Some GOOD news!

[WolfsKat]

I just had very good news.....I had my final Social Security appointment, and will start widow benefits in January, all paperwork done & DONE!  I'd figured I'd have to keep slogging along, eventually part time, at my job, although it has become increasingly difficult, both physically and emotionally.....until I reached full retirement age.  But!  I received a notice from my ex-husband's pension provider that I would be getting a percentage of his retirement pension, per the court order at our divorce in 2004.  I had, literally, forgotten all about it.....all I wanted at that time was to NOT be married to him, and paid little mind to the terms of the divorce!  I sent them my new address, and banking information, and they said that the "actuary" would notify me of the monthly (for life!) amount.  I figured it would amount to a hill of beans, if I were lucky, maybe as much as a hundred bucks a month, and did not think more on it.  Anyway....I received the letter....and (good thing I was sitting down!) was floored to find that the monthly payments will be enough (combined with my widow's benefit) to enable me to QUIT my current job!  In fact, the 1st payment had already been electronically deposited!  I will finish out this year at work, and will still work part time January until the end of March....but then, I am done!  I can still earn up to $9,000.00 a year, but I will look for a part-time job I truly would enjoy once I move back to Michigan in late April/early May!  It may not seem like a lot to many folks, but, for me, this is like winning a lottery!  My Connor would (and, I think, IS) be SO SO SO happy for me......he hated Walmart, having worked there himself for years, and had so wished I could quit them!  This certainly gives me some financial peace of mind, and a bit of hope for better days than I've had since I lost him!

[Widowedbysuicide]

I'm so glad to hear your good news!  I can imagine the huge relief you are feeling.  Sometimes we don't have a clue of how stressed our minds and bodies get until the moment that the stress is removed.  

Good for you!  It's wonderful to feel joy for you!

[brat#2]

That's great news.  It sure will help now that you won't have those financial worries as much and that you can quit your job and find something that you might actually enjoy. I'm happy for you!

Joyce

 

[MartyT]

I'm sure you must feel as if a ton of bricks has been lifted from your shoulders, Kat, and I'm so happy for you  ♥

[Gin]

Kat,

So glad you do not have to worry about that anymore.  What a relief!!

Gin

[Brad]

Kathy-

So very, very happy for you.  Financial security is so important as we move into retirement and that is one less struggle for you.  I'm happy you're moving back to Michigan; actually I didn't remember you moving back to Florida.

Again Congrats (and if this were on the iPhone message app you would be seeing confetti rain down)

 

[kayc]

Kat, I am SO HAPPY for you!  If I could drive in the dark, I would probably volunteer at an animal shelter but it's 120 mile round trip from here.  Still, I enjoy volunteering at the senior site and at my church, although days like today I question my sanity (working on annual budget for mtg.).  I hope you find something you really enjoy.  It helps to not have the confines of needing a certain amount of income!  This is the best news all day, triple like!

[rdownes]

Kat am so happy that you have something to make your life alittle easier for you amazing news

[Polly]

Kat,

I totally understand how you are feeling. That is the best news! I had something similar happened just last week. It all started at the end of Sept., when I realized that I never received my lump sum death benefit from social security. Something made me go to their web site. For some reason I started looking at the rules for survivor benefits for children. You see, last year when I first went to a lawyer, he told me that I could not get benefits for my daughter because she was Rich's step daughter. Well that is not always true. I called my local office the next morning. They told me I had to go in there on Oct. 28. Last Thursday, I received a 6 month back pay for her. She will now start receiving benefits until she graduates high school. I felt just like you are feeling right now. It was a big relief. No more stressing about how I'm going to provide for her needs.

[WolfsKat]

Thanks, everyone!!!  It's so great to have some happy news, for a change! I won't be on Easy Street.....but will have enough for the basics covered okay.....luckily for me, my wants/needs are fairly modest, and I'm excellent at frugality.....and this so frees me up with my move, I can live anywhere I wish, rather than having to find a place near a Walmart that would accept my job transfer!  Financial worries have burdened me since Connor's passing......and I know many of you understand that.....hard to deal with at a time when our loss is bad enough!  I'd do a happy dance if my arthritic knees would let me!   I'd much rather have my Connor back than any of this......but I know he's happy for me!

[kayc]

Polly, so glad to hear your news too!!

