Looking For The Positives

[shalady]

That is wonderful! I am so glad things turned around, that person resigned and now the Theatre Company can move ahead once again. It makes me happy to hear your excitement and enthusiasm. Hopefully your group will be able to mend any business relationships that have been damaged. It sounds like something you really enjoy. I am glad you have something to look forward to.

Shalady

[shalady]

Thank you so much Marty.

[HAP]

Dear friends,

Mary, your news is wonderful! Marty, thanks for posting the link. This week's edition is running behind. Anne, if you have not had the surgery yet, I'll warn you it is taking forever to get my energy back. The pain has been non-existent, but I am really tired, even after nearly three days spent doing virtually nothing more than reading and watching DVDs. After the gum surgeries, I was fine after two days--and they seemed like a much bigger deal when I was sitting in the dentist's chair.

So I am taking it easy again today. No walking beyond what it takes to get to the mailbox, no lifting beyond plates, bowls, and small pots of oatmeal, soup and pasta. I've looked at potential stories for the podcast but won't write them up, record them or do any post production work. I did some writing yesterday, but could feel the focus was not entirely there, so I won't frustrate myself with that today, much as I may need to. There is no point to it if all I will have to do is throw it out anyway.

Time to fix some lunch then head back into a novel for the rest of the day--with maybe a nap thrown in if the spirit moves me.

Peace,

Harry

[enna]

I had the second step of the implant surgery yesterday ~ bone graft healed nicely and now I have the implant secure in my mouth. Monday I return for the follow-up after surgery. I guess it depends on how one heals before the permanent tooth goes in. My surgeon said anywhere from two to three months.

Harry, I told my dentist about the nail/wood story and he said mine would not be anything like that ~ it wasn't. I prayed ~ just in case. I guess I'm on soft foods for a few days again! Why is it a filet with my mushroom gravy, a twice baked potato, grilled asparagus, honey glazed carrots, triple chocolate cake, and a good red wine sound so good right now?

Arizona is a wonderful place to rest. The temperatures have been in the 70s here in the valley and it is good to sit out on the patio feeling the warmth of the sun.

I am waiting for the second podcast, Harry.

[kayc]

Anne, I think we want what we can't have. When I was in town the other day, a fresh maple bar from Cal's donuts sounded so good to me, but fortunately, I resisted. I don't have to worry about temptation in my home town, there's nothing in town to buy! (I'm not even a donut person, but Cal's is the best I've ever had.) I made homemade Kale chips last night and Kitty and Arlie even like them!

QMary,

So glad to hear the latest about the theatre...not that it was left in a mess, but that the disagreeable person resigned. You will get the working relationships with other companies back in order in no time! Congratulations!

I was told that the church is not getting a new computer program, so I'm stuck with home Quicken that doesn't even do payroll taxes and reports, ugh, but I'll make do for now.

[Wifflesnook]

My positive is that I'm proof-reading for a book which lists and describes the species of birds seen at our nature reserve area since the year dot. If my Pete were alive it would be him, as he was a professional in many ways. I agreed to do it and said I would try to channel Pete which I feel I am doing. I'm doing ten species a day because it's quite hard to concentrate upon, picking up syntax problems, spelling, punctuation. I've found that I need to feel that I do something creative every day. I guess I was always that way but now it's even more imprtant to me. I'm also deeply involved still in the campaign against the siting of a visitor centre in my village. I don't think we can stop it but we are doing our best. And next week I go to stay with my daughter and two littlies for a few days. I haven't seen them since early January. And we are going to the opera one night to see Traviata.

All sounds good doesn't it? But as you all know these positives skate along a surface. Underneath ......

But I know I am lucky to still be able to do stuff so won't end that way.

[kayc]

Jan, It's good to hear from you, I have noticed you absent as of late, but that's not unusual here as it ebbs and flows. It's good that you have something you enjoy to occupy your time. I'll have to look for you on FB more.

[JeL]

G'day to all here. My positives this week:

I went to a concert with a friend who lost her mom recently, have another planned for this upcoming week with the friend/hospice nurse who guided my husband's end of life....all part of my quest to be more social.

I started medical massage for muscle strains I got from a bad car accident early last month. She warned me I'll feel worse before I feel better and she was right! I've got weekly massages set up through February.

