Looking For The Positives

[kayc]

QMary, I am praying for you today. I hope you have some unexpected good from your visit.

I have to go back to the Nike Lab at the U of O today for stability testing on the trial Diabetic shoes with my Orthotic friend.

I have a HUGE POSITIVE to share but decided to post it here instead:

[Queeniemary]

Very tiring day, long trip to and from Melbourne, (4 hours total) then rehearsal for college play at 6:30. My sis was as I expected. She knew me, said a few, very few words, mostly kept her eyes closed. I cut her hair for her, at the request of my niece, she did not seem to even know it was happening. As I was leaving she said she enjoyed the visit, I had to lean close to her mouth to hear the words. She is must less responsive than when I saw her last. So hard, but I do think she was glad to see me.

Thank you for your prayers and thoughts.

QMary

[kayc]

It had to feel good to hear her say she enjoyed your visit. My mom was appreciative of my visits, but toward the end she couldn't say anything, she was too far gone and out of it. That was hard. I am glad your sister knew you were there. Even though she is unresponsive, it doesn't necessarily mean she isn't aware, I learned that from when my sister was in her coma for 4 1/2 months. She could hear everything, just couldn't respond. Sometimes the doctors just don't know how much is going on inside of them.

I'm sorry you had to go out last night, I'm sure you just wanted to collapse and stay home. It had to be an exhausting day and I hope today you can rest up from it.

[Queeniemary]

Just wanted to post a few positive things, we have not used this thread much lately. One: My sister is being cared for at home right now (Medicaid not approved yet), and seems to be very content. Her blood pressure when at the nursing home was very high, now it is normal. This is much harder on the family, but they do have some hired help, and are managing. I have not been over since she was moved home, but my brother was there last week, and said she seemed more engaged, and aware of what was going on. Her physical condition has not changed and there is little hope that it will. I am going to try to get over to Melbourne next week.

I have been working really hard (well maybe not that hard, but steady) on doing the "Full plate diet"Basically it is a high fiber diet (my doctor says I must eat more fiber), and since late January, I have lost 11 pounds. Not a lot, but I am eating a lot (especially sweet potatoes and beans) and slowly the weight is coming off. If anyone interested in high fiber eating look up Full Plate Diet on the internet. Costs nothing, it is a non profit.

We have cast the play "Doublewide Texas", and have had a read through. Some of you may remember this is the World Premiere that we will be doing in June, and the playwrights will be attending the opening night. We are planning a reception before, and a cast party afterwards, so our people here can meet and visit with the playwrights, Jessie Jones, Nicholas Hope, and Jamie Wooten. I am super excited. Plans are moving right along for their visit.

I am very busy right now, with the college play in which I have a small part, and in working on the play I am directing. We start our rehearsals as soon as the college play is over the first week of May. Being busy is good for me! Hope all had a good Easter

QMary

[kayc]

I don't each much sweet potatoes and potatoes because of the carbs (Diabetic) but I do eat high fiber, lots of vegetables, low meat, low carb, low fat. If you put all of my conditions together, it's hard to figure out what to eat! For instance, with Gout I'm not supposed to have red meat and beans, but I'm allergic to fish, and I can't just eat chicken all the time, so I try varying beans, chicken, protein powder, and small quantities nuts/peanut butter to get my protein in. Challenging!

I'm glad your play is coming along, I know how enjoyable that is for you and now that you have some of the "challenging people" out of the picture, I'm sure it's a lot more fun!

I haven't had a lot of positives to post lately. The couple from church invited me over Sunday, so that was positive. I'm afraid it's been a barrage of bad things happening lately, identity theft, truck broke down, need new heating system, the volunteer job as Treasurer has been a pill and the computer has had glitches that caused a lot of problems, so I try to buck it up and keep going.

Good for you, losing weight! My weight loss is slow but still working at it.

[MartyT]

Oh Kay, you are such a trouper ~ I don' think we say often enough how much we all admire your spunk, your grit, your determination and your courage. You are an incredible inspiration for all of us, and I want you to know that everyone here thinks you are simply wonderful.

[kayc]

Ahh shucks!

