LostnEmpty Posted July 11, 2009 Report Share Posted July 11, 2009 Just want to let you all know I had my baby Tabitha on July 7th at 4:19 pm. she weighed 7lbs 9oz and is 17 1/2inches. She looks just like Marc. This is all so bittersweet for me. My emotions are so out of control but I love my baby so much and find that she is worth all of the sadness and increased depression I am experiencing now. I will post again and put up a picture of her next week. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mrspapajohn Posted July 11, 2009 Report Share Posted July 11, 2009 Oh, Talia - - I am so happy for you. You must be on a roller coaster of emotions. I will be thinking of you and Samantha.Kathy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LarrysGirl Posted July 11, 2009 Report Share Posted July 11, 2009 Congratulations and we can't wait to see her! Try and take good care of yourself right now, Deborah Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marsha Posted July 11, 2009 Report Share Posted July 11, 2009 Congratulations, Talia! I'm glad you let us know - now to take care of yourself. I'm looking forward to the pics - Hugs, Marsha Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jo got the keys? Posted July 11, 2009 Report Share Posted July 11, 2009 I am sorry to intrude here without knowing you, but I just have to add my "Welcome to the world" to your beautiful baby, and especially being you are fellow Pennsylvanians! I know nothing about you and your circumstances, for which I apologise, but I can assure you that your lovely daughter will bring you all the joy in the world. My granddaughter's oatmeal kisses are the only thing that takes my hurt away! All the best to you and the baby, and congratulations! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MartyT Posted July 12, 2009 Report Share Posted July 12, 2009 Oh Talia, what wonderful, uplifting news! Happy Birth Day, dear little Tabitha ~ we're all SO glad you are here, and we cannot wait to see a picture of you!! Welcome to this world, precious little one! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Mayhew Posted July 12, 2009 Report Share Posted July 12, 2009 this has brought tears to my eyes, but they are happy ones ... I feel as though she is "our" little gift (as well as yours Talia of course ) ... something so precious and special and she will bring hope and happiness to us all. Well done and congratulations Talia. CAn't wait to see photo!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kath Posted July 12, 2009 Report Share Posted July 12, 2009 That is fabulous news, Talia! Welcome little Tabitha! I bet you can't stop looking at her! Babies are such wondrous miracles. Glad you are here.Kath Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
valley Posted July 12, 2009 Report Share Posted July 12, 2009 The miracle of birth! Bless you both,Valley Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
laurieb Posted July 12, 2009 Report Share Posted July 12, 2009 Cngratulations and God Bless your entire family... I will be praying for all of you.laurie Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JeanneC Posted July 13, 2009 Report Share Posted July 13, 2009 Talia:I am sorry that I am a little late in responding. Congratulations on your new baby girl. How exciting for you. I hope she brings you many years of love and joy.Love,Jeanne Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kayc Posted July 13, 2009 Report Share Posted July 13, 2009 Talia,Congratulations! I am so happy for you! And yes, we DO want to see a picture! And Talia, I'm glad she looks like Marc... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LostnEmpty Posted July 16, 2009 Author Report Share Posted July 16, 2009 Thank you all for the congratulations. I am trying to stay strong for Tabitha but it is really difficult because I keep on thinking about Marc and how he should be here sharing these moments. He was looking forward to the birth of our baby so much and it's just not fair that he was taken away from us. I am sad and cry all the time because I miss him so much. It is so difficult having to do this without him and on my own. i hope these feelings and insecurities go away soon, it is really taken a toll on me.Here is a picture of my beautiful little angel. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JeanneC Posted July 16, 2009 Report Share Posted July 16, 2009 Talia:Tabitha is just beautiful. What a head of hair. Enjoy every moment with her. I am sure your husband is looking down and pleasing both of you.Love and God Bless to you and TabithaJeanne Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
laurieb Posted July 16, 2009 Report Share Posted July 16, 2009 Taliayour perfect angle is simply beautiful... I am sure that your husband is there with all of you in spirit guiding and loving all of you. I can't imagine how very difficult this is. I wish I could give you some support but I can send prayers daily for your family and hugs from Virginia.Please keep in touch with us. I really look forward to logging on and hearing from you as we are all thinking about you.Laurie Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LarrysGirl Posted July 17, 2009 Report Share Posted July 17, 2009 So precious! Thanks for sharing her with us. Take good care of yourself and that sweet daughter, Deborah Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