I was out of state for 4 weeks recently helping my parents as Mom recovered from a nasty hip fracture with infection and cardiac complications. Mom's doing better, and I'm finally caught up on my backlog that piled up at work while I was gone.

It's a lazy day....a cozy fire's in the wood stove and later, a "play date" with a 6 year old to bake cookies.

Jo

[HAP]

Dear friends,

It may be the calm before the storm here despite the fact it has rained all day. The latest forecast for Monday night through Wednesday morning is for highs in the low 20s with as much as 15 inches of snow possible. In NH, this would be no big deal. In Wisconsin, ditto. Here on the New England South Coast, where six inches slows everything to a crawl and eight inches can mean multiple no-school days, 15 inches is snowmageddon.

I did laundry this morning and spent an hour working on the basement clean-up. The Christmas outdoor decorations are boxed up and put away and I found the bottom of Jane's craft table, including the birdhouses we bought years ago and never painted or assembled. Once the weather warms up... I also found a tim wooden train set we found one year and never set up for Christmas. Maybe next year.

I've read something on the order of 1100 pages worth of novels this week. I really have not had the energy for much else--and felt more tired than I should have after this morning's projects. I have a ticket to the theater tonight in Providence--about a 30 minute drive and am looking forward to that. Normally, I take myself out for dinner when I go to a play, but with my diet so limited it isn't worth doing.

It looks, at this point, like I won't start working on the podcast until tomorrow. I hope to have it posted by Monday afternoon, but we'll see. The audience for the first one was not very big--under 50 as I write this. I know it will take some time to build an audience and that I have to be patient. By September, though, I should have a clear idea whether it is worth the effort it will take every week to make it happen. Honestly, anything smaller than 500 at that point will likely mean I need to think about a better use of the time.

My FIL seems to like his new bed. My SIL says he is having less trouble getting out of it than the regular bed he had--and that making it in the morning is much easier on her.

Jan, I know what you mean about editing. It does seem that there is only so long one can focus on the fine detail before it all begins to look right. Jo, good to hear you are getting out socially a bit more. Keep at it--it's good for you. Anne, I'm glad to hear the second bit of this is easier than the first.

Peace,

Harry

[Mommy1201]

Such a wonderful thread! My positive thing for yesterday, took my kids out and about. Went to the McDonald's play place, so they could play for a while. Then off to eye doctor to get my son's glasses fixed. Then a produce run at grocery store. Good day!

[kayc]

Mommy1201, That is what this thread is all about...LOOKING for the positive in our day helps our focus to not only see the grief and pain and loss, but to see other things as well. It inspires us to appreciate what we have, not only miss what we don't have. It has been a lifechanger for me.

Today it is 70 here, unheard of in Oregon in January! I am enjoying it even though I know the price will be paid this summer with drought.

I was voted in as Treasurer today at my church...now if only I can catch on to all that it entails so I can do a decent job as the past one did!

[MartyT]

Oh, you will catch on, dear Kay ~ of that, I am certain! Very wise choice on your church's part, I'd say!

[Mommy1201]

A couple good things today

I finally fixed one of two garage door opener clickers. Tomorrow I will set up the built in garage door opener button in the van I bought back in November. I have been putting it off, and wouldn't you know it, you need a working clicker in order to set it up.

My son, CJ, told me the other day that a girl in his class told him that her mom said she can't play with him. Since my children are multi-racial, I was afraid that was the reason. We live in a very small town, predominantly white, some Hispanic, and maybe half a dozen African American. Just over 8 yrs ago, when our social worker from the adoption agency called to tell my love and I that a birth mom had picked us we were ecstatic! The social worker said "there's a couple problems though". She was concerned that we wouldn't be interested because he's multi-racial, was a "crack baby", was exhibiting withdrawal symptoms, and was in the nicu due to apnea problems. To us these weren't problems. Right away we knew in our hearts that we were meant to be his parents! The only concern we ever had was how we (a white couple) were going to help him deal with the cruelties of the world as he got older. But we knew that together we could do it. Fast forward to today.... I Was so stressed and worried about why this young girl was told not to play with my son. Was even starting to panic...how on earth am I going to navigate through this alone?!? Then I remembered that one of my "mentors" at church lives across the street from this girl's family. So at church today I discussed this with her and asked if she thought it was racially motivated. She told me "oh, no honey. The girl's mom is middle eastern and her dad is African American." PHEW! Worried over nothing, this time. I know the day will come when we'll have to deal with racism, but not today. And for that I am SO grateful!!