[Wifflesnook]

Totally agree Marty. Positive for me is our daughter and her two littlies came for Easter and at five and almost three they are a joy to me (and full on hard work). The holiday went well and they have just left leaving a huge gap, but for sure I couldn't cope with them all the time and shall be glad of a rest and chance to do what I want rather than what they do.

[feralfae]

Greetings Tribe, and thank you for all the wonderful positives. This is a wonderful fire, Marty, and thank you.

I have given myself the day off, and have also given myself a pedicure, facial, and my hair is straightened. I have been out for a walk in the forest. and then spent time praying in the MW while the ravens circled overhead, calling, and two chilly warblers serenaded me with their pretty song. And this came to me, which I wrote in my journal, and will share here. I am not sure if these are my words or Doug's, but it was nice to have them come into my heart while I was out praying. . .

"And in the end, I think that the only thing that matters is that you have loved and been loved in such a way—to such superlatives—that everything else in life becomes merely incidental. All else falls away in the face of the joy and beauty of such love."

I am sure we each have our own words for expressing this.

It is a cold and sunny day here, windy as all get-out. Most of the CDs the guys hung have tangled and been blown on to the roof, but the screening seems to be working at keeping the feathered ones away. (There is a definite tree shortage after all the beetle kill.) I imagine the helicopters and small planes flying over are seeing dots of reflective CDs on the roof. I hope they made a lovely pattern.

Lots of energy moving through me today, and lots of epiphanies and insights. I am indulging in steamed asparagus, wild rice, and some soft cheese with some GF bread. There is a fire burning on the lower level, and I am enjoying my mystery novel. And all of it is very Positive. + + + + + + + + + + + + + +

*<twinkles>*

namaste

fae

[kayc]

It sounds like you're having a wonderful day, fae! I've been trying to catch up here, while I made a big pot of soup, and in between taking care of the animals. I let the fire go out as it's 50 but will have to build another one later this afternoon. You go through a lot more kindling this time of year! Arlie let me vacuum the house...not his favorite thing.

[Wifflesnook]

Thank you Fae. I think what you (or Doug) wrote was probably the most imprtant thing of all. We have loved, and been loved and nothing can take that away.it keeps me going against all the setbacks. And I think you believe, like me, that somehow we are still loved by them and we still love them and always will.

[feralfae]

Yes Jan, you are right.

I definitely believe that Love is the most powerful and enduring (eternal) force in the Universe. Doug called me his "forever adventure partner" and he knew what "forever" meant. He was a an epistemologist and used words carefully.

I do not think the cord/harmonic/energetic song that exists between to spirits who unite can be broken, because we really do become one. There is no place to separate what has become one entity—a singularity, if you will.

And, in some way I have yet to define, having that love flowing does truly make everything else all right, even if I forget that things are all right sometimes in my grief.

namaste

fae

[kayc]

I couldn't agree more and have said it before...what we had, we STILL have, we are just limited in our capacity to communicate with them. We continue to live in faith in our love and our relationship, knowing that the day we are joined together again all will be as it was.

[enna]

My positive today is threefold:

A close friend has had a pig valve implant and because of his age they told him they will NOT do another pig valve replacement. Last week he had a scare and after tests found that his carotid artery had NO blockage and he will Not need surgery for that. He was informed by his insurance company after the evaluation group told his doctor that his surgery (if needed) was not approved!

Those of us who are at the end of our decades are now being told that if we are a certain age we will not be able to have surgeries that may save our lives! So why do the states not all pass a law where we can decide when we want to die!

My second positive is the news another friend received after his fifth procedure for esophageal cancer. Everything was clear and all they need to do now is watch him for the next year. This is truly wonderful since he has been a good friend over the last three decades. He was good friends with Jim and I taught with his wife for three decades before she died of cancer.

My third positive is about me. I have been pain-free from back pain now for a few weeks ~ physical therapy did help. Clearing up a bladder infection with Cipro that I didn’t even know I had. And the four MRIs I suffered through are looking good even though they are still looking for the primary cause of my problem.

My brain is in good shape. I don’t know about the doctor who read that MRI!

L/Hip and knee are arthritic, but I’m not ready for any cortisone injections. I’ll hit the health club first.

