MartyT Posted February 6, 2015 Report Share Posted February 6, 2015 Harry, my dear, without going into sordid detail, I've struggled with scoliosis since the age of five, and with osteoarthritis, degenerative disk disease and osteoporosis as I've grown older. I have a condition called fibroelastic diathesis ~ meaning that my connective tissue is more elastic than normal, which predisposes me to bone deformities. I've had four spinal fusions, one total knee replacement and three (yes, I said three) total hip replacements, and a number of surgeries on both my feet. You asked what I am doing for my joints, and there wasn't much I could do since most of my issues stemmed from the scoliosis. Over the years it affected the way I walk, and eventually it caused major wear and tear on my knee and hips, grinding away most of the cartilage in those joints. Nowadays scoliosis can be surgically corrected and progressive curvature of the spine can be prevented ~ but mine began back in the early 1950s, when all they knew to do was to wait until my bones stopped growing, which for me was around the age of 12, then they fused the curvatures in place so they would not get any worse. I have a double curvature, so my spine is in the shape of an "S," leaving one hip higher than the other. Way more than you wanted to know, I am sure ~ but that's my story Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HAP Posted February 6, 2015 Author Report Share Posted February 6, 2015 Dear Marty, Wow. I have no words. Peace, Harry Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
enna Posted February 6, 2015 Report Share Posted February 6, 2015 And I will never complain about my hang nail issues again! Sending chocolates, hugs, horses, flowers, dogs, ice cream, and roses to you, Marty. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MartyT Posted February 6, 2015 Report Share Posted February 6, 2015 We each have our stories, dear Harry. And yes, dear Anne ~ all my favorites included. Thank you! ♥ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Queeniemary Posted February 6, 2015 Report Share Posted February 6, 2015 Marty, thank you for sharing your story. You are such an amazing person, and I am very sorry that you have had such a rough time all your life with this problem, and that it has caused so many other problems for you. Yet through it all, you remain a positive caring person, always looking to help others. We are so fortunate to have your guidance here on this site. QMary Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
feralfae Posted February 6, 2015 Report Share Posted February 6, 2015 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kayc Posted February 7, 2015 Report Share Posted February 7, 2015 Wow! Marty, I had no idea! How one endures so much pain and discomfort, I have no idea, but I guess you endure it much the same way as you've learned to do grief...one day at a time, one foot in front of the other (when you can). Anne...I will, (complain about hang nail issues), I'm a whiner. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
enna Posted February 7, 2015 Report Share Posted February 7, 2015 Oh, me too Kay. I have never tolerated pain very well! And as Marty said, "We all have our stories." I have found that indulging in my most favorite things helps me. For one physical therapy, I give myself two pieces of fudge; for one trip to the dental surgeon I have earned two scoops of double chocolate ice cream; for the cardiac cath I endured I convinced myself that lemon bars would be a nice way to treat myself. It is a good thing I have some self-control when it comes to sweet treats! Yesterday I left my physical therapy building without using my cane again and feeling so happy that I had completed a successful session. One of my therapists (I have two) commented that what we are doing is working. I have been going three days a week for an hour and fifteen-minute sessions. My gift to myself is to be free of all doctors by April ~ Jim's birthday memorial. Anne Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MartyT Posted February 7, 2015 Report Share Posted February 7, 2015 Kay, my dear, if I were to pick a word to describe you (or Anne, or Fae, or any of our other members), "whiner" is the last one that would occur to me. Anne, dear heart, I know it isn't easy, but I am SO happy that your PT is working so well for you. I know it's because you are so determined to make it work. Hooray for you! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shalady Posted February 7, 2015 Report Share Posted February 7, 2015 Marty, you certainly have endured more than most. How wonderful you can put it all aside and help others. I hope you know how much you are appreciated. I wish you strength as you keep your positive attitude. Kay and Anne, you are not whiners. Just because we share our lives here we do not consider it whining. We all are going through so much. It is good to be able to express our feelings. My indulgence is sugar free ice cream. Shalady Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Queeniemary Posted February 7, 2015 Report Share Posted February 7, 2015 Anne, you are such a determined person, I have no doubt you will be free from the doctors by April! I am happy to hear how much the therapy is helping you, and that your therapists agree!! Kay, Harry, Fae , you all meet any illness, or bumps in the road with the same determination that Anne shows. I gain strength from all of you and Marty. My positive today: I am going with my brother and sister in law to Branson to spend the night. We are celebrating two things. Today is my sister in law's birthday, and our great niece plays in a band, called Deadwoodgrove, and they are playing at the Outback bar and grill in Branson tonight. My niece Sherry (mother of the one in band) and her husband will be there also from Melbourne. A