Maryo

Hi Maxine. I also am sorry for the loss of your husband.I know life is hard right now.I have been at this for almost 17 months and Christmas makes it even harder. I have found great comforting people on this site who are helping me on my grief journey.Try not to look to far ahead in the future. It will take alot of energy just to get through each day.It will get better please believe that. Mary Lou

Ted, Thank you. Christmas is very stressful and it is so important to be extra kind to ourselves. Take care. Mary Lou

Hi Kath, Sometimes it feels like we have completely lost ourselves the way we where but things will calm down. Nothing wrong with making a list if we can remember where we put the list. That has happened more times then I care to remember. I hope tomorrow is a better day for us all. Mary Lou

Kimi, I also will keep you and your daughter in my prayers tonight. Mary Lou

Hi Rochel. I hope you are managing in California.I know there is no place like home when you are grieving. I like to think our loved ones are with us. Just because we can't see them doesn't mean they can't hear us.I am a big believer in prayer. Take care. Mary Lou

Hi Laurie, Thank you. I will look up Surviving the Holidays.I hope all of your memories of your husband will bring you joy and peace this Christmas. Take care. Mary Lou

Hi Everyone, If it where possible I think we would all blink our eyes and have the holidays over, but it's not so the tree is up, the lights are on outside and the cards are on the table waiting for me.This is my second Christmas without my husband and it feels a little harder, but my daughter keeps me from feeling to sorry for myself. I promised her Dad near the end we would look after each other but she mostly looks after me. Even at 25 she loves Christmas so her enthusiasm has to rub off a little on me.I still cry and she tells me it will be ok, I trust in God that it will be ok. I just need a little more time. Take care. Mary Lou

Hi Kat, Donating your Christmas tree from last year is very thoughtful. I know how hard it is to find joy at this time but the love we have for our loved ones will help us get through this holiday. I have to believe this because the other option is to curl up in bed and I don't want to do that. Prayers and best wishes for everyone. Mary Lou

Hi Vickie, Thank you for reminding us about the gift of life. This will be the 2nd Christmas without my husband and I think it is harder this year. I'm not sure why, maybe because I am at the acceptance stage and my mind is accepting this but my heart is still fighting with me.For anyone who is in the early stages of grief I don't want to scare anyone. I pray that peace will come earlier for everyone. I have read that the 18th month peaks all your emotions again and then it will get easier. Everyone grieves differently. Sending lots of prayers and wishes for everyone. Mary Lou

Debbie, Christmas is such a hard time of year when you loss a loved one as all of us have. But you are doing something very special with your Memory Tree and I hope it will bring you much comfort and peace. Take care. Mary Lou

Hi Caroline, I am sorry about the loss of your husband Ed. My husband died 16 months ago and I still have lonely days. This site helps me daily. It's like I have many friends from far away. Even though I can't see them I know they will be there for me.Take one day at a time. Looking to far ahead can be to much to handle right now. Take care. Mary Lou

I will remember Wendy and her family in my prayers tonight. Mary Lou

Hi Amy, It is 11 PM my time and Sunday is almost over.I want to wish you a better day tomorrow. When I am feeling down and I need something to put a smile on my face I watch Two and a half Men. It might sound like a silly thing to do but they make me laugh and it helps me get through the day. Take care. Mary Lou

Thanks Boo, This will be my second Christmas without my husband. I hope it will a bit easier. Take care. Mary Lou

Kath, Thank you for sharing your picture with us and the beautiful words. Take care. Mary Lou

Thank you Kat for the lovely poem. I guess one day we will find the answers to life and death. I know that guilt is a hard cross to bare but we are all given free will and as much as we try to help our loved ones we can't make them do something they didn't want to do. All we can do is give them lots of love even when they are no longer with us, and we can ask for forgiveness and forgive them. Take care. Mary Lou

Hi Mrs. B, I hope tomorrow is a better day for you.We all have blue days but when more time passes I find they become less and less. Take care. Mary Lou

Hi Lucia, I hope you and your family find comfort today with all your 33 years of special memories. Take care. Mary Lou

Hi Debbie, There are many stages of grief and shock is one of them.We have to go through each one to make us a whole person again. I wish it could be easier and would not take as long but it is not to be.I pray that you will have a better day tomorrow. Take care. Mary Lou

Steely, I can feel your pain.It will get better. You are in the early stages of grief. I remember that time. My husband has been gone 15 months now.The pain is not so bad now. I am enjoying life again little by little. It is different now. I still cry, but I have many things to look forward to and many memories.Please take it a day at a time.I hope this has helped you a little. Take care. Mary Lou

Hi PK, I am sorry about the loss of your husband.I just wanted to welcome you. This is a good place to come for comfort and understanding.People here understand about this difficult grief journey. Mary Lou

Hi everyone. I justed wanted to share something. The first 9 months after my husband died when I looked in the mirror I hardly recognized myself. I have a picture on the fridge of my daughter and me smiling in happier times. I kept on wishing I could get back to that person.It's been 15 months now and I am a changed person. I will always miss my husband, and I sometimes have to run to my car to cry but I can see me again in the mirror most days and it feels good. One day the pain will be a little less. Grief has its own timetable and it can't be rushed. Take care. Mary Lou

I received a e-mail yesterday letting me know that a lady I worked with has been told her husband has only two week's to live.It brought back so many sad memories. I feel so bad because I know what she will have to go through and it isn't something you can prepare for. They have to find out themselves.I guess in a small way it is a blessing because many people don't get the chance to say good-bye. Take care everyone. Mary Lou

Hi Steely, The first few months of grieving are the worst, but it will get easier. I still cry after 15 months but for a shorter period of time.I guess I am in the acceptance stage. I'm not happy that I have to go on without my husband but I can't change it so I wake up each morning put on my face and go out into the world. Grieving can't be rushed. I had to learn to be patient with myself and take one day at a time and don't look to far into the future. Take care. Mary Lou

Hi Linda, I hope tomorrow will be a good day for you and you will find comfort in having your Son home.It does get easier.Just take one day at a time. Take care. Mary Lou