My spine did not look too good according to my neurologist so he wants me to go back to my spine surgeon for further evaluation of the two MRIs he ordered (who by the way) does not believe in spine surgery ~ yay! Treatment will depend on whether or not a nerve in the spinal cord is causing the problem I’m having with my “angry bladder.”

I meet with my urologist in the next week and he will talk to be about tests he ordered or performed.

Did I mention that chocolate cures most of my physical problems or are they mental problems?!

I wonder if I’m seeing all these specialists because of the excellent insurance I’m paying for!! I wonder.

[MartyT]

♥

[feralfae]

Dear Anne,

All such good news! Hurray!

I am especially pleased to hear about your friend who does not need the heart valve replacement. That is truly good news.

I think we all recognize that a part of universal health care is rationing of health care according to age, condition, and other factors. Some people are opting for private medical help in other countries, and an entire industry has developed around helping people get from rationed health care countries to places where care is available. Canada and England both have excellent alternative options through "medical tourism" to other countries, and I imagine that will begin here in the USA as well. I know several US citizens who have gone to Asian countries recently for surgery and are very pleased with the results. We do find options. Another option is going to private, self-pay care and hospitals. Of course, here in the US, I realize that having end of life options to terminate is becoming another alternative in some states. I suppose it depends on one's desires — and means!

But Anne, I think what you are doing is best: becoming your own medical advocate (or, for some people, finding someone else to be their advocate) and making your own determinations on what you want to do. I think the days are past when we can reasonably look to MDs as being the final word on medical conditions: they are often highly specialized, and if not, they are obligated to abide by certain government guidelines under the system. I think it is going to take quite a while to iron out the kinks and wrinkles in the system.

Your own news sounds a bit better, and that there is reason to hope things can be further resolved.

Cheering you on!

*<winkles>*

fae

[kayc]

My hairdresser is on Medicaid and just got surgery to redo her eyelids, which were drooping. My eyelids droop as much as hers did, yet no way would my insurance cover it, they would say it was cosmetic. How come Medicaid will pay for something as frivolous as that but our insurance doesn't want to cover surgeries necessary to sustain our LIVES?! Things are really messed up with our health care system in the US.

Anne, I'm elated with your newest reports, as I'm sure you are! This calls for a shot of chocolate!

[Queeniemary]

Hurray Anne for the positive news!! I am so glad. So happy to hear that your back is pain free!! YAY!

Kay, my sister Betty had her eyelids, which were drooping done. The drooping was interfering with her vision, especially her peripheral vision. I would think most insurances would cover when it was causing vision problems. It isn't frivolous when it concerns your vision. You might check with them.

QMary

[kayc]

Her eyelids weren't obscuring her vision, but her doctor wrote it that way. It has to be pretty bad to do that.

[kayc]

Huge positive:

Night before last my BIL narrowly escaped getting t-boned in an accident. Tonight my daughter was driving me back from the shower and had an extremely close call...by 2-3 inches. I'm glad we aren't in the hospital tonight!

[mittam99]

Glad you're ok Kay!

[feralfae]

Dear Kay, I am glad you are home and safe.

Have a good sleep and awake refreshed.

fae

[MartyT]

♥

[LadyCarrie]

Dear Kay,

What a close call you had! Two to three inches is really a close call. I tried to tell you at about 11:30 last night that I'm so glad you are safe, but soon realized I was writing gibberish in my sleep. I'm not a night owl at all. it just appears that way sometimes.

Carrie

[Queeniemary]

Glad you were not in an accident Kay. I worry anytime I have to get out on the highways. My positive is that I visited my sister Lois yesterday. She was the best I have seen her in months. Her voice was strong, she was very alert, and aware I was there. She started talking to me when I was only halfway across the room from her bed. I do believe that being at home is much better for her, just wish it was not so much harder on the family. They do have some hired help, and they also have their routine down pretty well. I suspect this is where she will stay. My sis Betty is wanting to come from AZ to visit with her for a bit. I think we are going to arrange to fly her back here at the end of our California trip this summer. I think a road trip, crammed in the back of a car with two other women would be too hard on her. We all agree. I am so grateful to have seen Lois in this much better condition, and pray it continues!