much needed break for Sherry. We are planning to just have a good time. I have never heard the band before, so not sure what to expect. I think they are mostly country (not my favorite), but will still have fun. My brother and sister in law will be here in about an hour. My brother called me secretly this morning to have me order a coconut cream pie from one of the restaurants, that he could pick up when he got in town. Joyce's favorite. I did that, and we will have a piece of her BD pie before heading on to Branson. One of my favorites also... On a less positive note, there has been no real change in my sister now for months. We have lost expectation of any change. She is trapped in a body that will not respond to her commands. Some days she is very alert and talkative, but most days she is quiet and sleeps a lot. I think it is her escape. In her dreams I am sure she is playing her piano again. I will be going over for a visit with her next week. Always come away with a heavy heart, to see her like this... QMary Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kayc Posted February 7, 2015 Report Share Posted February 7, 2015 QMary, I am sorry about your sister, I'm sure it helps her a lot to have your visits, but it has to be frustrating to her to not be able to respond at will. In her dreams she is happy and whole still. I hope you have a great time celebrating you SIL's birthday and getting to hear the band...I am jealous because I LOVE country music! (and coconut cream pie) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kayc Posted February 7, 2015 Report Share Posted February 7, 2015 Anne, I am so glad your PT is working! How great to have a goal before you that you know you can accomplish and you will be celebrating come April! Your fudge rewards sound good! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MartyT Posted February 7, 2015 Report Share Posted February 7, 2015 QMary, I'm so sorry about your sister. Given her love of the piano, have you considered giving her an iPod or an Mp3 player so she can listen to piano music ~ or to a playlist of her favorite songs? I watched an amazing movie this past week (Alive Inside) that you might want to see, too. It's about the power of music and how it can be used to help people with dementia and those in nursing homes. It's available on Netflix, if you have access to that ~ but if not, you can watch a clip of the movie on YouTube, here: You can read more about it here: Music & Memory Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HAP Posted February 8, 2015 Author Report Share Posted February 8, 2015 Dear friends, So much good news from so many people today on here. QMary, I am so sorry hear about your sister. I had a very strange experience this morning. I had a very vivid dream of Jane--so vivid I could feel her arms around me and mine around her. When I got up, I did my usual Saturday chores--cleaning the kitchen and bathroom--then went to the cemetery. My brain felt pretty scattered there today because of that dream. When I came home I installed some curtain rods in the basement and put up some insulated curtains down there. I've already put curtains over the front door and the door to the basement. The weather has been so cold this year that I am plugging even the smallest potential leaks as best I can. Keeping the living room, dining room and kitchen--which share a cathedral ceiling--warm enough has been a challenge for much of the winter. The basement has been in the low 50s much of the last month. The curtains down there really change the way the space feels. Lately, with the curtains closed whenever there is no direct sunlight coming through the windows, the house feels increasingly like a cave and it makes me a bit claustrophobic. I am close enough to the coast that I will get much less snow than they are getting further inland. Boston may get another two feet--that will be six feet in the last 15 days. I have no idea what they are doing with it. We aren't seeing much melting between storms, either. But the larder is well stocked--and I'll bake bread for the week tomorrow. I have books to read and movies to watch--and plenty of candles and lanterns if the power goes out. QMary, enjoy the band, Anne enjoy the PT progress, and Marty, thanks for being here for all of us when we need a shoulder. Be well, everyone. Peace, Harry Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MartyT Posted February 8, 2015 Report Share Posted February 8, 2015 You be well, too, dear Harry, and thank you for being here for all of us, too ♥ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kayc Posted February 8, 2015 Report Share Posted February 8, 2015 Harry, I had six feet of snow at once when I was pregnant with my daughter...I hope never to again! I hope the curtains help with retaining heat, I remember back in the 70s people used insulated drapes, they had a kind of foam backing that was supposed to help with heat, I'm not sure why they went out but decorating has always been in eras. I'm glad you aren't getting as much snow as further inland! Marty, thank you for sharing that. I witnessed my mom reacting to music from her time when she was at the dementia care center. It was hard because she'd get so emotional and cry and cry, I think it was a medicine they had her on, which I talked to them about changing or reducing. She wasn't normally a crier unless she had a reason to be upset, but it seemed she'd cry over everything. I do remember her singing "Crazy" (Patsy Cline) just a couple weeks before she died, that floored me because I'd never heard her sing it or listen to it, but I guess she went further back in time when she was younger. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shalady Posted February 8, 2015 Report Share Posted February 8, 2015 Marty, thanks for posting the video. That is fantastic. I remember my Mom enjoying Lawrence Welk every week, even in her dementia. She lived with us in her last three years. Sometimes, when I would prepare a meal and I would let her know it was time to eat, she would think I was her "Mum". She would be having a conversation with me and I was Mum. It was startling at first but I got used too it. She was a dear, adorable and wonderful Mom and I miss her. Shalady Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HAP Posted February 8, 2015 Author Report Share Posted February 8, 2015 Dear friends, I did my weekly bread baking this morning. I'm still playing with the recipe. I had so,me loafs a couple weeks ago that had a big hollow space at the top of the loaf--which I seem to have solved by not pushing the rising time out beyond an hour. The loaves are still smaller than I'd like, so I've been increasing both the flour and the liquids. I think part of the issue may be the size of the pans, but it's hard to know for certain. Today also seemed like a good laundry day since it is in the upper 20s to low 30s. The heavy snow won't arrive until early this evening--and we expect some freezing rain at some point overnight. Locally, we only expect 4-8 inches which, in a normal winter, would be a major storm for us. But this year we have been measuring things in feet, so this qualifies as a smaller storm here. Boston, on the other hand, is getting as much as two feet before this winds down. I have no idea where they are going to put all this--no idea where Fall River is going to put even this amount, honestly. I started the research piece of my beekeeping plan today by looking at what plants make good pollen and nectar sources for bees. While some of the flowers I like made the list, a lot didn't make the cut--which surprised me a little since hummingbirds and butterflies approve of them. It is also clear that I was wise to decide to give myself this year to do the prep work. Getting new flower beds built and planting fruit trees is not something I can do overnight--and certainly not by early spring. Kay, I bought some foam backed curtains for the basement project. Unfortunately, It doesn't seem to have made much difference down there. The temperature this morning was no different than normal. Sigh. At least the curtains give it a slightly more finished look. On the other hand, the curtains at the front door and on the cellar door seem to make a difference upstairs. When I open them there is an immediate release of cooler air that would otherwise be coming right up the stairs--and the living room feels much more comfortable than it has. I talked with someone today who has run several charity golf tournaments. I need to figure out some things, but the potential is certainly interesting. That's something for next week. Time to go run the vacuum and get something to eat. Peace, Harry Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
enna Posted February 9, 2015 Report Share Posted February 9, 2015 It is good to know you are still working on that perfect loaf of bread, Harry. I am surprised that your bees, hummers and butterflies don't all get along. What fruit trees are you thinking of planting? I have lemons and Arizona Sweet orange trees. Many around here have grapefruit so we all share. It took about a year and a half before I had a great crop. We have so many opportunities for golf tournaments here in sunny Arizona ~ something to think about for a NETS fundraiser. Anne Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HAP Posted February 9, 2015 Author Report Share Posted February 9, 2015 Dear Anne, The creatures all get along fine. But apparently they like radically different food sources Hummers, for example really like petunias and impatiens but bees prefer other flowers instead. I thought all nectar plants would have similar attraction for everyone. Apparently I was wrong. Unfortunately, lemons, oranges, and grapefruit, while wonderful where bees are concerned, don't do well in New England, though they can do well in containers. I once had a lemon tree in a bucket. Unfortunately, I don't have much left for window space. Are you saying you want to take point for a golf tournament in Arizona? I need to know a lot more about running a tournament from a practical standpoint before I try to take that piece national. Peace, Harry Peace, Harry Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
enna Posted February 9, 2015 Report Share Posted February 9, 2015 A possible Golf Fundraiser in sunny Arizona for Walking with Jane Net cancer research… We have so many golf courses right in my backyard, Harry. I’ll talk to a few of the pro shops and ask some questions about fundraisers. I like this idea at the Wigwam and I know people here in my community will play golf just because they can. I’ll e-mail you since this is not the place to talk about it. I don't want to get a "warning" from our moderator!!! If it flies maybe you’ll HAVE to come to AZ to put in an appearance. http://www.wigwamgolf.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/08/hgo_brochure_LS.pdf My positive today ~ high 85, sunny and dry… Some of my bushes are starting to show flowers. I so wish I could send my weather to the Midwest and to the New England area. Anne Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kayc Posted February 9, 2015 Report Share Posted February 9, 2015 Anne, 85 in February? Hard to imagine! We're having high winds here today, some rain, but not really cold. This has been the weirdest winter ever for us! Harry, I didn't know that, I'll have to plant some impatiens then for the hummers. If you know of anything honeybees like, please let me know...my apple trees didn't even get pollinated last year! I used to have honeybees here, but don't see them anymore, I've never used pesticides on my grass/flowers/trees. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LadyCarrie Posted February 10, 2015 Report Share Posted February 10, 2015 I have a positive that might sound like a negative at first. The negative is that Jerry cannot walk a block without hip pain causing him to “buckle.” The positive is that we bought a transport chair and a wheelchair while in Modesto recently. After my initial adjustment to seeing Jerry in a wheelchair (tears hidden behind a smile), I choose to see his having a wheelchair as a positive. We knew it was time to buy a wheelchair one day last November when Jerry was scheduled for an echocardiogram. There were no parking spaces at the hospital. On our first trip around, Jerry refused to use a handicapped parking space, because someone needier than he might need it. After the second trip around the entire grounds, he consented to take a handicapped space. There were none available. I called the cardiologist’s office, to tell them that we were “cruising” the parking lot, and trying frantically to find a space. We had to park several blocks away, and walk back to the hospital. As we walked past the helicopter pad, Jerry’s hip kept causing him to buckle, and nearly fall. He had to stop every few feet, while I held him up by his belt at his back. This was humiliating for him. He never said so, but I know him. He’s always been such a man of dignity and strength. I kept watching for the helicopter, because loud noise can cause me to lose my hearing indefinitely due to Meniere’s (happened long ago; required trip to UCSF). I learned that day that the difference in Jerry’s height (6 ft.) and mine (5 ft. 4 in.) is too great for me to keep him upright easily. It was time to buy a chair. We purchased the chairs the day Jerry had his sutures removed after lesion removal ten days prior. After we purchased the chairs, our driver put them into the car, and we went to eat lunch. While we ate, we realized we could now go to the mall, which we hadn’t been able to do in two years. What a sense of freedom! We headed to Macy’s and to the Jones of New York department, but the department appeared to have been relocated. As I browsed through the clothes where Jones used to be, Jerry disappeared on me. I had not considered there is nothing wrong with those long arms of his. Because of his height, he’s always been easy to spot in stores, but not so in a wheelchair. Because I recently had a basal cell removed from my nose, I cannot yet wear my glasses. There I was alone, my vision quite blurred, stuck between too-close-together clothes racks, and claustrophobic while Jerry was zipping somewhere around Macy’s. My mind raced with thoughts of all the things that could happen to him without him having a way to let me know. I learned later he had been searching for Jones to make it easier for me to find. Amberly laughed out loud when I told her what had happened to me. She said, “Daddy’s got wheels.” Yes, Daddy definitely has wheels. I can push him speedily up and down the mall now (chair helps me walk easier), but he can also speedily disappear on me. We’ll have to work this out. We were told that Macy’s is phasing out their Jones of New York line. They had only a few pieces left. Later, I went to Macy’s online, and was happy to find some things I wanted. When I tried to pay for them, I got, “Unavailable.” It must be true that Macy’s will not be carrying Jones of New York. As we were leaving Macy’s, Jerry suggested that we stop at the Estee Lauder counter, a long-time favorite hangout for Amberly and me. It was late in the day, and I was concerned the fog would roll back into the Valley, but Jerry wanted me to shop while I had opportunity (bless his dear heart). I decided we had time for me to buy a cream to help with the application of my foundation since I already knew the product I wanted to buy. The girl at the counter misunderstood. She scrutinized my face from what felt like about six inches from my nose, while I wondered for a few seconds what on earth she was doing. She assessed my face as requiring the $285.00 luxury cream for my wrinkles. I said that we needed to forget my wrinkles for the present, but I’d like to buy the kind of cream I use already. She said that I could buy the kind “at the other end of the counter” if I needed to (referring to the “inexpensive” kind I use). I told her that I thought it better for me if I order online. It was a mistake to put Coach and Michael Kors purses so near the makeup counter, for those kept drawing my attention away from the Estee Lauder counter. In truth, I resisted those also. I reminded myself these are days of retirement, and I behaved myself. I don’t travel any longer, and I need neither a Coach nor a Michael Kors to take to the rose garden. My well-worn jeans with Jerry’s old business shirts (long enough on me to be a mini-dress), and scruffy shoes work quite well. I could not be more content. Amberly told me later that it is “illegal to stomp a hole in a twenty-year-old twerp at a makeup counter who has yet to grow a wrinkle.” Hmmmm. I had not realized that my daughter could understand. My wrinkles came from many smiles and much laughter as we traveled around our awesome country and spectacular Canada; a lot of sun shining into my eyes and onto my face; many happy events; so much just living life; and experiencing both joy and pain. I’m not happy to have my wrinkles, but I wear them with comfort, for I know I won’t meet anyone wearing a set of wrinkles identical to mine anywhere I go. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LadyCarrie Posted February 10, 2015 Report Share Posted February 10, 2015 Harry, Yes, please do share what you learn about what honey bees like to eat. We do have a few honey bees---and a lot of "meat" bees (a wasp; the meanest bug on earth!). Carrie Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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