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Looking For The Positives


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Kay, your ordeal with the refusal of your doctor and his staff to give you the results of your tests in a timely manner reminds me of an article I saved from a few years ago: Patients demand: 'Give us our damned data' . It just infuriates me that as patients we make every effort to submit ourselves to all the tests our doctors recommend, including paying for them, and then we must jump through so many hoops in order to learn the results of those tests. Just not right. I'm so sorry you're going through all the uncertainty of this, and the agony of not knowing . . . :(

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I'm angry that they aren't doing their job. I'm angry that I have to fight for everything and still can't get it done. Had they looked at the test results when they got them last Monday and called me same day to make an appt. I would have been seen this week and would know by now what is wrong with me. Had they not taken Wed. off they wouldn't be double booked today. I see a layer of indifference and it frosts me to no end!

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So sorry Kay, sometimes you just want to pinch someone's head off!! Made banana nut bread today, couple of friends coming over later tonight for cooking supper together, and a movie. Watching Arkansas Razorbacks play Old Miss right now. Rainy and dreary here today in this part of Arkansas. My sister is not progressing much at this time. They did another swallow test (to see if they can discontinue the stomach tube feedings) and she did not pass. She is pretty discouraged. Her window of opportunity is starting to close. I am planning to see her next week, c.diff or not.

QMary

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Oh QMary, I'm so sorry. I hope it changes...soon.

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Dear friends,

On this Thanksgiving, the fourth since Jane's death, I am thankful for this group and all it has given me. I've had a lot to walk through the last four years--more death and grief than I want to think about today. I very much doubt I would have gotten through it all as well as I have without this family to talk to.

I have other blessings to be thankful for today. But none are greater than this one.

Have a peaceful Thanksgiving.

Peace,

Harrty

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I hope everyone had a good Thanksgiving yesterday. I hope you each had someone, family or friends, to share the day. Had a lovely time meeting my daughter's fiancé's family and sharing Thanksgiving Dinner with them. It was a good day, and I came home and caught up on "The Voice". Then got caught up in a couple of episodes of "Downton Abby", and now I am hooked...will have to go back and watch all the episodes. Looking forward to a quiet weekend.

To those of you following my sister's illness....she is being moved to a nursing home closer to their home early next week. The chances of her ever being able to go home are slim to none. My brother and I are going over to see her on Thursday. Please, if you pray, keep her and the family there in your prayers.

Thank you

QMary

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I am so sorry to hear this, Mary. My father-in-law is still in rehab--and I worry if they will ever really let him out. He went to Jane's aunt's for Thanksgiving yesterday and, while he looked good, is nowhere near ready to go home. Gail took him back to the rehab place afterward. He barely handled three steps without help. so i understand how you feel about your sister's situation.

I will keep her in my thoughts and try to send some healing in that direction in my meditations.

Peace,

Harry

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QMary Re: your sister, and Harry Re: your FIL,

They're in my prayers. Mary, so glad she will be moved closer to home, makes it easier for her to get visits which will be important to her!

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QMary:

I do hope that the transition goes well. I know those decisions are never easy. KayC: I understand your frustration with the "systems" in place. They really stink!

I am trying to find some things to be thankful for. I miss Harvey so much. He was ill but he was alive last year at this time. It was so much better to get his sweet text messages, and the talks we had. It is heartbreaking. The only positive is that I am for sure going to graduate on 12-12 and my family will be traveling here from Dec 8-16. That will be nice. I really pray that Harvey is here that day in spirit. I never thought I could live without him. We used to tell each other that all of the time. I guess I can but I really do not like it at all. I am sad all of the time. It is not getting any better.

God Bless and happy Thanksgiving. There are things for all of us to be grateful for, but I guess some days we really have to look or stop and really think about it.

xoxo,

Audra

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That's a for sure, Audra! (some days we really have to look or stop and think about it).