Another good thing and I can count this one every day. My children! They are amazing! They are very well behaved and so thoughtful. I could go on, but won't. The BEST thing about them? They are very lovey dovey! I've told them lots of times that they make my heart happy. ❤️

Oh, another beautiful thing about our family. My daughter, Carina, is CJ's biological sister! I'm truly blessed, to be their mom.

Lisa

[feralfae]

Dear Mom 1201,

How wonderful that you have your children! And that they are lovey-dovey children. HUgs feel better than almost anything else. I am glad to hear the garage door is going to be totally operative with the van soon, too.

It sounds as though your are getting some things lined up, getting some errands done, and some things sorted out. Good for you!

Some days, we really do need that small boost of checking one thing off our "to do" list so we can feel we have accomplished something. In the midst of all you are doing, be sure "Take care of my precious self, body and heart." is on your list of things to do every day. Make a little time for you each day. It can be a good time to think of some of the positives each day brings. Today, we had sun and melting snow. I saw two rough-legged hawks and a Bald Eagle. I made a delicious dinner for myself, and enjoyed it. All positive things today.

*<twinkles>*

fae

[feralfae]

Harry,

I hope the weather is beautiful but not too tiresome. I am smiling at your "1100 pages" of novels read. Lately, I have taken up watching all the free movies on Amazon Prime. Free. Tomorrow, I get to use my treadmill, my stationary bike, and my free weights. Gently. (That is another positive for the day.)

Congratulations on getting so much done in the basement. I hope the evening at the theater was enjoyable. As well, it is good to hear your FIL is adjusting to his new bed.

Your days sound pleasantly filled with good things. I hope your strength and stamina are returning more each day, and that you will soon escape from quite so much reading.

*<twinkles>*

fae

[feralfae]

Oh, Jan,

What a wonderful project for the birding community! I am so glad to hear you are doing it.

Yes, underneath the surface, we still carry the grief, but at least sometimes when we are busy with other things, our emotional energy shifts to one less dominated by grief, and we are able to be more present and enjoy the here and now. But I am glad you will get to spend some time with the littles, and I hope the visit is restful and joyful.

I get to begin working out very gently tomorrow, a bit of treadmill, bike, free weights, but not much of anything, nor much weight or exertion, but at least it is a start.

I will be watching for your next post.

*<twinkles>*

fae

[feralfae]

Jo, I hope you have some restful days ahead of you. And I hope your mother is doing well. The massage sounds very helpful, and I hope the initial discomfort will end quickly. All good wishes to you, and welcome back around the fire.

*<twinkles>*

fae

[Wifflesnook]

Thanks Fae. I woke with a bad case of 'the glooms' this morning. Does that happen to you too? My underlying spirit is of sadness. A permanent thing I live with, but sometimes it rears up higher and it always seems to be on waking. My positive is that it isn't always so bad and it will clear away a bit once I get started on my day.

One of my friends is going through a bad time right now as her husband is in hospital again. She asked me to go and see, her, take my dog, and have a walk with her while she was having a brief respite from hospital visiting. She said it had brightened her up. It's just little things which help isn't it? I think I need some time with my littlies even though I know I find it tiring. Now that they are almost five and almost three it's easier in some ways than when they were really small. But sometimes I feel I just want to burrow deeper into my home and not do anything at all. Not an option and not good for me, so onward and upward Jan.

[R.Everit55]

Oh my goodness! It's a madhouse here. My son, DIL, and two grandsons are here. But I wouldn't have it any other way. Going to get 30 inches of the white stuff dumped on us. We have a fire going. They boys are excited school is canceled. For numerous days. They are bouncing off the walls. I think someone put some bouncy syrup on their morning pancakes. Yes, I made them their fave... Grampy's blueberry banana pancakes. These two boys are a bundle of energy. I sent them outside to play.

I had myself, Little Man, and both boys sleeping on our bed last night all night. I miss my wife so much. But I am sure is smiling above watching the chaos in this house. ❤️

I hope anyone who lives here in New England in the path of this blizzard stays warm. It's going to be really awful in south east CT where I am.