moparlicious Posted July 17, 2009 Report Share Posted July 17, 2009 What a beautiful baby girl. God Bless. LOve, Kim Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kath Posted July 17, 2009 Report Share Posted July 17, 2009 Talia,Your daughter is beautiful. I am so happy you have each other. I can only imagine how angry and upset you are without Marc here to hold her, but I do believe he is near to you and will be watching and helping where he can. It may be that some of your tears come from post-partum depression. It is very real and very normal. Please check with your doctor if you don't feel better after a few days. You are going to be a really busy young woman. It is important to sleep when you can and drink plenty of fluids. Maybe you could keep a journal of letters to Marc, writing down all the things you love about little Tabitha. Children grow up so very fast, that it would be marvelous gift to her someday. She could see how you talked to her dad and would learn those traits that she has of his. The anger is normal, too, by the way. At one point I said out loud to my children that when I got to heaven I'd give Bob a good kick for leaving me alone. My son (the sage that he is) said, "Mom, Do you think God will even let you in the door if you're going to be so violent?" It's a stage in this awful grieving process, but it does lessen as we find new strength in ourselves. Do you get many visitors? Kath Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Mayhew Posted July 17, 2009 Report Share Posted July 17, 2009 I've just sat here for the longest time looking at your beautiful little girl. She is adorable and I know she will bring you so much happiness. But right now I understand that you will be feeling Marc's loss acutely. I hope you have support from Marc and your families and friends xx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
valley Posted July 19, 2009 Report Share Posted July 19, 2009 Talia,Oh your beautiful Tabitha! Her little hands, her full lovely lips, her dark hair....what a joy. You and Marc made this miracle and you will be a wonderful mother. Bless you both! If friends and family offer help, please accept it. And of course you can also ask for help. Take care,Valley Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LostnEmpty Posted July 24, 2009 Author Report Share Posted July 24, 2009 Thank you all for the compliments on my daughter. Kath, I have been keeping a journal of letters to Marc for the past few months but I haven't been able to write in it lately as much as i would like because I am so busy with Tabitha. I have gotten 2 visitors to see Tabitha. One was a friend from my job and the other was a friend from my sister's job. Boo, I don't have the support of Marc's family because all they care about is money and that's all they cared about even when Marc was alive. The only family I have is my sister and mother and they try to help when they can but they have their own lives to deal with. My sister has a 1 1/2 year old and he is a handful. I don't have many friends and the 3 that i do have are busy with their families. I hate to say it but motherhood sucks because I am doing this all on my own without my boyfriend Marc. If he was here I would be happy- we would be happy. Everything is so difficult and I don't have time for anything. I know I should see a therapist but i just don't have the time to, I barely have time to brush my teeth! I have an appointment with my psyhchiatrist next week and i am going to ask him to increase my meds which will hopefully help me in all of these additional horrible and sad feelings I've been experiencing lately. I also won't be able to come on this website as much but i will try to because I need to and everyone here is so supportive. Thanks for listening to me babble on.Talia Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kath Posted July 24, 2009 Report Share Posted July 24, 2009 Dear Talia,Being a new mother is exhausting in itself, so I can only imagine that when you add grief work to that, it quadruples. Cry when you need to. Tabitha won't think anything less of you. It's more important than ever for you to take really good care of yourself. Rest when Tabitha rests. The only way I was ever able to get anything done around the house with babes was to put them in a sling and carry them around with me. In MN there are programs to help buy milk, cheese, peanut butter and cereal for moms and their children. Is there anything you need?Kath Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LostnEmpty Posted July 26, 2009 Author Report Share Posted July 26, 2009 thank you for your advice Kath. I don't need anything and here in PA we have a program called WIC which helps with providing formula, milk, juice,eggs and cheese. I am on that program because it helps out with the formula since it can be so expensive so i am okay in that department. I try to take naps when Tabitha is napping but it can be hard especially when i need to do things like washing and making bottles and laundry. I do have a sling that i can put her in so i will probably try that around the apartment like you did. I do cry when i need to since i can't really stop myself and i am always thinking about Marc. Right now i am typing with one hand and i am holding Tabitha with the other and she is falling asleep i just wish i didn't cry so much all the time and whenever i talk to Tabitha about her father. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LarrysGirl Posted July 26, 2009 Report Share Posted July 26, 2009 Talia, take it easy on yourself. You've got a new sweet baby and you are grieving. Its only natural that the tears come. A newborn is one of the most exhausting times as a mother and taking care of everything by yourself can be overwhelming. Please try to give yourself a break, don't try to do everything, let it go. Your well being is the most important thing right now and you have a newborn who is depending on you. All you need to do right now is REST whenever you can. I know its not easy, there are things to be done. But the most important thing is you and your child. Please take good care of yourself. Deborah Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kath Posted July 26, 2009 Report Share Posted July 26, 2009 I cried a lot after my firstborn and I wasn't grieving. In fact, it was the one thing I looked forward to more than anything for my whole life. Be gentle on yourself. Children are resilient. She'll love you even through the tears. The smiles will come some day when you tell her your stories. It takes time. Be patient with yourself. You are doing a wonderful job. Tabitha is a product of your love. That in itself is a fantastic gift.Kath Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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