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I'm thankful that my heart isn't as heavy with grief this Thanksgiving as it was last year. Yesterday as I lovingly looked at photos of our early marriage, I didn't weep. That's a first for me, a positive sign that the heavy burden of loss does indeed ease over time.

On Thanksgiving day, I took a 5 mile hike alone near our glacier. I stood at a lookout, phoned my Mom who's in a rehab center recovering from a broken hip and complications, she was unusually chatty. When her rehab team says she's ready, I'll take Family Medical Leave off work, hop on a plane and stay with my parents for a few weeks to help them thru the transition to home health rehab and nursing services.

Kay, I'm very sorry for your frustrating waiting game for your test results. Been there.

Jo

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Jo, I got my results last Monday...I was expecting one thing, not the several I got hit with. Am doing what I need to do to get my health back, it will take a while.

I wish I could have taken the hike with you! Where do you live that you have a glacier? How special is that! I hope you got a picture to show your mom. I hope your time with your parents is very special.

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I have been off of the site for several days, my brother and his wife were visiting, and we stayed on the mountain at our friend Tom's house. We had a retirement party for Tom on Friday night. It was very successful.

My brother and I drove to Melbourne on Thursday to see our sister Lois, who has been moved from the hospital in Mountain Home to Melbourne nursing home. We are glad she has been moved to Melbourne, it is much closer to her family. The daughter that really takes care of everything is only about 5 minutes or less from the nursing home. Our sister was very much there, and we had a good visit with her. We are all coming to the realization that our sister will probably not ever go home, and will be in long term care. My niece's husband is buying a nice flat screen TV for Lois's room, and her daughter Sherry is going to decorate for Christmas. The 2 hour trip over, and then 2 hour trip back was nice, my brother and I got a chance to visit along, which we normally do not get to do.

QMary

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QMary, I'm sorry about Lois' prognosis, but I'm so glad she's closer to family now, that'll help so much! A person just can feasibly travel to visit several times a week when they're hours away, so I'm glad she has her daughter close by. I'm sure the decorations and flat screen t.v. will perk her up! My son & DIL bought me one a couple of years ago (it's 32" so it fits in my old entertainment center). I love it!

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I have a positive to share...my daughter called last night and plans to come up and bring/fix dinner on Christmas. She isn't sure about Christmas eve and doesn't know if her husband will have to work...he worked Thanksgiving so is supposed to have Christmas off but you can't count on his employer to come through. I reminded her that he may be able to take the Family Leave Act for Christmas Eve and Christmas being as my surgery is on the 23rd...I can furnish proof of my surgery if they want it. His employer knows me as Don's "Mom"...I'm not sure he knows I'm actually his MIL or not, but it might make a difference. It'd sure be a help, maybe Don could go get Arlie and bring him home for a few minutes with me! I'm going to be missing Arlie most of all. I've suggested my son and his wife come for a "late Christmas" after I've had some time to heal.

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I am sorry, QMary, that your sister is not doing as well as we'd like. I am glad that she will be closer to her family.

The retirement party for Tom must have been a respite for you ~ I am glad that it was successful.

Oh, I know you will have a good visit with your daughter on Christmas, Kay, ~ not sure about what food you will be able to eat so soon after your surgery. I am praying that all goes well and that you will have someone with you as you heal from the surgery. Who will be watching Arlie? I love positives.

Anne

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Kay, great news about your daughter coming/bringing Christmas dinner. I hope they can be there with you for your surgery. Is your neighbor going to be keeping Arlie? Yes Anne, Tom's party was a nice bright spot in the middle of a lot of darker things going on in my family. He was very pleased also.

QMary

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Kay,

So glad to hear about your daughter. It will be a comfort to have here there, I know, and to have people around while you are healing. Wonderful! Who is taking care of Arlie?

fae

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QMary,

I am just hoping for better days and happier moments for you this holiday season. I hope some things work out with Lois, that your family can take a respite from all the challenges whirling about, and that you can have some moments of peace and joy with everyone.

Much Love,

fae

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