iPraiseHim

My sister has Covid. She is vaccinated and planned to get the booster this week. She has moderate symptoms that are being managed with medications and rest. Thankfully, her symptoms are weakness, congestion, and tiredness. Our Christmas gathering is postponed for now. - Shalom (Peace)

Happy Anniversary, Rose Anne, 32 years ago. I still remember the day as if it was yesterday. I cherish every day with you. - Shalom (Peace)

Checking in: It's been a busy summer. I replaced my garage door and lift. Cleaned it out and can now park my van inside. No more scraping ice, snow, etc.. and I can leave my cleaning supplies in my van now. I installed a new mailbox and have donated most of Rose Anne's clothes, shoes, bags, etc... It took me this long to get to it. Each person's timeline is different. I still miss her everyday. I doubt that will ever change. Working on taxes, more cleaning and repairing of my home. I am still working my business and able to function. Keep pressing forward to the mark set before us each day! - Shalom (Peace)

Because life is unfair. Your feelings are normal and a part of this grieving process. Grief is our unexpressed love to the people we love. It take time to learn that we cannot change the past. The decisions we made then were based on what we knew and understood then. Acceptance of that takes time, tears, and struggle. Feelings are not to be ignored, yet they are not always facts. Upon examination, contemplation, discussion and prayer, we can learn from them when we pursue the truth. Your loss of your father is deep and profound. We who are left behind by our loved ones understand and empathize with your grief. It is good to be able to have a group to discus these thoughts and feelings with people who understand and care. - Shalom (Peace)

UPDATE: I took my Ham Radio Extra Exam last night and passed. I have been studying for it daily since I took the General exam on March 27th. We have a serious gasoline shortage in my area due to the Colonial Pipeline shutdown. Fortunately, I found some gas on my return home last night. It is 30 cents higher than my previous purchase, but I need gas for work next week. May is the month I struggle with... this too shall pass! State minimum wage went up 31% and gas 30%. I lost a 6-year client this week because I haven't taken the jab. I still miss Rose Anne daily. I doubt that will ever change. Yet I still press forward to the mark set before me. Shalom(Peace)

Welcome to our friendly and supportive community. There is no timeline on Grief. I believe the biggest misconception is that somehow we "get over it" and "move on". This is not reality. Each person has a different timeline with the journey of Grief. To me grief, is the love you want to express to your Mom, yet it is difficult to manifest. My mother, brother, father, and beloved wife have all passed and each one of them I grieve differently. My beloved wife, Rose Anne, is the most challenging and brought me to this wonderful community over six years ago. The intense grief for the loss of my wife was probably two years. I still grieve for her to this day, but the intensity has lessened as I've come to learn some tools that are shared here as well as the fellowship with our community. I cannot not "Move on" but rather choose to "move forward" with both grief and this healing journey. It takes time, patience, and understanding. Most people do not know or understand this level of grief for our most beloved. It really helps me to express all of this to people here who care and support each other. I am glad you found us yet sad for what brought you here. Take care of yourself. Grief takes a lot of energy, and we need to learn how to nurture and take care of ourselves and our health as we also learn these tools to deal with grief. - Shalom (Peace)

UPDATE: I sat for the General Ham license on Saturday and passed it. I'm learning how to communicate with other operators. It is a chance to meet and talk with other people. This last year has been really isolating with lockdowns and restrictions. I am pursuing the Amateur Extra License and plan to take the exam on May 13th. - Shalom

My call sign is KO4OGV. "Keep on for One God Victorious". I'm learning how to use the radio and plan to sit for the general exam next Saturday. - Shalom (Peace)

Watched this post this morning and had to share it. We never know how we will touch and affect other people even through grief and mourning. This encourage me and I hope it does the same for you. https://www.facebook.com/faizel.sampson - Shalom (Peace)

Update: I passed my Amateur Ham Radio Technician license on March 4th. I'm still waiting for my call sign, so I can operate a ham radio. I'm now studying for the next level: General License. My other good news is my roof repairs and complete shingling of my home was finally completed last week. The job was delayed three weeks due to constant rains. I keep pressing on. - Shalom (Peace)

