enna Posted July 10, 2014 Report Share Posted July 10, 2014 You have helped so many of us along our journey ~ we are here for you. Our ears and hearts are open. I love the picture of Bentley. When days are hard for you please keep in mind that you have a whole army of souls standing with you. Come here and feel the love that we send out to you. Hugs. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
feralfae Posted July 10, 2014 Report Share Posted July 10, 2014 Ditto all of the above ^^^ and more love is wafting your way, disguised, of course, as *<fairy dust>*. Come here and let us {{{HUG}}} and ***LOVE*** you as often as you wish. Turn your focus inward to you and Bentley and Bill. We will muddle through. Really. Please accept with open heart the gift of this love we are all sending to you, asking only that you, in return, realize that we are merely recycling the love you share with us. I honor your Holy Journey. Peace and Light. *<twinkles>* namaste, fae Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wifflesnook Posted July 10, 2014 Report Share Posted July 10, 2014 There are enough of us to try to help others as well as share our own pain, Mary. Thank you for thinking of others whilst you are going through this hard time. Our thoughts are with you as you know. Jan Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ohsosad Posted July 10, 2014 Report Share Posted July 10, 2014 Does anyone know how old Bentley is? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MartyT Posted July 10, 2014 Report Share Posted July 10, 2014 Bentley is 11 years old. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kayc Posted July 10, 2014 Report Share Posted July 10, 2014 Mary, thinking of you and Bentley today and hoping for the comfort and endurance to get through today...no thought for tomorrow, it will be here soon enough. Arlie and I send you our best. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Queeniemary Posted July 11, 2014 Report Share Posted July 11, 2014 Bentley is your priority right now, and we would not have it any other way. Words are not coming right now, just know that you and Bentley are greatly loved, and are in my thoughts and prayers. QMary Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LarrysGirl Posted July 11, 2014 Report Share Posted July 11, 2014 Don't worry about us Mary, we will help each other while you take care of yourself and Bentley. You are missed and we love you but take the time you need right now, Deborah Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
feralfae Posted July 12, 2014 Report Share Posted July 12, 2014 Dear Mary and Dear Bentley, As our side of the planet prepares for slumbers, I am sending love and prayers for you, and wishing you a peaceful and love-filled night of beautiful dreams. fae Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kayc Posted July 12, 2014 Report Share Posted July 12, 2014 Amen! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Queeniemary Posted July 12, 2014 Report Share Posted July 12, 2014 Dear Mary and Bentley, woke up with you both on my mind. I hope this weekend is much better for dear Bentley than last weekend. Sorry some vets are so disappointing, but glad that you seem to have some that understand. Just as I would not want to go through chemo, or other drastic measures, why would we want to put our beloved pets through the pain. Holding you and Bentley in my heart today. Traveling with my daughter today to be with my sis in Little Rock. Looking forward to a few hours alone with my daughter in the car, don't get that much anymore, as she travels so much for work. Praying for a good weekend for our Bentley. QMary Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mfh Posted July 12, 2014 Author Report Share Posted July 12, 2014 QMary, thank you so much. You have also been on my mind since you learned of your sister's illness and surgery. I am so glad you will be able to be with her and also with your daughter. You sister and all of you are in my heart and in my prayers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mfh Posted July 12, 2014 Author Report Share Posted July 12, 2014 Thanks to all of you. Bentley has had a much better week. The new holistic vet comes a week from and that can not come fast enough. If all goes as planned, we will develop a care plan. I am definitely back in caregiver mode. I focus hard on this being a slow growing cancer and am adjusting to the fact that he does in deed have cancer. That took my breath away as you can all imagine. Yesterday I read an extremely helpful book by Laurie Kaplan, who I plan to talk to, about your dog and cancer....diet, treatment, everything. Marty is right. Bentley will be 11 shortly, Oct. 4 and I am hoping he will see 11, 12, and maybe 13 but I know he may not see any of those or all of those. This is a major lesson in living in the now and enjoying today...a lesson Bentley always teaches. I learned from his breeder last night that his mother, Crystal, also has lymphoma and is 13 1/2. They are not the same kind but the fact that she is 13 is encouraging. I do not know how long they have known. What I do know is that it would have been very possible for me not to know about Bentley's cancer were it not for all the GI problems since mid-May that led to all the treatment and tests. I do not know how long this has been growing. I refuse to subject him to the tests needed to get some sort of idea of how long he has....as even with all those tests, no one would really knows. The symptoms he has had for 2 months are now under control...at least so far since Sunday night. That could change in 5 minutes.... So it is time for me to be caregiver and at the same time enjoy each moment, each day. Sometimes I have to leave the room for the tears as I want to be as upbeat as I can most, not all of the time. He is, like his father (Bill) a very sensitive dog. Feels everything. Thanks for your love and care. I am back now but if needed I will sit back again and notify you when I will do that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KATPILOT Posted July 12, 2014 Report Share Posted July 12, 2014 Thinking of you Mary and hoping Bentley does indeed get to see that 13th year. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mfh Posted July 12, 2014 Author Report Share Posted July 12, 2014 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kayc Posted July 12, 2014 Report Share Posted July 12, 2014 My dear Mary, you are doing all that you can and I know you'll continue to give your best to Bentley. We all know that our pets will only live a short few years and that we'll likely outlive them...and honestly, I wouldn't want it the other way around, I wouldn't want Arlie to be left without me and have to adjust to another household. But still, knowing this, even when we adopt them, it doesn't make it any easier to grasp. You are handling it right, taking a day at a time, enjoying the present moment, for that is the best route for all of us. We never know the day nor hour when our pet's time will come. We cannot be prepared for us, but only live as you are doing. I'm so glad Bentley's week was better! And I'm glad you have an appt. with a holistic vet. We'll hope for the best outcome. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ohsosad Posted July 12, 2014 Report Share Posted July 12, 2014 Some years ago I had a dog with throat cancer who received chemo, and more recently a dog with mammary cancer who received chemo, and neither had any negative reactions to the treatments, which was what the vets had told me at the time. I trusted they were right which was why I agreed to it, and in fact they were. With the second dog the chemo did indeed extend her life for many months, and since she did not have any bad reaction to the treatments, I believe it was a good decision for her. The vet I took her to was a cancer specialist and apparently knew what he was doing. Just wanted to put a word in about it. Both vets made it clear that chemo for dogs is not dreadful as it can be for humans. Of course every case is different. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mfh Posted July 12, 2014 Author Report Share Posted July 12, 2014 Dear Ohsosad, Thank you for sharing. I am so glad that in both situations the chemo worked for your dogs with no side effects. Yes, each case is different and though I would not choose chemo it is also not recommended in this situation. This cancer is so rare and newly discovered, the treatments are not known yet. I do thank you for your post. Mary Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kayc Posted July 13, 2014 Report Share Posted July 13, 2014 Yes, every situation is different, I think you have to weigh all the factors and decide accordingly. A friend of mine had two dogs with cancer, they did surgery (one lost a leg) and chemo and both came through well, but they are three and four years old, she said she would have decided differently had they been older. Much harder for older dogs plus you have to weigh quality of life for the time they likely have left anyway. With Bentley being nearly 11 I wouldn't elect for chemo either...I had a golden retriever that got cancer in the brain, he was ten, I had to have him put to sleep. As heart breaking as it'd be for me to lose Arlie, I can't imagine putting him through all that at 11. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mfh Posted July 13, 2014 Author Report Share Posted July 13, 2014 https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=1441186739439266&fref=nf This is truly amazing. Turtles born. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ohsosad Posted July 13, 2014 Report Share Posted July 13, 2014 One of my precious dogs had degenerative myelopathy and gradually lost the use of her hind legs. She used wheels for nine months and did well - she was a feisty girl. Then she began to stumble on her front legs and was having more and more trouble. With a heavy heart I made that awful decision to let her go before things got worse. For months afterwards I agonized over whether or not I had made the right decision. The next time I saw my vet we talked about it, and he said something I'll never forget which helped me. He said, you took her to the edge of the cliff but didn't let her go over. I see many dog parents wait too long to let them go which they do for their own benefit and not for the dog. Our final gift to these precious souls is to walk with them when their days are coming to an end and spare them unnecessary pain. Would that we could do that for our human companions. As I watched my husband suffer and struggle to breathe day after day, I thought of what I had done for Whitney and wished the medical profession would allow the same peaceful end for Steve. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mfh Posted July 13, 2014 Author Report Share Posted July 13, 2014 Your vet's statement is quite powerful...taking our fur babies to the edge of the cliff without letting them go over. What a lovely thought. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kayc Posted July 13, 2014 Report Share Posted July 13, 2014 It's true. My precious granddoggy, Skye, went through that. couldn't control his front paws, they began turning under and he'd stumble. We got him shoes to protect his paws. Gradually,he could no longer walk. My son made him a walker, but it was no time at all and he couldn't use it. Then we took him on "walks" in a wagon. He loved it! He was sweet and stoic, non-complaining, clear to the end. He had other problems going on too, and that's what got him, he finally had to be put to sleep but they should have done it sooner, I'm afraid he suffered and that last day was definitely one day too many. It breaks my heart, he was the sweetest dog ever. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mfh Posted July 13, 2014 Author Report Share Posted July 13, 2014 Kay, it is so difficult to know the right time. I believe Bill and I were about a day late also with our Buffy. We do our best. I had coffee last week with a veterinarian in my area who only does home euthanasia. She said there is no way she can maintain a practice and also be at someone's home when she is needed so she has chosen to specialize in this kind act. Her website contains helpful information about knowing the time and understanding the process... I am posting it here in case someone ever needs the information she provides. She is a caring person who is doing so much good. http://www.hilstvet.com/determining-when-is-it-time-euthanasia/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kayc Posted July 13, 2014 Report Share Posted July 13, 2014 Well I always felt when they no longer have quality of life and they're suffering, it's time. But Skye was very stoic and we didn't realize his level of suffering until AFTER it was too late. Hindsight is always easier. The same with my cat, George. If he hadn't been misdiagnosed, I would have had him put to sleep a month sooner. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now