell them that right now, you need them. Give them a chance to give to you for a change.

Best,

--Bob

Thank you to everyone who helped me get through yesterday, it was so hard. I was asked to speak and it was so hard I could not do it, I wrote something and had someone read it for me!!!! Everyone on here are very special to me and all of you are wonderful,caring,and compassionate people!!!!!!! I am having a very hard day and know life must go on,but why? I have children,who are older, but never the less, they think they need me. My heart is so broken and my soul is torn, I am trying to make it through another day,one hour at a time.Thank you again.God Bless. With Love, Kim

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Guest moparlicious

Wow!!!! Thank you so much!!!! Everyone on here makes me feel so great, you all are amazing. Just when I was feeling so down and was wondering if my life could get any worse, you all on this site, put a post on here and care about me!!!! This means the world to me and thank you is not enough. Together we journey, mending our broken hearts together!!! Love, Kim :wub::D

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KIM - I started to write a little while ago and then must have hit the wrong key - so I don't know what happened....but what I started to say was simply

that my heart cries for your sadness and wondered if just having someone

hold you close while you cried and cried and cried with such a broken heart if

that would help you...maybe a close family member or are professional counselors allowed to do that. I know that sometimes just a comforting (but

sincere) touch or arm around my shoulders helps - only temporary, but stil

it comforts. I wish I could help you more but I feel like running too, but

where to? All my paths are blocked. My heart goes out to you, Kim. Lily

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Lily, dear ~

I think you will come to find that, even though we cannot touch each other or give each other hugs in the physical sense on this special site, we do know how to give "virtual" hugs, and we certainly do know how to hold one another in our hearts ~ just as we are able to hold our departed loved ones close in our hearts. So go ahead and send Kim some virtual hugs, and know that we are sending them to you, too. :wub:

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Guest moparlicious

Lily and Marty,

Thank you, I am having a really bad day and reading your posts has helped me once again.Thank you for the virtual hugs, I feel like I have been given those all the time and they sure are nice. Glad you got on here and welcome aboard new friend, I am so sorry we have to meet under these circumstances, but hey all of our loved ones are together in their home, as we are here in ours(earth). Please do not apologize for anything Lily,it really is not needed. I appreciate all you have to offer your warm and caring heart!!!!! We all have that gift. I feel your pain as well as many on here, I'm sorry for that!!!!!!!! Thanks again and I will continue to read and post as often as I can. Love, Kim :D

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