Happy Heavenly Birthday my beloved Rose Anne. It's been six years since you departed Earth. I'm looking forward to the time we can see each other again. - I love you more each day and as we told each other many times, "I'll see you in Heaven" - SHALOM(PEACE)

UPDATE - I've been busy working and dealing with life on life's terms. I'm thankful that I saved enough of an emergency fund to repair and re-shingle my roof. Repairmen are planning to start work next week however rain is predicted (thankfully not snow) for the next few days. I still need to get my hernia repaired, and I will not be able to perform physical work for 2-6 weeks. I'm looking for a work partner and there are several challenges with this (state mandatory payroll increases, additional insurance requirements, training, etc...). I have had several dreams about Rose Anne this month that seemed so real and peaceful. I seem to miss her more as time travels forward. I still get those flash memories of her that cause me to tear and cry. Being away from her presence is still difficult although manageable now. Her heaven birthday is this month on the 16th - 6 years. I discovered that wearing face masks cause my blood pressure to go up. I had a routine exam with my endocrinologist, and he wanted to immediately put me on blood pressure medication. The good news is I took my blood pressure at home several times, and it is in a good range 110/65. (No mask/No doctor's visits) The doctor took me off of my low dose thyroid medicine, and I'll be retested in a few months. Hang in or at least hold on as we press forward to the mark set before us. - Shalom (Peace)

Happy Birthday, Marty! Thank you for your tireless service to our community - Shalom (Peace)

Merry Christmas! 2020 has been an interesting year? This is the sixth Christmas with much mixed emotions. I continue each day to keep pressing forward to the mark set before me. I am fortunate to be able to work especially this year. I'm thankful this group was here for me in my darkest hours after the sudden death of my beloved wife. I'm still learning to accept things as they are as how they should be... learning to manage my expectations. Take care my friends. - Shalom(Peace)

Happy Anniversary to my beloved bride, Rose Anne. 31 yrs ago today. We both said I do and we did. It is the sweetest memory of our union. We are separated by flesh but not by the Spirit. " I'll see you in Heaven!" - Shalom

Joan_s, My heart weeps with you as you share your dreadful experience. The initial shock and awe of this does feel like a nightmare. All of your thoughts and feelings are normal. Your mind is trying to sort out and make sense out of all of this. The "what-ifs..." and "if only I..." is only natural. The best advice friends here gave me was to try and get some sleep, drink, water, and take this one moment at a time. Look into searching for a grief counselor who can help you through this challenging time. Meanwhile, this group and Marty T has plenty of resources that helped me and many people here learn to deal with grief at this most difficult moment. I will be praying for you peace and comfort and that you will know that you are never alone in this. This group has helped me so much when my beloved wife died and my world was turned upside down. Take care of yourself. - Shalom ( Peace)

It took me quite awhile to deal with the Shock and Awe of my beloved wife's death from complications of Type 2 Diabetes. I learned to just take one day at a time. It was a couple of years after her death that my childhood dream of flying was rekindling. It was the first time I was looking FORWARD to something instead of just mourning her death. It was a weird juxtaposition. As part of this renewed passion, I determined to lose weight. In this process, I stalled after losing 45lbs. I was so determined, that I discovered the reason and that I too was pre-diabetic. When I learned the ROOT CAUSE and that I could STOP the progression of this disease, I changed my lifestyle, shed another 135lbs and put my diabetes in remission. There is a HOPE and a FUTURE! I now have the opportunity to help many other people. I still want to learn to fly yet there are a few other obstacles in my path yet I will not give up. My hope still flickers.I keep pressing forward to the mark set before me. This community has helped me tremendously through those early times and darkest hour. Working through the grief steps that Marty T provides helps us to trudge through our personal grief journey and our community is here to support each other. Take care. PS I haven't even really thought about enjoying life... I'll have to ponder that. I have come to learn to accept life on life's terms. Shalom (Peace be with you)