[Marie Lee]

Awesome! Congrats :-)!!!

[kevin]

Kat, that was excellent news.....I stress to my kids about retirement, importance of pensions(and they raise their eyes like I did, ).....and be prepared to be alone.....Most Pension plans have a survivor option, I'm glad you benefited . 

[Margm]

On 11/7/2016 at 0:28 PM, WolfsKat said:

I move back to Michigan in late April/early May!  

So happy for you.  I thought I would feel Billy more down in Louisiana than Arkansas, and I do feel him as much as anywhere.  

I know I have to get our papers together (I have them in a folder) to go look at new cars.  The first few months I kept that folder right with me.  I still have 17 big plastic boxes I have not even opened, almost like I am waiting for him to come open them with me.  Now that folder with all our business papers.  I have to find it and my mind won't let me think about where it might be.  I am procrastinating.  The thing is, I told those people I would be in before noon tomorrow to look at vehicles.  I don't want to go anywhere, I don't want to look for my folder of business papers.  I know I have to, but I am sure not wanting to.  I had occasion yesterday that I needed more than two seats, a lot more running around than was necessary.  It is almost/exactly like I cannot do it without  Billy.  I have come a long way without him in this past year.  I have to push myself, and if it were not for my granddaughter, I probably would just sit in one chair 24/7.  

ADDENDUM:  I emptied two more boxes.  Only have 15 now.  Did not find my folder.  Cannot think of what I did with it.  Cannot think. 

[Polly]

7 hours ago, Marg M said:

  I have come a long way without him in this past year.  I have to push myself, and if it were not for my granddaughter, I probably would just sit in one chair 24/7.  

 

I have come a long way in the past year as well. I think your granddaughter is about the same age as my youngest daughter. She keeps me going. Otherwise, I would probably sit forever as well. I swear, she is so much like my mom! She will tell me what I need to do at times. Sadly, I usually do it. LOL.

[Margm]

To Billy and me, Bri is perfect.  Of course we would think so.  She will not put up with racial slurs (I am not gonna do like Paula Deen and cry, but I have cleaned up an act that was pretty clean to begin with).  She keeps me honest.  Good kid to have gone through so much.  I sure don't want to die now, hope I live long enough to see her get started in life.  I think Billy would want that too.  I knew Billy, and everything I do for Bri is done knowing he would do the same.

[kayc]

Marg, it may be too late with the time difference but could you have Bri help you look for the folder?  What kind of car are you looking at?  

[Margm]

 I didn't want to go.  I went. I didn't want to stay.  Brought me an offer.  Man wants to buy my truck, good price.  Took another 1000 off besides the sale of the truck.  Like Scott said, why couldn't they do that at first.  Starts pouring down rain.  A man who just lost his wife of 49 years comes to talk to me (he works there).  Nah, I'm leaving.  Only had the two colors.  The black one looks like a giant water bug. Brought percentage rate down to almost nothing.  I am not having fun.  I don't want to be here.  Talked to Billy on the way over and at the same time Scott calls.  He will go with me next week.  I am at the door watching the rain pour down.  I don't want to be here and darn sure don't want to go to Ford, Chevy, Nissan (called and broke appointment). Man who lost his wife still talks to her too.  We both felt it a very natural thing to do.  

I don't want to go to more car places.  I need a car.  This one with the big mouth will do just fine.  Metallic silver is a nice quiet color.  By the time I am coming home it is night.  I don't drive at night.  I have numerous safety devices that alarm when something you do is wrong.  By the time I got home I had three of them alarming.  I did know where the heater was.  Turned it on and front window frosted up.  I don't know where defroster is.  Cannot roll down windows, they don't roll.  I pulled over to the side of interstate, me and this insignificant little car that might just be a piece of gravel to an 18 wheeler.  I find the defroster.  It is going home from work time.  Damn that time change.  

I made it home.  Parked in my little space that I could always see the tail of my truck sticking out.  I could not even see my little car.  I will learn how to drive it in daylight before I go anywhere again.  I will find the windshield wipers.  I will find out what the funny little boxy package light that comes on in alarm (yellow).  I will find out what the two whisps of yellow that alarmed the whole way home to the right.  

Oh, did I tell you it tells me the temperature outside?  My black truck did that.  I'm just glad to be home safe.  I will figure out things tomorrow.  

