MZM Posted October 19, 2010 Report Share Posted October 19, 2010 I really dont mean to be rude and I hope someone will help me... See, the thing is, is that my psychologist says "no matter what the situation in our loss of a spouse/partner/significant other - married for one year, engaged, married for 40 years, with kids....we are all facing a huge loss and to each one of us, no matter the situation, its the biggest and worst thing in the world.." i see the pain that we're all going through, and whilst i cant imagine what it must be like to have kids and have had this whole life with a person and then you have to live without them, in my dealing with my situation i cant help but ask "why does this have to happen to me at 28 years old!!!" As i said, I really dont mean to be rude. I see young couples so happy and i almost want to puke:( I have become so negative compared to the happy, naive, carefree person that I was... I loved my life, always saying that I want to freeze time - what was wrong with me, why was i so naive! How do I ever trust that if i meet someone again oneday that he too wont die on me:( harsh but true:( At the age of 28, i am grieving the future that could have been. We planned to have 4 kids! Im sobbing right now!!! Can barely even see my keyboard. We planned to continue to travel the world. We were soulmates with the rest of our lives planned together....and now i have to go through his birthday, all the holidays and then mine, single and alone....with all this pain and what ifs (like we all face) Please moms give me guidance. My mom has been my best friend, but I cant keep crying to her because I feel bad in that im taking her for granted -when she can go too:( I feel like its all about me and im neglecting them...Im so tired of life already and its all about death. I cant lose another person! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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