Nashreed, My heart beats with you as i read your comments. It takes time and grief work to journey through our grief. Life will never return to what it was yet there is still a reason and purpose for our existence. My wife died over five years ago, yet at times it still feels so recent. The life and memories we shared will forever be in my hearth and mind. I have learned that feelings are not always facts yet when examined they will lead me to Truth. It feels like my life power was dimmed when she died, yet I trudge forward through life. Marty T offers many tools in our community and please know that you are not alone in this. My family and friends do not understand this personal type of grief. It doesn't go away or that we can just shake off. Our community here helps, listens, and understands because we are going through a similar journey. This group helped me in the darkest hours/days and they now sustain me as I continue to trudge through life. We are not alone because we share openly with friends who understand and empathize with us. Take care my friend. - George - Shalom (Peace)

No damage. Just some rain. - Shalom

The hurricane will be downgraded by the time it reaches my area in Eastern coastal Virginia. Just some winds and rains predicted for Saturday. The previous hurricane came right over us three weeks ago. I had some minor repairs. This Hurricane is much stronger with category 4 winds. Praying everyone is safe and secure. - Shalom

I'm not an expert on etiquette, I was informed I "should" send out thank you cards after the funeral when my wife died. I just didn't have the strength or energy to face that task. I have learned not to "SHOULD" on myself over other peoples expectations of how I should perform or grieve. You also have a newborn that takes much of your energy. I was in shock for a long time and grief itself takes a lot of energy. You are not being rude to take care of yourself. We are here as a group to help you through this process and let you know that you are not alone. Please take care of yourself and your health. Take care - Shalom ( Peace be with you)

You are fortunate to have your parents to help you through this. I struggled with many things in the early days. It takes time to come to terms with the death of your beloved Brian. I had images of when I found my beloved wife, Rose Anne dead. I have pictures of her through my home to remind me of the better days and times. I pray, write, or journal through those roughest times. There is no timeline for this but it helped me to know that I am not alone in this grief journey. There will be a time when this grief pain is less intense and severe. That time is different for everyone. For me, I need to just focus on one day TODAY, not the past or the future. Life will never be the same yet we all have lessons to learn through this grief and healing process. My wife and I are physically separated yet she is still a part of my spirit, mind, and life. I pray you find your grief journey that helps you through this shocking time. Shalom (Peace)

Missy1965, what you share and experience is very common as you sore out this grief and pain. One of the lessons I have learned on this journey is that "Feelings are not Facts, yet when examined will lead us to Truth. You are still in the early phase of "Shock and Awe" that I went through just learning to accept life as it unfolds. I could sleep, I couldn't eat and at times led to even breathe. This safe place gave me shelter, comfort, and a place to share my struggles with the lost of my beloved wife. Grief takes additional energy. Take care of yourself, your body, even though you don't FEEL like it. Please continue to share and learn these great tools and resources MartyT provides us to help us on our journey. You are not alone... We care for you! (Shalom) Peace

Praying for comfort and peace for you. It is a tough decision to make and as you say the price of love. Shalom (Peace)

I just turned 65 last month and all that it entails. Dealing with Medicare decisions the last six months forced me to face my biological age. It has been over five years since, my beloved wife, Rose Anne, died, and I still miss her everyday. I'm weeping just writing this. I am also have an essential job and fortunate to still be able to work. Having a sudden heart attack six months ago rocked my world as well. I'm thankful I am still alive and there was no damage to my heart. I am trying to make the best of this situation in life and help others that suffer from diabetes. There is a hope and a future that the medical doctors never gave my wife. I cannot change the past. I can only hope to share to all who will listen that there is a hope and a future. Loneliness is the toughest part of this side of grief. I pray and think about you often. There were several of us thrust into this grief world involuntarily. Fortunately, Marty T provides a safe haven and great tools of recovery and dealing with this on a daily basis. Take care my friend. - Shalom (Peace)