teny

I just want to add my thoughts for you today from far away.It is a dificult day.TENY

Hellow my friends .It has been very silent lately so I wonder is every one OK ?I miss you especialy those of you that have started togethet the terible nightmare.Bob Wendy Fred Gail Karenb Deborah Derek Corrine Kay Lily ....Im sorry if I forget names.For me it is 28 months and yesterday was the first night I slept without using a pill.There are some days that I feel less pain but heis always with me.My thoughts are every day with my loss.I have a fear for the coming easter hillidays especialy the week before.The week before our church celebrates this week with alot grief for death and the ceremonies are very painfull.I hope that at the end of April my grandaughter is goin to be born.April is a significant month .I met Yiany the 9 my birthday is the11 Yianys the 22 my fathers 29 .Love from far away .TENY

Dear friend .I was away for the weekend and Ifound yor post and all the replays now.Im 28 months and have no answer to move on to what .I try every day to find meening for what is left of my future hoping that the pain is going to be less.Sweet memories have not yet replace daily tearsfor me.Some days are so hard that I wonder why Im alive.I try to think that is my duty to be here.My birthday is also 11 of april .I wonder like others that are here longer about friends that that are not posting how are they coping ?Bob had always a wise advise Karen was agret suport Gail was here when I came. Fred a very caring friend .I want to know as Rosmary is asking what did realy help to move on?Love from far away TENY

Today in greece is the day that uor churth prays for the lost souls.Everyone that has lost a loved one goes to the cemetary to pray.I did not go I dont have yet the courage to go but I went to an isolated church that I was alone to light a candle.I cried so hard for so long asking Gods help and asking Yiany to give me a sign that he can hear me telling him how much I love and miss him. I pray for all of you today .Maybe some day joy will come.TENY

Dear Wendy Im thinking of you and sending my love from far away.How are you?TENY

Dear friends I want to say how sorry I am to welcome new people to this site.I know the hurt.For me it has been 28 moths monday and it never stops hurting.I have started going to the seminars <death and lonliness>it was not what Iexpected to be .It is mostly about the existencial fear and lonly feeling when someone is terminal ill and knows he is going to die.I need to heal and need to be with life maybe this is my step forward.going back again to step one does not help.Nightmares started again and fear Im not going to survive and find some kind of happines is in my mind again.Im not going to go on with the seminars.I miss you all my far away friends.TENY

Happy birthday Mary Linda.I hope next birthday willbe easier for you.Love from far away.TENY

Hellow Marsha Im sorry Im not a good coock but but even if I was the food you are coocking is unknown here.Do you want a recipe for Greek food?Love from far away.TENY

Dear Marty.I want to join calender but did not understand the way to doit.Please help me how to start .Thank you .TENY

Dear Kim Its good to know you are Ok.Iwas thinking of you it has been quiet lately here alot of odl friends are not posting.I did not know about the fire .What happened?Moving is hard but maybe changing places gives you the oportunity of a new life .I know its not the life we dreamed for but maybe its going to be better than our fears for the future.Im gratefull for my far away family and hope that I will hear some good news from all of you .Love from far away.TENY

Hellow my friends .Thank you for your repllys I asked the same question my sister in law and she told me < why do you have to go you are ready yourself to write a book about death and lonlynes>.Well I will folow your advise and follow the corse.I have been told that I can get money back if I can not cope for any reason.Starting next month so I will post all about Thank you my far away friends .TENY

Hellow my far away friends Im feeling not progresing and cry every day I can not find joy even in the coming of my new grandaughter.The American gollege of Greece has a program of continuing education .Seminars are taking place next month and one of them is about death and lonlynes.I can not deside if its going to be of any help or it will bring me down in the very begining of my grief.Please give me advise.TENY

MIKE Can you hear me from far away?Happy birthdayand hope next one will be easier.TENY

Happy birthday and many thanks from my heart.You have saved me by beeing here as nothing that could help is in Greece.Your far away friend TENY