[HAP]

Dear friends,

I've had a busy couple of days battening down the hatches, getting the shovels and snowblower ready, baking bread, checking the larder, feeding the birds and locating my snowshoes. Worst case scenario, we are looking at three FEET of snow. They said yesterday we would see snow showers about 3 p.m. It started snowing about 10 a.m. Not a really good sign.

But I am ready as I am going to be.

The play Saturday was really good--a modern meditation on Thornton Wilder's "Our Town." The first act was funny in places. The second was especially difficult for me. We had a good conversation with some of the actors after the show. It's always interesting to hear how they got where they got to in the play. The set was amazing. I'm hoping to get to a conversation with the set designer on Friday, but that will depend on the weather--and whether or not we have any of this mess cleared up by then.

The podcast went on the back burner once the forecast started to get nasty. I remember the Blizzard of 1978. It closed everything for a week and cars were banned from the roads except for emergency vehicles. Making sure I had everything I needed--and that my in-laws did, as well--became the priority.

Fae, it's good to hear they are letting you do light workouts. Don't push it too hard. Kay, glad to hear the church recognized your value. R. enjoy the kids. This blizzard is looking like something else.

Jan, I know what you are saying. Somedays it feels so empty I want to scream--and editing the book is probably bringing a lot of things back. But, as Jane would say, we have to keep moving forward. It's the little things--like Mommy1201's garage door opener and trip to the Play Place with the kids--that remind us we can endure this--and grow.

Peace,

Harry

[R.Everit55]

Harry,

So apparently you are somewhere near me. We are in for three feet of snow as well. But the blizzard part hasn't really begun yet. Just a few inches now. Tonight and tomorrow will be horrible.

Stay safe and warm.

Butch

[Wifflesnook]

In England we get all upset about two inches of snow. I have to drive over to see my littlies on Wednesday and the forecast isn't good. But not by USA standards. Yes Harry, I know you know.and I know that just plodding on us my way of coping. It's just that time when I wake ....

It never goes away permanently but as this is a positive thread I should say I adjust as the day goes on. I know you all know exactly what I mean.

[R.Everit55]

Seriously, this blizzard is ridiculous! We have well over two feet in southern CT. And we have another 12+ hours to go. It's really bad out there now. Boots are useless. My feet are frozen. We are not getting out anytime soon. And it's just a total whiteout. The winds are insane.

Harry, I know you are dealing with this. Please be safe and stay in if you can. Anyone dealing with this beast of a storm, be safe.

I just really didn't need this storm stress 17 1/2 days after my love's death. My heart hurts so badly today.

The positive thing, though exhausting, is my son and grandsons are here. And the boys are glued to Grampy's side as always. I live and breathe for these boys.

Butch

This pic I attached... The trees are literally right in front of me yet you can barely see them it's so horrible out there.

[HAP]

Dear friends,

We are in a snow oasis here. Plenty of stuff blowing around--but nothing coming down the last two hours while it snows like mad everywhere else.

Yesterday afternoon, before things got bad, I went out to get the mail, only to discover a group of ROBINS sitting on the phone wire. Someone clearly didn't get the memo about the proper date to show up for spring. Or the one about the blizzard.

Jane and I used to shovel together. She would start at the top end and I would start at the street end and we would kiss when we finally got together in the middle. I miss that every time it snows.

R, stay warm. It's 16F here with a wind chill well below zero. I'm not sure what we have for a snow depth yet. It's hard to tell they way the wind is blowing. Jan, sorry. That came out all wrong--more a reminder to myself than anyone else.

Time to eat and check on snow depths.

Peace,

Harry

[feralfae]

Butch and Harry, I see from the weather reports that you two are scheduled for snow all day.

In contrast, it will be 50F here today, and sunny. We have serious premature Spring melt going on. A chinook, too. But it is back to snow by the weekend, so we are told. Heard the geese overhead at 2 this morning, while I was out checking on the beautiful starry sky. And the cottonwoods are in bud, which is not good this time of year. We usually get our last Montana blizzard around 15 April, so we are not done with winter yet.

Stay warm and cozy, and enjoy the respite. I remember as a child on the ranch, when we would snug around the fireplace and read stories to each other all day while the snow blew outside. I hope you can capture that feeling of being safe and warm inside for yourself even if only for a few minutes today. Cocoa helps.

*<twinkles>*

fae