I did not find my big folder, but I did find my financial information folder.  I was okay.  It was sorta sad to get rid of the truck, but did not hurt like giving up Billy's truck.  I am in another time and place and alone............but, I did it.........and I drove at night.   

[kayc]

Marg,

Do you have an owner's manual?  If not, you can order them on line, can usually get a used one on eBay.  It'll tell you what the lights and alarms are for and where they're located.  You can probably find out on the manufacturer's website too or call the dealership for that make..  

Marg, It sounds like you just weren't in the mood.  Car buying should be a fun thing, not a stressful thing.  I wish I could go with you, that's one thing I'm good at.  Right now is the best time to buy a new car, you can get a new 2016 model for a song and a dance and they'll throw in the financing.  I just looked and I could get a new Honda fit for $15990 with 0% financing 63 months.  My niece just bought a new 2016 Mazda at a great price for .9% (less than 1%) financing.  They're trying to clear out 2016s and will get rid of them for less than they paid for them in some instances.  If you drive a stick shift you can get more knocked off for that because less people want them.  I wouldn't get black, too hard to keep clean (three time black car owner...slow learner).  
Can you take your son with you next time?

[Margm]

You know Kay, actually these days the only thing that excites me is a Sonic cheesecake shake.  I guarantee you, I got a very good deal on this little car.  Whenever before that I picked out my vehicle, I always picked out one that fit me.  My sister-in-law would never pick out anything but a white Lincoln.  Looks are not that important to me.  It just has to fit me.  That is like I buy a size 3X Tee shirt because I feel more comfortable when something does not sit on my behind.  So, I buy a car for just the opposite.  It has to sit on my behind and I have to be able to reach and see things all around me.  In 1960, I drove my dad's new Chevrolet to Senior Day.  That also was the year of the high fins in the back of vehicles.  I could not judge distance and the vice principals new car fin took right down the center of my dad's new Chevy.  Did not hurt the principal's car at all but did damage from the front to the back of my dad's.  I don't wear a 3X size car very comfortably.  

I scare very easily.  I lack courage.  Doing things anyhow, to me, that is not courage, it is necessity.  I just went out to  the little car and it has a beautiful manual inside a big thick faux leather case that is about as big as the car.  I will attempt to study that.  Billy was always the one who read the manuals.  I think my concentration might handle a paragraph or two at a time.  

[kayc]

Maybe you should get a Honda Fit!    I'm not good with "boats" either, although I sure enjoyed the car George and I picked out together...a Mercury Grand Marquis (like a Lincoln Towncar before they shrunk).

[Margm]

Oh, I saw a small Jeep parked in front of the office yesterday.  I had never seen one that small.  It is a  limited edition.  I have no regrets.  It is a nice silver little car for a sometimes not so nice silver old lady.  I will get used to it.  And, I love the payments and I also like the fact they will come anywhere to change my tire or anything else, no charge.  I think they all have that now, but I sure didn't have it on my 2004 Ford Ranger, so I was afraid to travel much in it.  I don't need a truck.  I do need a hatchback.  I got it.  And those tires are so small I think I could take a big bag of rubber bands and just substitute them if I have a flat.  I don't think I looked at a Honda, Kay.  I'm glad I forgot about them, my mind was a splattered mess with just the ones I was looking at on the computer.  To Billy's credit, I did look at a new color of purple they could order for me.  Somehow, he told me to forget it.  I forgot it.  I wanted the cayenne red, but the silver one looks like all the others on the road right now, and it does what I wanted it to, so I am fine.  One of my widow friends told me I did not need the cayenne red one.  I probably didn't.  

And Kat, I have hijacked your very good news post.  I am sorry because we all need good news.  

[kayc]

So you bought the jeep?  A friend of mine has a limited edition jeep, bought it brand new, she loves it, got it to drive in the snow.

Good you got the silver, doesn't show dirt or chips as easy as red and maybe you'll avoid tickets.  

[Margm]

No, I bought the Toyota Yaris yesterday.  Don't want tickets.  I think they will look at me as an insignificant blur.

[kayc]

I had a Yaris as a rental three years ago, I loved it!  Only thing I didn't like is it didn't have an armrest (driver's right side), but easily fixed with a cushion!  It handled nice and got good mileage and was comfortable.