Best wishes from far away.hope this year you find some colors in your life.TENY

Mary I do understand your pain.I lost my husband 2 years ago and Im taking care of my mother who is 90.My thoughts are the same why GOD this is not fair.I know we can not change anything and its hard to go on.You are young and I wish abetter future for you.Here is the place you will find caring friends that realy understand.I living in Greece some of friends may be closer to where you live.Do you have familly?Your far away friend TENY

Hellow my friends Last week it was 27 months but I was again very sick and did not post.since last spring that I have been in hospital with pneumonia I have not fully recover.Not feeling well make me stuck to my pain. and my dr says Im stuck cause I havenot found any otherway of livingbut only through my pain.Griefis my identityMY world is gray I remember that I did not even want to surviveIm here after 27 months willI ever find other colors ? John at his last post gave some hope but it is not geting easier Itis good to know my far away friends do understand ..Thank you .TENY

John Thank you for trying to send me the presentation .I did not receive it yet.Teny

Thank you for giving us hope for briter colors.I try to email without suxes .Can you please send the presentationmy email is teny@ath.forthnet.gr .I hope I will receive it.TENY

Unconditional love is what I gave and received.Is the part of myself that Im missing is him that is gone and vever find again but most of all I can not forgive myself for not beeing with him when he died.I was so scared and numb .The doctors kept me out of the room my sons were with him.Reading what Dusky says about realising the best of people when they are close to the end I wish that I could have been more brave and and be in the room.Althouh I have been told that the end is near I had my ears closed and make believe that we will return home and have more time together.I feel quilty for not giving the unconditional love when it was mostly needed.Your far away friend YENY

Thank you my far away friends its so good you are here for me.Some of you recomented activities well I do have my job with ups and downs I go to the gym and Im a member in sorptimist organisation.Its anon profit international org for women and doing alot of charity work also education for children that have no way of going to school.Last sunday we went to a mountain that was in fire lst summer and together with enviroment org we planted 40000 new trees.Im in the run all day to keep body and mind bussy but what obout the sleeples nights? what about the loving arms and the one and only person you would like tobe there to ask you how was your day my love?Thank you.TENY

Hellow my friends it has been 2 years since I lost Yiany and most of you know my pain and strugle.All this time I have not think of my grandmother who was areal face of grief.she lost her 2 children in2 years appart and her husband the next year.I remember her in black never smiling.she left her other 3 kids my father was the eldest and went to a monastery.when she grew old she returned to her island and was respected from the natives as a nun helping other people that were sufering.I thought that she would be the one that understands what IM going through.Doe s any of you believe that people and close relatives that are dead can help us?I have started asking for her help .Is this normal or im loosing my mind not beeing able to axept my life has changed for ever and happiness is only in the past.Thank you my far away friends.TENY

Dear WENDY Your words brought tears in my eyes.Im so sorry you hurt but I know the feeling.cause every night I have this horrible lonely feeling.During the day that Im working it is easier but when night falls how can you forget the arms that were arownd you?You have been here for me the past 2 years and thank you so much.Hope tommorow is another day.Love from far away TENY

Dear Gail .Your words gould be mine we started to travel the road and life we did not order almost together .My 2 years were 2 months ago.I know how you feel and you know how I feel that is the best thing for us posting here.I wish that we have met in diferend sircumstances but Im grateful we found eachother the time we needed someone to realy understand.I hope you find happines again and next anniversary will be with less pain.Love from far away.TENY

Hellow my far away friends I was feeling very depressed but I had to pool myself together for the sake of my bruther and sister in law that again in hospital .Remember that she strugles with 3 times a week dyalisis.Her name is Clare and had complication and went under a very dificult surgurythat lasted 6 hours.I have been in the same place Yianny died and it is hard .Memories of his strugle for life game back together with fear that a person I love is also sufering. Life keeps me going giving alot of tears alot or fearsbut around the corner some hope for good news.My daughter in law had all her tests and all are normal and her pregnasy is progresing.She is now at the 5th month and with all your prayers I will welcome a new babygirl in the family.I need you prayers for the new life to come.Anna my daughter in law had problems getting pregnand and lost last year her first baby.Thank you all for beeing here .Your far awau friend.TENY